Sequel: Just When We Learned How To Live ›
Status: Complete, check out the sequel:)
In Fear of Life
Chapter Fifteen.
Matt[/b[
Pain. That's the first thing I feel. Am I awake? Am I alive?? I want to scream. I hear a steady beeping sound, but now it's getting really frantic. Voices. All around me. I try to open my eyes, but it feels like there are 10 pound boulders on my eyelids.
I can see a little bit of lights, and figures. Someone is talking to me. Who..? "Matthew..hospital..loss..blood..Adam.." I hear snatches of words, but the one I really hold on to is Adam. Adam? Where is he? I'm guessing I'm in a hospital..so I'm still alive.
I send a silent thank you to Ryan for helping me, because I know he did. thankyouthankyouthankyou..I don't know how to make him feel how grateful I am, but I hope this helps my cause.
I don't know how long I lie here, drifting in and out of conscience. I feel someone touch my face, so soft. I try to open my eyes. I hear more words, blurred, but I can hear them.."Matt.."
It's Adam. It has to be. He's here with me. Adam..I want to say..Adam, please. I can't open my eyes, and I can't talk. More words.
"Matt..I hope...hear me..doctor's did everything..power to help ...it's up to you...have to fight...to live...please..Matt.. I love you... much." I get the meaning of what he's saying..I have to wake up.
For him. Fully wake up. I hate being stuck like this with no way of talking to him. I try to wake up, but it's so frustrating!
Why can't the doctors give me something to make me wake up? I mean, it's not like I can just flip a switch and wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. I chant those words over and over in my head. WAKE...UP!!! And something happens.
My eyes..open. Wide. I can see.
There's no one in the room, and it's dark, for the exception of a tiny light coming from the wall.
I try to say something. "A..Adam.." Until I break out in a coughing fit. My throat is on fire! A nurse rushes in and checks my stats. "W..water.." I croak out. She looks at me. "One minute, please." And then walks out of the room.
Wha..where is she going?! I'm dying here! Of thirst, maybe, but come on! I just worked all day to wake up and this is how she treats me?
But then I immediately take it back when I see who she went to get. Adam. Tears sting my eyes as he hurries over. I can tell that he looks reluctant to touch me, but I'm not that fragile. Am I? I lift my arms a little, and he smiles before he grabs me in a soft hug.
My throat still hurts, however. "Water.." Adam jumps up and fills up a Dixie cup with water. It tastes like the best thing in the world.
Then it's Adam's lips on mine, and I forget that I'm even in this hospital bed. But when he pulls away, I say, "Adam..get me outta here..These drugs are crazy. I want to go home with you..let's go home.." And even though it is half the drugs talking, I mean it. But I don't understand when a sad look comes over Adam's face.
"What's wrong?" I ask. He shakes his head. "I'll talk to you about it later." One more thing I forgot. "Adam..why are you here?" He looks at me, then chuckles. "I forgot you don't remember. I uh..well, I went into shock after they took you away. I freaked out. So they decide, eh, let's put him in there, too." He tries to make the last part funny, but I can still hear the sadness in his voice.
"Adam..it's okay. I'm okay. When am I getting out of here?" I ask.
Just then a doctor comes in. "Hello, Mr. Wilkens. It's good to see you awake."
"When..when can I leave?" I ask again.
The doctor looks at me. "Well, if everything goes okay, you can leave in a week or so. Your stitches still need time to heal, and the pain would be unbearable without lots of drugs, so it's best if we keep you here."
I stare at him. A week? No..I can't do that. I want to go home. I try to get up, but I'm so weak, when Adam presses his hand against my shoulder, I can't get up. I sigh, irritated. A week. A whole week.
Adam's POV
A nurse walks in the room, right as I'm about to fall asleep. "Mr. Johnson, Matthew is awake now." I jump up and follow her to his room, but push past her. Matt is there, looking at me with confused eyes.
Tears start to fill his eyes, and I can feel mine threaten to well up. He lifts his arms, and I smile as I hug him. "Water.." I hear him croak. I jump up and get him some water. He drinks it down like it's jesus juice, hehe. Don't ask.
Matt..I press against him, our lips meeting. This is why I'm here. I love him. He's amazing. But I don't want to push him, especially since he's in a hospital bed! Raping the patients is not allowed, I would think!
"Adam..get me outta here..These drugs are crazy. I want to go home with you..let's go home.." I can hear the dopiness in his voice, from the drugs, but what he's saying sounds so good. I have to tell him about my parents. Maybe I could move in with Gus?
Matt notices. "What's wrong?" He asks.
I shake my head. "I'll talk to you about it later."
He looks up, like he just remembered something. "Adam..why are you here?"
I chuckle. "I forgot you don't remember. I uh..well, I went into shock after they took you away. I freaked out. So they decide, eh, let's put him in there, too." I try to make it sound like not such a big deal, and it's not compared to what happened..to him..I still can't believe I almost lost him.
"Adam..it's okay. I'm okay. When am I getting out of here?" he ask. Just then a doctor comes in.
"Hello, Mr. Wilkens. It's good to see you awake." Matt looks at him.
"When..when can I leave?"
The doctor responds, "Well, if everything goes okay, you can leave in a week or so. Your stitches still need time to heal, and the pain would be unbearable without lots of drugs, so it's best if we keep you here."
Matt looks devastated. He tries to get up, but I press a hand to his shoulder, and he lays back down and sighs.
One Week Later, Adam's POV
I'm on Matt's bed, talking about random things. Where we grew up, what things have been like. He tells me about Ryan, about why he started crying that night. I feel so bad. Not that bad, though. I mean, there are a lot of makeout sessions between daily medication, hehe.
Finally, Matt remembers what we were talking about. "What was wrong, that night I woke up? You said.." I shake my head..It's not important. But he's persistent. Finally, I break down.
"My parents kicked me out. I'm living with Gus, but it's only temporary, since his parents don't like me much." Matt stares at me.
"Why did they kick you out?"
"Because, Matt. I'm gay. I'm a fag. I'm not normal." I sigh, then he pulls me into a deep, intense kiss. Once again, I feel like, this is where I belong.
When he pulls away, he says, "Adam. Come live with me. I know..it's not what you're used to. I'm not rich, or..loaded or anything, but.."
I shake my head. "I can't impose on you. And Matt, it doesn't matter. I love you." Matt sits up higher.
"No, seriously. I need someone to look after me, anyways, so..Adam, will you please live with me?"
My eyes go wide as I realize he's serious. Could I? Could I really stay with him?
Pain. That's the first thing I feel. Am I awake? Am I alive?? I want to scream. I hear a steady beeping sound, but now it's getting really frantic. Voices. All around me. I try to open my eyes, but it feels like there are 10 pound boulders on my eyelids.
I can see a little bit of lights, and figures. Someone is talking to me. Who..? "Matthew..hospital..loss..blood..Adam.." I hear snatches of words, but the one I really hold on to is Adam. Adam? Where is he? I'm guessing I'm in a hospital..so I'm still alive.
I send a silent thank you to Ryan for helping me, because I know he did. thankyouthankyouthankyou..I don't know how to make him feel how grateful I am, but I hope this helps my cause.
I don't know how long I lie here, drifting in and out of conscience. I feel someone touch my face, so soft. I try to open my eyes. I hear more words, blurred, but I can hear them.."Matt.."
It's Adam. It has to be. He's here with me. Adam..I want to say..Adam, please. I can't open my eyes, and I can't talk. More words.
"Matt..I hope...hear me..doctor's did everything..power to help ...it's up to you...have to fight...to live...please..Matt.. I love you... much." I get the meaning of what he's saying..I have to wake up.
For him. Fully wake up. I hate being stuck like this with no way of talking to him. I try to wake up, but it's so frustrating!
Why can't the doctors give me something to make me wake up? I mean, it's not like I can just flip a switch and wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. I chant those words over and over in my head. WAKE...UP!!! And something happens.
My eyes..open. Wide. I can see.
There's no one in the room, and it's dark, for the exception of a tiny light coming from the wall.
I try to say something. "A..Adam.." Until I break out in a coughing fit. My throat is on fire! A nurse rushes in and checks my stats. "W..water.." I croak out. She looks at me. "One minute, please." And then walks out of the room.
Wha..where is she going?! I'm dying here! Of thirst, maybe, but come on! I just worked all day to wake up and this is how she treats me?
But then I immediately take it back when I see who she went to get. Adam. Tears sting my eyes as he hurries over. I can tell that he looks reluctant to touch me, but I'm not that fragile. Am I? I lift my arms a little, and he smiles before he grabs me in a soft hug.
My throat still hurts, however. "Water.." Adam jumps up and fills up a Dixie cup with water. It tastes like the best thing in the world.
Then it's Adam's lips on mine, and I forget that I'm even in this hospital bed. But when he pulls away, I say, "Adam..get me outta here..These drugs are crazy. I want to go home with you..let's go home.." And even though it is half the drugs talking, I mean it. But I don't understand when a sad look comes over Adam's face.
"What's wrong?" I ask. He shakes his head. "I'll talk to you about it later." One more thing I forgot. "Adam..why are you here?" He looks at me, then chuckles. "I forgot you don't remember. I uh..well, I went into shock after they took you away. I freaked out. So they decide, eh, let's put him in there, too." He tries to make the last part funny, but I can still hear the sadness in his voice.
"Adam..it's okay. I'm okay. When am I getting out of here?" I ask.
Just then a doctor comes in. "Hello, Mr. Wilkens. It's good to see you awake."
"When..when can I leave?" I ask again.
The doctor looks at me. "Well, if everything goes okay, you can leave in a week or so. Your stitches still need time to heal, and the pain would be unbearable without lots of drugs, so it's best if we keep you here."
I stare at him. A week? No..I can't do that. I want to go home. I try to get up, but I'm so weak, when Adam presses his hand against my shoulder, I can't get up. I sigh, irritated. A week. A whole week.
Adam's POV
A nurse walks in the room, right as I'm about to fall asleep. "Mr. Johnson, Matthew is awake now." I jump up and follow her to his room, but push past her. Matt is there, looking at me with confused eyes.
Tears start to fill his eyes, and I can feel mine threaten to well up. He lifts his arms, and I smile as I hug him. "Water.." I hear him croak. I jump up and get him some water. He drinks it down like it's jesus juice, hehe. Don't ask.
Matt..I press against him, our lips meeting. This is why I'm here. I love him. He's amazing. But I don't want to push him, especially since he's in a hospital bed! Raping the patients is not allowed, I would think!
"Adam..get me outta here..These drugs are crazy. I want to go home with you..let's go home.." I can hear the dopiness in his voice, from the drugs, but what he's saying sounds so good. I have to tell him about my parents. Maybe I could move in with Gus?
Matt notices. "What's wrong?" He asks.
I shake my head. "I'll talk to you about it later."
He looks up, like he just remembered something. "Adam..why are you here?"
I chuckle. "I forgot you don't remember. I uh..well, I went into shock after they took you away. I freaked out. So they decide, eh, let's put him in there, too." I try to make it sound like not such a big deal, and it's not compared to what happened..to him..I still can't believe I almost lost him.
"Adam..it's okay. I'm okay. When am I getting out of here?" he ask. Just then a doctor comes in.
"Hello, Mr. Wilkens. It's good to see you awake." Matt looks at him.
"When..when can I leave?"
The doctor responds, "Well, if everything goes okay, you can leave in a week or so. Your stitches still need time to heal, and the pain would be unbearable without lots of drugs, so it's best if we keep you here."
Matt looks devastated. He tries to get up, but I press a hand to his shoulder, and he lays back down and sighs.
One Week Later, Adam's POV
I'm on Matt's bed, talking about random things. Where we grew up, what things have been like. He tells me about Ryan, about why he started crying that night. I feel so bad. Not that bad, though. I mean, there are a lot of makeout sessions between daily medication, hehe.
Finally, Matt remembers what we were talking about. "What was wrong, that night I woke up? You said.." I shake my head..It's not important. But he's persistent. Finally, I break down.
"My parents kicked me out. I'm living with Gus, but it's only temporary, since his parents don't like me much." Matt stares at me.
"Why did they kick you out?"
"Because, Matt. I'm gay. I'm a fag. I'm not normal." I sigh, then he pulls me into a deep, intense kiss. Once again, I feel like, this is where I belong.
When he pulls away, he says, "Adam. Come live with me. I know..it's not what you're used to. I'm not rich, or..loaded or anything, but.."
I shake my head. "I can't impose on you. And Matt, it doesn't matter. I love you." Matt sits up higher.
"No, seriously. I need someone to look after me, anyways, so..Adam, will you please live with me?"
My eyes go wide as I realize he's serious. Could I? Could I really stay with him?
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Ehh, I don't like this chapter so I'm posting the next one is a second.Comment for cookies :D