Its In The Past, Now Lets Try And Focus On The Future - Alex Gaskarth

Three weeks and six days since Willow had stopped talking to me. Honestly I didn’t blame her, I had hurt her. I had wanted to try to talk to her but Cassadee told me to give her some space. It was already the beginning of December and tour would be ending soon. I wasn’t sure how much more space I would be able to give her.

“Alexxxxxxxxxxxxxxx!” Jack screamed through the entire bus, causing me to jump and bump my head against the top of my bunk. ‘Fuck’ I muttered and clutched my head in pain. He yanked my curtain back.

“Cassadee just invited us all to go sledding!” Jack exclaimed, “Let’s go, let’s go!” He said jumping up and down. I glared at him while I continued to rub my head.

“I’ll pass,” I said, trying to close my curtain.

“Oh no you don’t!” Jack said yanking my arm and pulling me half way out of my bunk. “Your coming and you are going to enjoy yourself.” I gave up and pulled on my winter jacket, a beanie and my black converse.

Jack, Rian, Zach and I, stood around waiting for Hey Monday and Willow. We were in Colorado and there was a decent amount of snow on the ground.

I really wasn’t looking forward to this.

As that though passed through my mind I saw Cassadee come running from behind their bus as Jersey through a snow ball at her. She ducked and it hit Jack in the back of the head. Mike and Paul came running close behind each with two huge blown up tubes in their arms. Then I saw Willow walking slower behind with Alex. Alex was holding several saucer shaped sleds, while Willow was pulling a longer purple sled that could have fit five people.

The corners of my mouth twitched as I tried not to smile at how cute she looked. Her cheeks and nose were already tinted red from the cold and she had a genuine smile on her face.

She didn’t acknowledge me at all. She attacked Jack and hugged Rian; she even gave Zach a small smile. I hung back as we all began our walk to the huge hill close to where the buses were parked.

As soon as we reached the hill, Alex pushed Willow, Jersey and Cassadee into the long purple sled and everyone laughed as they flew down the hill. Jersey was half way out of the sled, Willow was sitting on top of him and Cassadee ended up backwards. When they reached the bottom the sled slid sideways and they flew into the snow.

Jack was jumping up and down and screaming ‘me next!’ over and over. He grabbed one of the tubes and before I knew what was happening he pushed me roughly and I landed on the tube. I tried to get up but he jumped into my lap and Zach pushed us down the hill. Jack was laughing and screaming and I couldn’t see anything because he was in my way.

Before I knew it Jack was trying to stop the tube with his feet. Snow was flying everywhere and we began to swerve. Jack and I were suddenly flung from the tube. I saw Jack slide on his back for several feet. I however, began to roll and landed in a huge pile of snow. I could hear everyone laughing around me. I couldn’t hold it in any more and burst out laughing. I was now covered in snow and when Jack stood up and began to jump around because he had snow up his back. Leave it to Jack and me to fuck up sledding that bad. I looked over and saw Willow laughing at us also. That only made me smile bigger.

We had been sledding for several hours and I was currently sitting in one of the tubes, watching everyone sled down off the jump that Jack had made. Cassadee and Willow were standing in front of me laughing and watching the boys hit the jump.

She hadn’t even spoken to me, let alone looked in my direction. I was getting annoyed, but I was having a lot of fun regardless. I just wish she would at least acknowledge me. I leaned my head back against the tube and sighed.

Before I knew it someone had began to push me. I dug my heals into the snow, but they spun me sideways. I realized Jersey and Jack were doing the pushing. I was about to yell at them when someone landed in my lap.

Willow’s eyes were wide with surprise. She squealed and wrapped her arms around my neck. I looked at her and smiled, she smiled back. My happy moment was ruined when we hit the huge bump Jack made.

We both screamed as the tube flew one way and we flew the other. Willow was still holding on to me, when we hit the snow covered ground with a thud. Lucky for us we landed in a huge snow pile. I heard Willow still laughing as she unhooked her arms from my neck. My smile returned to my face.

Willow’s beautiful eyes met mine for the first time in what felt like forever. She smiled and I eagerly returned it. It was almost as if it was a silent truce between us.

~x0x~

As I clung to Alex as we flew down the hill, I couldn’t help but to forgive him. When we landed in the snow and I looked at his face I knew that it was going to be okay again. At least for the time being, anyways.

“Holy fuck,” Jack exclaimed as we reached the top of the hill. Everyone was staring at us with dropped jaws. Alex and I looked at each other than them.

“What?” We both said.

“Dude, you two went so high in the air!” Jack exclaimed, “I literally though you two were done for.” As those words left his mouth we all began to laugh again.

It felt good to be laughing again with Alex. If I wasn’t going to be able to have anything more, I really still wanted his friendship. He was way too important to me for me to completely erase from my life.