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"Beck?" There was a timid knock at my bedroom door. "You okay?"

"I'm fine, Matt. Come in."

The door opened and Matt's concerned face appeared. "I can hear your music from all the way in the kitchen. I haven't heard you play that song in a long time."

I was stretched out across my mattress, listening to an old Foo Fighters album. The melody of Everlong was filtering through the speakers. I sat up and looked up at my best friend.

"And what's wrong with this song?"

Matt shrugged, but his eyes were still intent. "Nothing's wrong with the song. I just remember that you had an obsession with it back when Josh went into rehab. It was playing everytime I came over."

"I really love this song."

"Tell me what's wrong. Are you still worked up over Josh getting famous and leaving you behind? I thought we dealt with that already."

I fell back against the blankets dramatically. "No, that's not it. I talked to Josh about that after our date the other night. A girl wanted his body at the movie theatre and I had an issue with it. But I'm alright with it now. I think."

Matt sighed and sat down beside me. "Well I don't think so."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "And you're drawing this conclusion because I'm listening to a song?"

"No, I think that because you haven't left your room all day. You missed The Price Is Right. I had to yell at the TV all by myself."

I laughed. "I'm really okay, Matt. I just wanted some time to think about a few things."

"Such as?"

"Well Josh, for starters. And everyone else. How's the new music coming?"

"Don't change the subject. I really want to know what's up."

The phone rang, and I leapt up. I bolted off the bed past Matt. "Saved by... someone. Someone that loves me," I mumbled as I raced out to the living room.

"You're not off the hook!" Matt called after me.

"I beg to differ!" I yelled back, picking up the cordless receiver. "Hello?" I answered the phone without even looking at the Caller ID.

"Becky!" Markie squealed. "I love you, you know that, right?"

"What do you want. Markie?"

"Where's the trust? Who says I want something from you?"

"Everything that I know about you says that you want something. I'm kind of strapped for cash at the moment, though. Payday isn't until Friday."

She sighed heavily. "Do you really think that little of me? I don't need money, Becky. I need your permission."

I paused, sitting lightly on the edge of the couch. "Permission? What could I possibly give you permission for?"

"Well," she hesitated. I could practically see her chewing on her bottom lip as she contemplated how to properly word her request.

"Come on, Markie, you can ask me whatever you want. There's no guarantee that I'll say yes, but you can go ahead and ask."

"I want to start dating Ian," she said bluntly.

"I... What?" I faltered, sitting up straighter. I was certain that I hadn't heard her right. "I didn't think the two of you were close. Since when do you even really talk to him?"

"Uh, since always," she retorted. "Where the hell have you been?"

"In Vancouver!" I almost yelled back. "How did I miss this?"

"Wait, hold on," Markie used a slow, deliberate tone. She sounded as if she were reasoning with an infant. "I'm not talking about the Ian that's in the band."

"Then who are you-" I stopped short as I understood. "Oh." I said simply. She wasn't referring to Ian the drummer, she meant the Ian that I'd dated in Edmonton.

"He started coming around the store awhile ago," she explained. "He started asking about you. He wanted to know if you were still with that guy that you left him for. I said that you had moved to Vancouver to be with him, and that the two of you are really happy together. At first he seemed a little sad, but then he said that he was happy for you. He keeps coming in and buying stuff, and everytime he comes in we get really flirtatious. I know, I'm like that with every guy, but I think this is different. Now that I know for sure that Matt isn't going for my bait, I think I'm ready to move on. And I always thought that Ian was cute. He's going back to school to become a Phys Ed teacher. He asked me to go to a movie with him tomorrow night, and I told him I'd let him know. I felt like I needed a green light from you first. I mean, your best friend's ex is usually off-limits. But you left him because of Josh, and you have Josh now, so I thought that maybe-"

"Markie," I cut her off. She was speaking too fast for me to keep up. I had really liked Ian, but she was right. I had Josh now. And even if something were to happen with him, I was never planning to move back to Edmonton. It would be stupid to prevent Markie from dating Ian. She deserved to be happy, too. "You don't need my permission to date a guy that you have a crush on. But if it helps you sleep at night, I'm totally okay with you going out with him. Have fun, and call me with all the details afterward. I'd like to know how he's doing. Tell him that I say hi."

"Are you sure? I can still back out if you're not okay with it."

I laughed a bit at her concern. "Markie, it's cool. I promise, I'm alright with it. Go for it."

"You're the best! I'm going to call him right now!"

"Good luck!"

She hung up, and I sat in silence for a long moment. If she and Ian got serious, would things be awkward when we all got together? But I wanted Markie to find someone that she liked. I didn't want her to get depressed again. It frightened me when she was like that.

"Who was on the phone?" Matt asked, walking into the room and turning on the television.

"Markie."

"How is she?" He didn't seem genuinely interested. It felt like he was just humoring me.

"She's good. She has a date tomorrow. Matt, can I ask you something?"

He looked over at me. "Of course, Beck. What's bugging you? Is this about Josh?"

I shook my head. "Not everything is about Josh. This is about you. Where have you been lately?"

"What do you mean? I haven't been gone any more than usual."

"No, you haven't, but you're avoiding the topic. You used to tell me where you were going. Now you just say that you're going out with Steve somewhere. Don't get me wrong, I'm okay with the fact that you have secrets. You don't have to tell me everything. I'm just curious. I want to know why you're suddenly so secretive."

Matt turned back to the TV. He flicked the channel a few times before he sighed. "I've been out with Shannon," he admitted finally. His voice was low.

I froze. Of all the possibilities that I'd imagined, this hadn't been one of them. Shannon hadn't been her usual, talkative self since Matt had been so uninterested on their first date. She hadn't mentioned him to me since then. I had assumed that the threat was over.

"Huh?" I asked dumbly, certain that I had some kind of earwax buildup that had hindered my hearing.

"Well, not out, exactly," he corrected himself.

"You've been in with her? Is that supposed to make me feel better? Were you ever going to tell me?"

"Probably not. I was kind of planning on getting a real girlfriend and moving on before you could find out."

"She hasn't mentioned it, either," I muttered, more to myself than to him.

"I asked her not to."

"She's just an overexcited fan, you know."

"We all have our own ways of dealing with them," he smirked. I knew he was only joking, but I couldn't bring myself to see any humor.

"I'm going to go back to my room, okay? I need to check my email and stuff." I numbly got to my feet, trying to process what I'd just been told.

"Beck," Matt stood up and reached out for me. "Are you mad at me?"

I shook my head. "No. I'm kind of surprised, but I'm okay. Just don't bring her here, alright? I'd rather she didn't know where I live. Or where I sleep. Keep your business at her place."

"If you're not cool with this-"

"I seem to be able to handle a lot of things today. You're no exception. Just be careful, okay? I still don't trust her farther than I can throw her. And that's probably only, like, two feet."

Matt's eyes fell to the floor. I hoped that he understood that I was only worried about him, but I found that I had no energy left for talking. Soon enough I was sprawled out on my mattress again. I grabbed my stereo remote and hit the play button, then closed my eyes and listened to the familiar chords.

Sometimes, a song was all I needed to escape. If only for approximately three and a half minutes.