All These Things I Hate

"Come on Bre, just try it on!" Val whined while holding up a skirt. Val was like a sister to me. She has been dating my brother for a few years now and every day since I've known her she keeps pushing the girly image in me. You can see how annoyed I am with her.

"Val, please. I like my clothes. Can I just go one day without you trying to change me?" I asked.

"She does have a point."Cassandra said defending me. Cassandra, Cassie for short, was my best friend ever. She defends me when people say bad things. She has amazing tattoos. Across her shoulders it said The Night Has A Thousand Eyes; The Day Has Only One and on the right side of her rib cage is a picture of a wolf howling at night and on her foot is a Rose winding up her calf. They were all just awesome tattoos. She's just an all around awesome person.

"See, Cassie understands. Why can't you just get that I don't want to wear a skirt or put on make up?" I asked.

"Fine! I give up. Just don't come crawling to me when you're lonely and when you want a boyfriend." She said walking out of my bedroom door.

"Why dose she make it seem like it's a life or death situation?" I asked Cassie. She sat down on the bed next to me and her leg began to bounce her leg instantly. She's done this for as long as I can remember. It used to bother me a lot but I barely notice it anymore. Sometimes I even catch myself doing it. But only when I'm either nervous or in trouble.

"I don't know. It makes no sense to me. Hasn't she been at this for years?" She asked. I nodded and sighed. Then I heard running coming up the stairs and I knew right then and there that I would be left alone. Jimmy came in like a bat out of hell and picked up Cassie and started kissing her. I made a gagging sound and turned my gaze away from the two.

"Aw! Don't be like that Bre. I've got love for you to!" Jimmy said letting go of Cassie and picking me up in a giant bear hug.

"Jimmy put me down! I can't breath!" I said kicking my legs. He laughed and set me down. Then Jimmy picked Cassie back up and ran out the door. I sighed and fell back onto my bed.

"Oh my god! You're going to pose for Playboy? Why didn't you tell me!" I looked up and saw Brian standing in my doorway. I put my head back down and flipped him off. "Oh don't be like that know you love me." He said while sitting down next to me.

"Brian, must I hit you upside the head again? Come back to reality! You're not as great as you make yourself seem." I said sitting up.

"But that's where you're wrong my friend. I'm perfect." He said smiling. I laughed at him and pushed him off the bed. "What was that for?" He asked.

"I just pushed you off your high and mighty mind setting." I laughed. He made a fake pout and crossed his arms over his chest. "Oh would you get over yourself?" I scuffed.

"You're mean Bre! I'm telling!" He said as he ran out of my room. I got up and shut the door. I just wanted some peace and quiet. I plopped back down on my bead and turned my radio on. Blink 182's Party Song blasted through the speakers. I closed my eyes and let the music soak in. Music calmed me down like nothing else. It was then that my bedroom door opened. I came little Johnny.

"Hi Bre!" He said as he sat down on my bed. Looks like quiet time is out of the question. I turned my stereo back off.

"Hey." I said laying back down.

"What's wrong?" He asked as he turned his head to the side.

"Nothing, I just have a head ache." I replied back. He nodded and we sat in silence for a minute. "Wanna go down stairs?" I asked him. He nodded and we both went out the door and down to the living room where everyone was. Jimmy and Cassie were in a heavy make out session. I quickly averted my eyes. Brian was whining to my brother about what I did, which caused Matt and Val to laugh at him. Then there was Zacky. So many emotions I felt towards him. Resentment, hatred, and attraction. I sighed as I went into the kitchen to get a snack. I looked through the fridge and pulled out a container of blueberry yogurt. I then sat on the counter and started to eat it.

"Breanna." Matt said coming into the room.

"What? I didn't do it!"

"Why do you have to be so mean to Brian?" He asked in a loud tone.

"Are you serious?"

"Not really, he paid me twenty bucks to talk to you. So there I talked to you." He smiled while leaning against the counter next to me.

"You're such a dork." I laughed.

"Hey, it's twenty bucks!"

"Oh my god, you're such a whore!" I laughed even harder. I finished my yogurt and threw the container away. "Well, I'm going back to my room." I said while hopping off the counter.

"What for? You never do anything! all you do is sit in your room and listen to music. I always thought that a sister would involve waiting forever to use the bathroom because you're too busy making yourself pretty when you're ready before I am. I thought that I would have to beat the shit out of guys that break your heart. But you don't even try."

"Why do you have a problem with me?" I asked trying to keep myself calm.

"Because I don't want you to end up alone." He said with worry in his eyes.

"Maybe I have no hope in the first place. That's why I don't try." I whispered. I then walked out of the room and headed towards the stairs. I then caught my foot on something and fell face first towards the floor. I looked up and saw it was Zacky smirking down at me. I didn't say a word and I headed straight to my room. I would usually argue with him or hit him but I just don't feel like fighting with him anymore. I'm sick of the bullshit. Right before I got to my door I heard foot steps following me. I continued into my room and shut the door. Almost instantly the door opened. I didn't look up from the book that I was reading not caring who it was.

"What the hell was that?" Zacky asked walking fully into my room. I continued to ignore him and read my book.

"Hey! I'm fucking talking to you!" He yelled.

"That's nice." I replied without moving my gaze from the page.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He asked.

"You." I replied. I allowed my gaze to look at his face. It was completely red with anger. "I never did a damn thing to you and yet you still feel the need to push me around. So I came up with a solution, I'm not going to acknowledge your existence any longer. Goodbye." I said going back to reading my book.

"No."

"No what?"

"I'm not leaving." He replied crossing his arms over his chest.

"Get the hell out!" I yelled. He smirked and shook his head.

"You're so pathetic. No wonder you never had a boyfriend. You're too ugly to get anyone. I feel so sorry for Matt. He stuck with you."

"Get out now." I whispered as tears built up in my eyes. He laughed as he left my room. I crashed down on my bed, turning the music back on and started sobbing into my pillow.

I show him that I can be beautiful.