Ignorance is Kind

"Hey!" The silence of the beautiful afternoon was broken by an oh-so-familiar voice.

I turned around and saw Jordan running towards me, a smile on his face that, for the first time in a long while, reached his eyes. He stopped when he got to be right in front of me. I arched my neck back to look up at him, a smile setting itself on my face. "Hi," I replied.

Jordan tugged my backpack from my shoulder and slung it over his own. Then he looped his arm together with mine and we began to walk. "How was detention?" he asked.

I sighed. "Uneventful. What were you still doing at school?"

"Waiting for you, silly." He grinned.

I looked up at him, brow furrowing. "Why were you waiting for me exactly?"

"So we could walk home together. Duh."

"Well, ya know..." He let the sentence trail off, a grin still covering his face. "Wanna hang out tonight? You don't really have a choice, by the way. I already called Zack and told him," he finished.

"Thank you for planning my weekend."

"It was no trouble at all. But seriously, do you wanna hang out tonight?"

"I thought I didn't have a choice." I raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I decided that I would be nice and give you the choice of having a choice, even though you don't really have a choice."

I blinked up at him. "Now that that's settled... I don't really want to be home tonight anyways," I said, thinking of who would end up at my house that night. "I'm all yours, Jordy."

When we'd arrived at Jordan's house, his parents had told us that they were going out and would just love it if we could watch Jordan's baby sister Abby. Jord didn't seem too thrilled about the new agenda, but I happened to adore the little kid.

I laid the sleeping two-year-old in her crib, trying with all my might not to wake her. They weren't lying when they called it the Terrible Twos. "I love your sister, Jordan," I whispered as we left her room, "but was it absolutely necessary to give her chocolate ice cream?"

"She was hungry! What else was I supposed to give her?" he asked, holding the door to his bedroom open for me.

"Hm, I don't know. Crackers?"

I sat down on his bed and stared at him, waiting for an answer. He walked over and sat next to me. "She hates crackers. She whines whenever I give them to her."

I put my hand on his. "You have been manipulated by a toddler, my dear friend."

Jordan turned his hand so that it was clenched tightly together with mine. I leaned against his arm and wished there was something I could do to make myself have feelings for him. He deserved that; someone who loved him, and I dearly wished that I could be that person. Whenever I even tried, though, another face would pop into my head.

"You know those secret admirer things you've been getting?"

I looked up at him. "Yeah?"

"I know who they're from."

"Jordan, are you serious? Who is it?"

"You really wanna know?"

"Of course I do!" I exclaimed. "Whoever it is, is the sweetest person ever."

He stared down at me and I suddenly felt self conscious. His blue eyes, which looked brighter when coupled with the bright green of his hair, burned into my own and I knew what he was going to say before he voiced the words.

"It's me," he said quietly.

For lack of a better response, I sighed. "Oh, Jordan." I leaned my head against him again and felt everything he wanted to say; everything he was feeling. And I was scared. What could I say back to him? Jordan was my best friend. I wasn't willing to allow our friendship to be ruined over something as trivial as that.

"I know you don't like me like that," he began. "But could we maybe try? Please?"

I heard the plea in his voice and saw it in his eyes when I, once again, looked at his face. In that moment, I knew we could try. And I knew that it would work. I could see it in my mind; him and I together. Jordan was my age, had many of the same interests as me; I needed to get my mind away from my unhealthy attraction to him. Jordan could help with that.

Looking down at our still intertwined fingers, I squeezed his hand tightly with my own. "Okay."