James Owen Sullivan, You Will Be Missed

My Dearest Jimmy.

No words can truly express how I am feeling; I can't believe you are really gone. I'm still in a state of shock and denial, my mind knows but my heart is still hoping that it didn't really happen. When I first heard the news I thought that it was a mistake, a misunderstand or some sort of joke; I had an image of you popping up from a hiding place and saying, 'sorry guys, false alarm,' but I knew, deep down that you would never do that to us and that it must be true. You were so full of life, Jimmy, you gave off a light, an essence, that brightened the lives of everyone around you: family, friend and fan alike. We all love you dearly and our lives will be a little dimmer now that you are gone.

With you gone it feels like the world is missing out on something special. You said it yourself: "a spoonful of Jimmy helps the whole world go down," and our world will never be the same. Even though I never got to know you personally or see you perform live (a regret I will hold for the rest of my life), I always saw that there was something special about you, and I know I missed out on something extraordinary by never getting a chance to see you perform. I will forever be grateful for the gifts that Avenged gave to the fans, with the DVDs you and guys created I can watch you play whenever I feel like it and that, in a way, is a form of comfort.

I will never understand why you were taken from us so young, you had so much to live for, so much left to do. The only thing I can think of as to why you are gone is that you were too special to be here for too long. You were so talented, I only wish I could have the musical talent you possessed in one pinky. You were an amazing musician and writer, a musical genius. Through all the hyper-activeness and craziness I could see you were a truly special human being who had so much love and acceptance within him. You taught me to not care what other people think of me, to be proud of who I am and don't make excuses for it. You are still teaching me, even through your passing, that we are only given today and our loved ones won't be here forever. You inspired me to 'seize the day' and tell my loved ones every chance I get how much they mean to me.

Your passing hit me hard, the only other death that has affected me as much was the passing of my cousin. He was twenty-four and died in a drunk driving accident six years ago. It is a tragedy to die so young, there is so much left undone, so many things left unsaid. I do have to say though; you lived your life to the fullest Jim. I read a quote somewhere that said 'some people are so afraid to die that they never begin to live,' but you lived Jimmy, and you lived your life the way you wanted. It may be selfish, but all of us down here really wish you were still with us. I cannot even imagine the pain that Leana, Brian, Matt, Zacky, Johnny and the extended Avenged family must be feeling, my thoughts are with them and with you. I know you are watching over all of us as a guardian angel. You must look beautiful in your wings.

When I make it to the afterlife, whenever that may be, I hope I get a chance to have a conversation with you and tell you how much you mean to me; and if you haven't realized it by now, I hope you know how much you are loved by all of us still down here and how tremendously you will be missed. Gone but never forgotten; you were taken to soon but will live eternally within all of us.

May you find your 'little piece of heaven' in the 'afterlife' Jim. I'll be seeing you.

Love Angie