Mann Gegen Mann

After Christoph left I took care of my hard-on, and then went for a shower to wash off. After my shower I got dressed and went downstairs. It was already 6pm and it was Christoph's and Paul's turn to cook. They were cooking honey soy chicken with rice. I walked up behind Christoph and gently tapped his ass. Christoph gave me a glare. I was confused what did I do wrong? He was the one who came up to my room and started rubbing lotion on me. I couldn't help it if I got hard from it.

"What's wrong?" I mouthed from the other side of the kitchen counter.

"Nothing," he mouthed back. I wasn't satisfied with that answer. I knew there was something wrong. I pointed at Christoph then pointed at the deck outside. He nodded his head so I knew he understood. I walked out there and after he finished chopping up the chicken he came out.

"Christoph, I know there is something wrong. You don't give a guy an incredible hand job and let him go down on you then give him the cold shoulder," I explained.

"Richard I regret doing what I did. It didn't mean anything to me. I just hope you can forget about it," he explained. I felt like I just got hit by a bus. All I wanted was to show him that I have deep, passionate feeling for him and when I did, he said it was meaningless. I felt so crushed.

"Yeah I feel the same way," I lied "I just hope this doesn't affect the band or our friendship."

"It won't," Christoph said "I'll still see you as that annoying 'pretty boy'." I laughed.

"And I'll still see you as that annoying 'curly haired fucker'," I told him. He laughed before walking back inside to help Paul with cooking dinner.

I couldn't believe that I was letting the one I've loved for a year walk away from me. Yeah that's right I've liked him for a long time and I finally realized that it was love. I was sitting on the couch with Flake and Ollie. Flake was watching the news - he was like a father figure in the band, he always knew what was best for us. Ollie and I were playing a punching game every time we saw something blue we had to shout 'Blueberry' and the other person in the arm. Playing the game with Ollie was much easier than playing it with Till. You'd have a dead arm within three minutes. Don't get me wrong, Ollie hit hard too, he was just a bit shy about hurting someone.

"BLUEBERRY!" I shouted on the top of my lungs and punched him in the arm and he whined. Flake glared at us before asking if we could be quiet. Christoph walked into the lounge room. He was wearing an apron and with his loose curls you would've thought he was a house wife, if you forgot about his masculine features like his board shoulder, his perfect chest and chiseled jaw line.

"Dinner's ready," he said then walked back into the kitchen.

"BLUEBERRY!" Ollie shouted, catching me off guard and punched me in the arm. I pouted as I held my arm and walked into the kitchen. We all took a plate off the kitchen counter and took a seat at the dining table. Christoph didn't sit next to me that night like he usually does. Instead Paul did. He wasn't annoying while he was stuffing his face full of food.

"Are you sure you cooked this Paul?" I asked "it's too good to be your cooking." Paul glared at me.

"I did cook it and Christoph helped. You can even ask if I cooked," he whined.

"Okay, okay I believe you," I replied. We finished eating in silence. After dinner I went up to my room. I lied on the bed with headphones in my ears. I was staring up at the ceiling while 'Stricken' by Disturbed played in my ears. My room was getting darker while the sun was setting and the dark night was blooming. I had been listening to music for hours yet it only seemed like minutes. I woke up from a nap that I was having. I stopped the music and went downstairs. I walked into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water. I saw Christoph lying outside on the lawn chair. I hesitated to go outside but I did.

"Can't sleep?" I asked him. He looked up at me then looked out over the horizon again. He didn't answer but I could tell that's way he was out here. I sat on the lawn chair next to him.

"I understand if you don't want to talk to me," I whispered.

"No, I do want to talk to you," Christoph said.

"Chris, I need to talk to you about what happened," I told him. He sighed; I knew he didn't want to talk about it.

"I'm sorry but I have to get this off my chest. Chris, I've liked you a long time and just as friends. I don't know how or why it started but I just started getting all these strong feeling for you Chris. I don't except you to feel the same way," I told him. Christoph sighed.

"Richard, I told you it was meaningless to me," he explained.

"I know, I just had to tell you how I feel about you," I told him. I got up and gave Christoph a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"Goodnight Christoph," I whispered in his ear. I then walked back up to my room and went to sleep.