Forever In Eternity

Alex stood on the balcony of his now lonely apartment. The wind blew around his face, cooling his alcohol-flushed face. His gaze was set at the four-way stoplight about three blocks away. He spoke no words, only continued to gaze at the place that took his lover’s life. He gripped the railing harshly and glared at the happy couples walking on the sidewalks below.

“Motherfuckers,” Alex mumbled as he grabbed the bottle of Jack Daniels at his feet. The almost half empty bottle was quickly finished in a few gulps. Alex didn’t cringe as the harsh liquid went down his throat. The stinging ended a week ago. He had literally drank himself to numbness.

Physically at least…

Alex released his grip on the railing and stumbled back into his apartment. The flashing light on his answering machine beckoned him closer. It was a slightly terrifying journey across the kitchen, but Alex finally made it to the irritating flashing red light. He pushed the button that played his messages and sat on the chair next to the table holding the machine.

“You have two new messages,” said the female voice emitting from the machine. “First voice message: Hey Alex, its Mom. I just wanted to hear your voice. Your father and I are worried about you. Call us back please. It doesn’t matter the hour. Just call. Love you.”

Alex hastily pushed what he hoped was the delete button and leaned his head against the wall while he listened to the next message.

“Next voice message: Alex. I’m coming over today. You’re going to eat, shower and like it. I’ll be there in an hour.”

Fuck, thought Alex. Rian and Zack were coming over. He didn’t want them to see him like this.

Knock, knock, knock.

Fuck. Alex groaned and moved his head from the wall to the table.

“Alex? I know you’re in there,” Rian’s voice came in through the wood of the front door. “Alex, let us in.”

“Isn’t the door open?” whined Alex.

The door knob jiggled and twisted, but no one entered the apartment.

“Alex…”

“Hold on.” Alex stood up and slowly made his way over to the door. His hands were outstretched in front of him to make sure he didn’t run into any walls. The front door seemed miles away, but Alex knew there would be hell to pay if he didn’t open the door. He made it to the door and twisted the lock to the right. With that simple motion, the front door opened and Alex saw his two friends standing before him.

“Dude, you look like shit.” Zack said eyeing the slumping mass of drunkenness leaning against the wall.

Alex’s knees could no longer hold him up and he fell with a loud thud! to the floor. Zack sighed sympathetically and looked at Rian.

“He’s worse than I thought,” Zack said to Rian, who nodded and shook his head.

“I don’t know how we’re going to help him,” said Rian. “There’s just a pile of empty bottles on his table over there.”

“I’m right here guys.” Alex stared up at them. As he stared at the two, they saw a thick glaze over his brown eyes.

“Come on, buddy. Let’s get you to the couch.” The boys each grabbed an arm around Alex’s biceps and lifted him up slowly. They didn’t want him throwing up all over their shoes.

“Gerroffmee,” mumbled Alex. His head was spinning more than usual. Maybe it was because he drank two bottles of Jack Daniels in one hour. Alex didn’t know or care; all he knew was he still felt the hole in his heart. The alcohol had made him physically numb, but he still had yet to reach the level of emotional numbness he felt would suffice.

“You’re drinking too much,” Zack stated. “Your liver is going to fail you by next week.”

“Good.”

“Alex, that’s a bad thing.”

“I don’t fucking care,” Alex grumbled with his head tilting to the right. Rian and Zack finally reached the couch and gently laid Alex down without him hurting himself.

Alex really was a pathetic mess. He was still wearing the same clothes he wore to Jack’s funeral (which was a week and a half ago). He was wearing a white button-down that was decorated with a rainbow of different colored stains. The collar of said shirt was turning yellow from sweat. The once neatly-ironed black trousers were wrinkled and graying around the knees. The bottoms hems were tattered and tore; the pockets were turned inside out and showing the accumulation of lint balls that had formed within the past week and a half.

“Alex, dude, have you taken a shower…recently?” Rian wrinkled his nose in disgust.

“I’m not sure… the wedding?” Alex closed his eyes and started to nod off.

“Alex! Dude, stay awake,” Zack hit Alex’s arm and he jumped a mile into the air.

“What the fuck was that for?!”

“You were falling asleep,” Rian said. “We need to talk.”

“’Bout wha?” Alex rolled over and cuddled into the pillow on the couch. “’M tired.”

“It’s because you’re drunk.” Zack said with almost no inflection what-so-ever.

“So? Why do you care?” Alex’s voice suddenly became violent. “So what if I’m drunk? I lost him. I fucking lost him! He was my everything. I’m nothing without him.” Alex stood up suddenly and the other two glanced at each other. Alex was never an angry drunk, but, then again, every time they saw Alex drunk previously, Jack had been alive. “I don’t need your fucking sympathy. Neither of you would understand. I’ve been in love with him since I was fourteen. Fourteen! That was seven fucking years ago! God damn it!”

Alex picked up the pile of magazines on the coffee table next to the couch and threw them at the wall. The magazines hit a mirror and shattered the glass. Thousands of little fragments fell into the plush carpet.

“You don’t have to live in a house where everything fucking reminds you of him.” Next was the whiskey bottle; only this time, it was aimed at Zack’s face. Zack, luckily, ducked just as the bottle flew past his head.

“Alex! Alex! Calm down!” Rian ran towards his demented friend and attempted to restrain him. “We’re not here to upset you! We only came because we’re worried about you! We haven’t seen you since the funeral. We wanted to make sure that you hadn’t done anything stupid.”

Alex picked up another empty bottle and readied it to throw, but when he made eye contact with Rian, he broke. The bottle dropped from his hand and tears started to fall from his eyes.

“Rian… I can’t do this,” Alex’s hands came up and covered his face. Zack and Rian broke a little on the inside at the sight of their best friend sobbing. They never realized how far a man could fall. Rian walked over to his sobbing friend and embraced him tightly. Alex wrapped his arms around Rian’s torso and cried into his shoulder. Zack walked over to the hugging med and too embraced his friend’s within his strong arms. They stayed like that for quite some time before Alex showed greater signs of exhaustion. Rian and Zack helped him back onto the couch. Alex immediately clutched to the nearest pillow and fell into a coma-like slumber. Rian fetched an empty trash can to set besides the couch while Zack retrieved a blanket, a glass of water and two aspirin. The sight of their broken friend saddened them; Alex was never the one to break from anything.

”Alex, baby, I’m scared,” Jack whined.

“It’s just a rollercoaster,” smiled Alex. He had always been the adrenaline junkie. “It’ll be over in less than two minutes. Come on Jacky! I wanna go on the coaster!”

“Fine… How can I say no to you?” Jack grinned. He took Alex’s hand and walked towards the line to The Raptor. The boys were taking a vacation to Cedar Point. Jack wasn’t too happy about the arrangement, but it made Alex happy.

The boys walked over to the line for the ride and Alex was practically jumping with anticipation.

“Babe,” laughed Jack. “Calm down!”

“No! I fucking love roller coasters!” He grabbed Jack’s hand and ran to the end of the line. It was only a twenty minute wait because they visited the park during the off season. Soon they were strapped into their harnesses and they were flying. Alex was laughing in amusement while Jack was screaming. They twisted and turned for about two minutes and then they were unhooking the harness buckles across their chests.

“Remind me never to let me get talked into one of your crazy ideas again.” Jack shook his head and rubbed his eyes.

“Oh shush,” Alex laughed and grabbed Jack’s hand, once again, to drag him around the park for several more hours.

Alex stood on the back near his apartment. The waves were crashing onto the shore; the sand was cool from the night air. Rian and Zack left a few hours earlier, leaving Alex to fend for himself.

“You promised you would never leave me…” whispered Alex to the night air. “I made you promise, Jack. I made you swear. You told me you would never leave me.”

Alex sank to his knees. His pants were quickly damp with chilly water. A single tear escaped the confines of his eyelashes.

Things were getting heated. Alex and Jack were a tangle of limbs on their king-sized bed. It was the night of their three year anniversary; the dinner reservations that they had made were well forgotten.

“A-Alex. Ohmigod,” moaned Jack. His hips were rolling forward and his hands were tangled in Alex’s hair. Alex’s head was bobbing up and down Jack’s shaft. He removed his lips and started up at his lover. Jack’s eyes were coated in a thick layer of lust.

“I love you so much.” Alex cooed. “Baby, I want you.”

“Then take me,” breathed Jack. Alex grinned and crawled up Jack’s body to press his lips against the smaller man’s swollen lips. After a moment, he moved his lips to Jack’s ear and sucked on his earlobe.

“Alex, if you keep teasing me like this, I’ll never last.” Jack groaned loudly as Alex flicked his tongue over a sensitive patch of skin on Jack’s ear.

“’Lexy!” gasped Jack. “Fucking get in me!”

“Alright,” smirked Alex, reaching over to the bed side table and opening the drawer. “Oh fuck.”

“What?” Jack rolled over to face Alex.

“This.” Alex held up a small piece of paper that read: ‘we need more lube ;)’. “God damn it.”

“I don’t care.” Jack stated after a split-second’s silence.

“Jacky. I’m not going to hurt you.”

“Alex, at this point, I’m so fucking horny,” Jack bit his lip. “I don’t care if I bleed or if you tear me open. Hell, I wouldn’t care if I couldn’t walk straight for days. I. Just. Want. You. In. Me.”

Jack grabbed Alex’s face and crashed his lips against his own. Alex immediately responded and moved to hover over Jack. He moved into position and looked directly into Jack’s eyes.

“I trust you,” Jack brushed the hair out of Alex’s eyes and smiled.

It was a rough several minutes. Alex wanted to be as gentle as possible, but jack wouldn’t have it. He pushed his hips up towards Alex’s hips and thrusted against his pumping hips.

“Oh gods, Jack.” Alex groaned.

Moans and screams were the only noises comprehensible. Whenever actually words were attempted, they were quickly transformed into a primal scream.

Alex had no trouble finding Jack’s prostate and pounding into it with every ounce of strength he could muster. Both men were soon screaming as their orgasms erupted with atomic force. Alex gazed upon Jack’s face with utmost adoration. Jack’s mouth was open slightly and his eyes were rolled to the back of his head. His chest was heaving and a mixture of Jack and Alex’s sweat made Jack’s body shine.

“I love you,” whispered Alex softly.

“I love you more,” smiled Jack. “I would do anything for you.”

“Anything?” asked Alex.

“Anything.”

“Then marry me.” Alex pulled out of Jack and stared into his eyes.

“You want me to marry you?” Jack smiled and laced his fingers with Alex’s fingers.

“Yes. I love you.”

“Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Would you rather I say ‘I do’?” Alex wrapped his arms tightly around Jack.

“Will you promise me something?” Alex asked after a moment’s silence.

“Yes, my love?” Jack tilted his head towards his now fiancé.

“Make sure you never leave me.”

“I promise to never leave you.” Jack kissed Alex’s cheek and cuddled into his side.

“I’m serious,” said Alex. “I want you to swear to never leave me. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you. I love you so much…”

“Alex,” Jack looked directly into his lover’s eyes. “I swear I will never leave you. I promise I will do everything possible to always stay by your side.”

Alex smiled and hugged jack again. Within minutes they were both sleeping peacefully in each other’s arms.

“You promised…” Tears were falling freely from Alex’s eyes.

It was around 3:30 in the morning in the real world, but Alex had lost his sense of time at his wedding. He had been sitting in the sane for about five hours. His body was shivering from the cold breeze that was gently blowing up and down the beach. Alex shifted and felt the reason why he came down to the beach in the first place. His right hand went to his side and found what he was looking for.

“If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?” Alex pulled his gun from his side and look at it intensely.

“Jacky, since you’ve gone away…” Alex turned the safety off. “I’m going after you.”

Alex lifted the gun to his chest.

“Let’s see if it really does make a sound…”

He pulled the trigger and then his limp body fell into the cold sand.

“Jack?” Alex called. He looked around and took in his surroundings. He noticed he was on the same beach he was when he shot himself. Only now it was day time and also he was wearing a clean white tuxedo. “What the…? Jack? Jacky?”

“Alex!”

Alex spun around and saw Jack running towards him wearing a similar white tuxedo.

“Jack? What?” Alex started crying. Jack was here. Was he dreaming? Jack was dead, but did this mean that Alex was also dead?

“Alex, do you want to miss our wedding or what?” Jack smiled and grabbed Alex’s hand, pulling him in the direction from which he came.

“Am I dreaming?” the confused man asked.

“No,” Jack grinned. “We’re going to get married in Eternity! I promised I would never leave you and I now I’m proving it. So… come on!”

Alex ran beside Jack, fingers faced, to the alter about twenty yards away. They were grinning and laughing as they reached the pastor at the front of the aisle. Alex refused to let go of Jack’s hands as the pastor began to speak.

“We are gathered here today to join these two souls together as one. Here, where they will live forever in Eternity…”