Quiet Boys.

Scared.

I couldn’t believe.
I wanted to, but couldn’t.
She always seemed so against it. Not against the happiness it brought, but the pain and the vulnerability.
Because, she was Parker Reynolds. Nothing or no one could bring her down.
“Parker, what?”
She looked up at me with those large grey eyes, the short brown hair trying to hide them.
As soon as she looked away though, she took back her hand and turned her back to me, mumbling to herself.
“Wait, Parker. Come here,” I said softly.
Of all the times I had wanted to say those words to her, I had been too scared.
I still was too scared. I didn’t want to frighten her. It seemed though, that she had frightened herself.
“Um, hi,” was all she said, as I turned her to face me. Her eyes looked fearful in fact, the way the light was hitting them. She was pressing her lips together.
“Did you mean it?” I asked.
She couldn’t answer.
“It’s okay if you don’t.”
“I’ve never been so speechless in my life,” Parker whispered in my ear. She sat on her countertop, and took another drink from the wine bottle.
I just watched her. Her hand was shaking.
Did she need to drink to confirm that she loved me?
“Parker, can you put the wine down, please?”
She looked like I wasn’t speaking English.
“Why?”
“Because I’m trying to be serious right now.”
“Ivan, I don’t have time to be serious.”
“Well, then. You’re going to have to make time.”
“Ivan, what does it even matter? I’m with you okay?”
Suddenly, I felt angry. I felt hurt. Why did it kill her so much to confirm it if she meant it. Why would she be so embarrassed if she didn’t? Either way, I was the one being hurt now. She wasn’t being fair.
“Why does it matter!? It matters because, well. Because.”
“Because, what, Ivan?” Parker asked in a way that sounded like she’d rather be doing something else, while rolling her eyes.
“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!”
It didn’t mean to come out so loudly, but it did.
The way she looked at me, maybe this is how she felt. Because suddenly I didn’t want to talk about it and my stomach dropped, and I knew my hands were shaking. Not just my hands, probably my whole body.
“Now, do you mean that?” Parker asked, sounding like she was going to cry.
“Yes,” I said. I didn’t stutter, my voice didn’t shake, though I was afraid.
She walked over and kissed me, more so than she had ever done.
I put my hands on her. She was beautiful.
She pulled away for a moment, smiling so wide.
“I have goosebumps,” she whispered. I smiled too. I laughed. It was shaky.
“I mean it,” I said.
“I meant it too.”
Once again, all I could think about, was how I was never good with people before. I was glad she had brought out something good in me. In fact, I was pretty sure the only good in me was her.
♠ ♠ ♠
I got really bored, and decided to update this one again.
Oooh.
This really is the last one until August though.