What Did I Do to You to Deserve This?

2 Years On…

I don’t care what anyone says…time doesn’t heal a sodding thing. It was excruciating then to see him rip himself apart and it’s still excruciating 2 years down the line. That fateful day 2 years ago could have ended me if it wasn’t for the fact that I had Gerard. Without him I wouldn’t be here.
We’re married now. I bet your all probably thinking, ‘but your only 19...he’s much older than you’. To me, age is just a number. It shows nothing. No emotion. No feelings. It’s just…there.
“Hey babe…” I heard a soft, gentle voice say. I looked up from my book and smiled.
“Hi…”
“You okay?” he said, sitting down in the chair next to me and wrapping his arm round my shoulders. I snuggled into him and sighed.
“No…no not really…I miss him Gerard”
“I know you do…but he’s gone and we should just be happy that he’s not suffering anymore…” I sniffled, shutting my book up and pulling legs onto the chair.
“I guess so…it’s been two years and I still think he’s gonna wander in through the door with a great big smile plastered on his face with some pointless news that he thinks is awesome…and I just can’t get over the fact that he’s never gonna be here again…” I said, my voice trailing off near the end of my sentence. He pulled me onto his lap and wrapped both of his arms round my waist and kissed my cheek.
“He’s always here,” he said pointing his finger at my head and poking it gently, “and he’ll forever be in here…” he said poking my chest where my heart laid. I smiled and kissed him.
“I love you.”
“I know you do. I love you too” he smiled, tucking some of my hair behind my ear.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
“Come on! Open the door you spastic! I mean Gee…not Lily!” I collapsed into a laughing fit as Frank’s voice floated through the door. Gerard got up with a pissed look on his face. He pulled the door open rather violently and Frank flew backwards down the steps and jumping into the street as Gerard sprinted after him.
“Heya!” Mikey said, attacking me with a hug, Bob and Ray following suit. I heard the back door hit the wall and knew that my best friend and my husband had re-entered the house.
“Lily! Help me!” Frank screamed, jumping on me and knocking me to the floor.
“Get off me first!” I laughed, tears streaming down my face as Frank tried to scramble away from Gerard. Gerard pulled me up and squeezed my hand as Frank started jumping round the room.
“What is up with you?!” I giggled.
“I’m excited!” He squealed.
“What about?” I asked, confused. All the guys looked at each other.
“We’ve got something to show you…” they said together and Gerard started to push me gently out of the door.
“What have you guys done?” I asked, slightly worried and also slightly curious.

---Time Lapse---

“Guys fucking tell me where we’re going?!” I shouted, trying to pull Gerard’s hands away from my eyes.
“Will you keep your sodding knickers on?! We’re here now anyway” Bob said, pulling the handbrake on and stopping. We all piled out of the van, Gerard’s hands still stuck to my face.
“Finally!” I heard a familiar voice yell.
“Jeph?”
“Hey Lily!” he shouted, pulling me into a hug I hugged him back but Gerard still had his hands over my eyes.
“Gee please move your hands…” I giggled. He did but nothing could have prepared me for the sight that was painted in front of me.
We were in the middle of, what I gathered was nowhere, next to a huge farmhouse building. The walls were painted red apart from one which was white. The white one was covered in pictures of Bert and the rest of the lads, My Chem and me. In the middle of the pictures was a huge drawing of all of us and I knew exactly which picture it was. I was going out with Bert at the time. It was right before the tour when I first met My Chemical Romance. We hit it off right away and a randomer took the picture for us. It had been my favorite then and still was to this day.
“Oh my gosh…how? When?” I gasped, turning round and seeing the faces of eight amazing men.
“How? Solid work, beating up bastards and buying a big ass farm house in the middle of nowhere!” Quinn smiled, tugging at my shoulders and hugging me.
“When? Two years ago we kind had this idea to make a big ass memorial for the sex that is, not was, is, Bert McCracken” Mikey said. I turned to him and he just smiled and shrugged at me. He slowly walked towards me, also giving me hug but whispering in my ear.
“He’ll always be here even if we can’t see him…” I smiled into his shoulder, trying to hold back my tears.
“I don’t know what to say…it’s amazing. I never imagined anything like this!” I cried, keeling over, taking deep breaths.
“Come on…there’s more inside” Gerard said, grabbing my head and lifting my upper body up.
“There’s more?” I asked, tears still rolling down my cheeks from a mixture of emotions.
“Oh yeah…loads more!” Jeph smiled as we all walked into the barn, smiling at the wall as we all walked past…