In Fear of Life

Oh, my. Oh wow. Don't stare. Do. Not. Stare.

Matt stood in the mirror, playing with his hair. The clothes were so..tight! I needed air. I needed out, before I do something I'll regret. Gus, on the other hands, thinks not. "Let's watch a movie!"

Matt seems to be okay with it, so we end up in a smaller room in the back of the house, which has surround sound and a huge comfy couch. I'm in between Gus and Matt, and Gus is switching through movies on his universal remote.

Excitedly, he says, "Let's watch Titanic!!" Damn him. My favorite movie, but he knows it makes me cry when Leo dies. D:

"Okie dokie. Adam, go make popcorn." I sigh at his lazy ass and get up from my seat, and Matt stands too.

"Can I use your bathroom?"

Gus laughs, "Sure, it's next to the kitchen. Well, duh. You did use it to take a shower, didn't you?" Matt's face goes a little red, and i want to go 'aww', but that would rule out my nonchalant act.

After I reach into the microwave and walk down the hall, eating some of it, I hear a squeak and a 'THUD', come from the bathroom. Oh god. Running towards the door, I hear "Adam, don't com-"

Before I walk in a slip on the wet floor. Suddenly I'm on top of Matt, whose laughing his precious head off. I, however, am completely silent. Matt stops laughing and looks at me.

"Adam..I want to tell you som-" He starts to whisper before Gus runs in and falls on top of us. Ouch. "Ohmygod!" Gus grimaces. "It's a good thing I know this floor is clean or I'd be freaking out right now." We are on the bathroom floor, I think to myself. No time for romancing.

We're all soaking wet, so Gus digs out three pj pants for us to wear. "Matt, do you wanna stay over?" For a minute, it looks like he's about to say no, but then he nods. I giggle, then mentally slap myself. I'm such a freak.

Anywho, we remake some popcorn [since the old bag is on the wet floor, pieces of popcorn floating], we head back to the couch. I remember one thing. "Matt, how did you get the floor so wet, anyways?"

His face goes bright pink again. "Well..there were so many knobs on the sink, and they confused me, so I turned both on high and they gushed out like mad!" I laugh so hard at this, I feel tears stinging my eyes.

Anyways, of course, when Leo dies, I find myself gulping for air, crying my eyes out. Matt looks at Gus and Gus shrugs, then mouths 'Do something!' at him. Matt tentatively puts his arms on my shoulder and pulls me close, while I bawl my eyes out into his shirt. I can't help it! I cry too much!

I guess this is what it sorta felt like for Matt earlier. When the movies over, after Rose drops the necklace into the water, Gus gets up and Matt is still holding me, not because I'm crying anymore though.

Suddenly, I'm hyper aware of how I breathe, move, anything. I close my eyes and feel very sleepy. Gus laughs. "He's too comfy to move. I'll sleep in my bed, you guys sleep out here."

Although in my mind, I'm freaking out, I'm too tired to open my eyes. "Nerr..I'm fine.." I mumble out. I feel Matt's chest vibrate as he laughs. He makes himself comfortable and pulls me next to him, my head still on his chest. I feel like such a girl. I mean, if he didn't like me, why would he still be holding me?

After Gus brings us blankets and pillows, he turns off the lights and goes to bed. I feel Matt's heartbeat under my head, and it makes me feel so safe, like someone cared for once. "Adam?" I hear him whisper. "Yeah?" I whisper back.

"Oh. Just..checking to see if you're awake." He sighs and leans his head back against his pillow. I start to think. Now would be the perfect time to kiss him, to confess my undying love to him. Undying love?! Admit it, Adam. You're head over heels. Lifting my head, I look up at Matt to see he's watching me. I see the reflection of light in his eyes.

It's so dark, I can't see the expression on his face. Does he know I'm looking at him, too? Der, you lifted your head, silly. STFU! I think to myself. Wow, I'm weird. and in my ramblings of weirdness, I almost miss Matt's soft whisper, so soft, so quiet, I almost miss it. Almost.

He said, "I love you."

My eyes go wide and for a second I think I've heard him wrong. Then I lift myself up and closer to him. Our faces are only inches apart. I feel his breathe on my face. He smells so good, like cotton candy and axe spray.

Our lips meet, and I swear I see fireworks. So soft, it makes me melt into his arms. I feel his hands, shifting though my hair.

I pull away and look into his eyes. "I love you, Matt." I feel so happy, I want to explode.

Suddenly, he starts crying. Oh no. I've ruined it. I've screwed everything up. I jump off him, and look around for a nanosecond. "I'm so sorry."

Then I run out of the house, down the street, and I'm gone.