Light Me On Fire

When the weekend came, Kelsi had decided we needed a girls day,
inviting Becca, Alaska, who had been spending a lot of time with Jared
lately, and myself over to her house for movies, junk food, and of
course, make overs.

I threw on a pair of grey sweats and a green v-neck tee shirt before
slipping my feet into a pair of white TOMS. I grabbed my phone and
headed downstairs. Both of my parents had already gone to work, so I
locked the door behind me and went to my car. I lit up a cigarette
before backing out of the driveway and starting my route to Kelsi's
house.

Things between John and I had only been awkward since he told me of
his crush on Becca. And my friendship with Becca was also awkward. I
didn't have any problem with her, but my jealousy of having John like
her just made me want to distance myself from her. Although I felt
like a shitty person for treating her coldly, I couldn't help myself.

Kelsi had guessed something was up, but I refused to tell her of the
real reason I wasn't being too kindly to Becca. I, instead, made up a
lie and said nothing was wrong, but she could see though that.
However, she chose not to badger me about it, and I was grateful for
that.

After pulling in and parking in her driveway, I got out and made my
way to her front door, knocking twice.

"Finally you made it," Kelsi smirked.

"Shut up. I overslept," I told her, walking into her living room.

"I see sleeping later didn't put your grouchy ass in a better mood."

"Suck my dick."

She laughed and we headed down to her basement, where I saw Becca and
Alaska eating slices of pizza.

"Hey," I mumbled, plopping myself down on the couch.

"Hey, Soph," Becca said warily before taking a bite of her pie.

"Hola, Sophia," Alaska smiled.

In the short time I had known Alaska, I learned that she was much like
myself; loud and out there, which automatically made me like her.

"Soph's got her thong stuck up her ass," Kelsi joked, taking a seat on
the floor with them.

"I do not. Grab me a slice?" I asked, batting my lashes at her.

She grabbed two pieces and placed them on a paper plate before handing
it to me. "There you go, bitch."

"Thanks, trick," I smiled.

Alaska laughed. "So what movie are we going to watch first?"

"I vote Donnie Darko," Becca stated.

I rolled my eyes. "I've seen that movie like a hundred times. It's one
of John's favorites."

"Really? It's one of mines, too!" she cheered, obviously not catching
onto my eye rolling.

Kelsi gave me a look. "What about you, Alaska?"

The brunette shrugged. "I personally love The Hangover."

I smiled. "I love that movie, too."

"The Hangover work for you, Beccs?" Kelsi asked.

She nodded her head. "Fine with me."

Kelsi stood up and walked to her DVD shelf, grabbing the movie. I took
a bite of my pepperoni pizza and waited as she put the disc in, the
previews starting.

"Okay, before we really get into the movie, I have to ask, has Jared
said anything about me?" Alaska asked, looking at us.

"Just that he really likes hanging out with you," Becca said.

"He wants to get it in and then some," I laughed, causing her to laugh
as well.

"He likes you. It's obvious," Kelsi added before picking up her slice
of pizza.

"Really!?" Alaska asked, her doe eyes brightening up.

I nodded my head. "It's true. The boy is smitten over you."

She gave a flustered smile. "Thanks for the info."

"I wish Garrett would make a move and ask me out already," Becca sighed.

"Garrett's shy when it comes to that sort of thing. Especially after
his break up with Hayley. They were together for two years, and out of
nowhere, she tells him that she's interested in some douche at ASU and
breaks up with him," Kelsi told her.

"Poor, Gare," Becca pouted.

"Seriously. That Hayley chick sounds like a whore," Alaska stated.

I got up from the couch and joined them on the floor, figuring this
would be a good opportunity to ask Becca about John. "So, Becca, what
do you think about John?"

She gave an odd look. "What do you mean?"

"I mean just what I asked, what do you think about him?"

"He's a nice guy. He's a good friend. Why?"

I shrugged. "You don't think he's cute?"

"Well ... He's obviously attractive, yeah, but I like Garrett," she
told me.

I took notice of how she didn't say she didn't like him. I arched my
brows. "So you don't like him?"

"Not really, Sophie. Why?" she sighed, her tone gaining an annoyed edge.

"I was just asking."

"That's not something you just ask," she said.

"Well I just did." Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Kelsi and
Alaska looking uncomfortable.

"Look, Sophie, all week you've been giving me the cold shoulder. Did I
do something to you?" Becca questioned, looking agitated.

I was getting agitated with her myself. "Nothing that you're
personally responsible for."

"What the hell does that even mean?"

"You might wanna take your tone down a bit," I warned.

She threw down her slice of pizza and stood up. "I don't have to do
anything. I'm sick of your attitude!"

Alaska chewed idly on her pizza, looking between the both of us as I
stood up. Kelsi, however, looked ready to intervene.

"I don't give a fuck what you're sick of."

She glared at me. "Why don't you just fucking tell me what I did."

I clenched my jaw. "I just need you to stay away from John."

She arched her brows. "What? I don't even like him that way, Sophia.
You know how I feel about Garrett."

"Whatever. John told me he likes you," I blurted.

Her eyes widened, as did Alaska's and Kelsi's. "W - what?"

"He fucking likes you," I seethed before grabbing my keys and running
upstairs, and outside.

I leaned against my car and put my head in my hands. I knew I was
being a complete and utter bitch, but I couldn't help myself. Liking
John had turned me into a psychotic girl.

As if right on cue, my phone began ringing, and as I glanced down at
the screen, I saw John's name pop up on the screen.

"What?" I answered, still annoyed with myself.

"Can you cone pick me up?" he asked, and by the edge in his voice, I
could tell he wasn't too happy either.

"Why? I thought you and the guys were hanging out today?"

"We were. Look, just come pick me up at Kennedy's, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Give me ten minutes," I told him before hanging up.

I got in my car and began making my way to Kennedy's, my mind racing a
million miles per hour. I knew there was no way Kelsi could have
called and told him about Becca and I's squabble so quickly. Something
must have happened between him and the guys and I silently prayed that
Eric hadn't opened his mouth about my secret.

Pulling into the driveway, I saw Kennedy and John sitting on the front
steps, John's face red and swollen and his shirt looking like it had
been stretched. A pissed off look decorated his face, while Kennedy's
looked surprised.

"What the fuck happened to you?" I asked, walking up to them.

"Nothing," John seethed, standing up. "Let's go." He grabbed my hand
and began pulling me to my car. I looked at Kenny who shook his head
and waved at me. "Where are your keys?" he asked.

"Right here," I told John, holding my keys up.

He grabbed them and got in the driver's seat of the car. I stared
perplexed at him for a moment before walking to the passenger's side
and getting in. As soon as my door shut, John sped away from Kennedy's
house.

"What the hell, John?!" I yelled, being jerked forward from the speedy
movement of the car.

"Sorry," he mumbled, easing his foot off the gas. "We're going to my
house," he told me.

I didn't say anything, but crossed my arms over my chest as he drove.
The radio filled the silence between us as we rode to his house.
Pulling to the front, John parked the car and we both got out.

He opened the door and stepped inside, me following behind him. I shut
the door and as I turned back around, I nearly had a heart attack.
Lynn, John's mother, was standing right behind me, her hazel eyes
twinkling with happiness, matching the smile on her face.

"Sophia! Where have you been hiding?" she teased, pulling me into a hug.

"I've just been busy with school. I'm sorry I haven't stopped by in
awhile," I apologized.

"Just make sure it doesn't happen again! Would you like something to
drink?"

I shook my head. "No, thanks, Mama O. I'm just gonna head up to John's
room."

She nodded her head and mumbled something about cookies before walking
away. I made my way up the steep stairs, feeling tired as I reached
the top. With a large sigh, I knocked on John's door. He opened it,
not saying a word to me before going and sitting down on his bed. I
shut the door behind me as I walked in, and took a seat on the floor,
John's legs right beside me.

"Why are you sitting on the floor?" he asked, his voice no longer
sounding angry.

"I don't know. But what the hell just happened to you? You're lucky
you slipped by before your mom came in the room."

He sighed and glanced at himself in the full length mirror that hung
on the wall right in front of his bed. "Nick and I got into a fight."

My head snapped in his direction. "Nick!? Why!?"

"It's a long story, Soph."

"I don't give a shit. What happened!?"

He patted the space next to him on the bed and I rolled my eyes as I
got off the ground and took a seat next to him. "Do you remember the
other day when I told you I liked Becca?" I nodded my head. "I lied."
I felt my heart drop. I had just been bitching at my friend for no
reason.

"What - what do you mean you lied?"

He licked his lips, glancing at everything but me. As I studied his
face, I could see his swollen bottom lip and a bruise beginning to
form under his right eye. "If I tell you the truth, you can't act
freaked out, because you're asking me for it, okay?"

"Okay, John."

With a long pause, he looked to the ground. "Soph, I like you."

I felt my heart stop at his words. I had to have misheard him. "You
what?"

"I like you. As in ... More than a friend."

The room suddenly looked as if it were spinning and I felt my legs go
weak. My throat suddenly felt too dry and my heartbeat was sounding in
my ears. I stared at John, who looked up at me and I opened my mouth,
going to say something, but instead, closed it.

He sighed, clearly frustrated. "Look, you asked for the truth and I
told it to you. Nick was getting on me about Becca and when Garrett
heard that, he got pissed and started bitching at me. Then Eric said
something and Nick started asking me questions that were none of his
business about our friendship and I just lost it. I ended up blurting
out my feelings for you and the next thing I know, we're rolling
around on the floor."

I shook my head, backing away from him. "John," I whispered, afraid
to speak because in my heart, I felt the same way for him.

He stood up and backed me against his wall, cupping my face in his
large hands. "I was a fool to ever let you go. I didn't see it then
and I'm regretting it now. It kills me to see you with my best friend,
because I feel that it should be my hand you hold and my lips you
kiss, Sophia," he told me, using my full name. His green pools
traveled to my lips as his thumb traced them.

My body went into complete shock then, along with my mind. My eyes
lingered over John's face, taking in all of his features. His green
irises, tanned skin, light brown freckles, his adorable nose, and
lastly, his thin, pink lips. God, he was perfect in every way.

"Please say something, Sophie," he whispered, his warm breath tickling
my skin.

I didn't say anything. I let my actions speak for themselves as I
gripped the back of his head with my right hand and pulled his face
closer to me, connecting our lips. It took him a second to kiss back,
but he did.

He kissed me back and I swear, there was nothing in the world that had
ever been able to make me feel the way I did the minute his tongue
slipped into my mouth.

It was like a crack addict getting their fix; a three year old getting
a new toy; a writer completing a novel; a singer making a hit. I felt
everything at once.

And, the saddest part was, I wished I hadn't.