I Love the Way That She Breathes

I woke up to my alarm, one of Ronnie's songs. I sat up and looked around. I still had his clothes on the floor from the last night he spent here. I looked at my phone, realizing what day today is. It's our three year anniversary. I got ready for work in a black dress with red on the trim and the top. I straightened my hair and put on my make up. I put on red Chuck Taylors and grabbed my purse, my phone in hand. I noticed a note on my dresser.

Happy Anniversary, baby. I've loved you three years today. I"ll be calling you later.

I smiled, tears in my eyes. I don't know how he got this here, but I'm glad. He probably got Nason or someone to do it. I went into the fridge and got a yogurt out. I ate it quickly before grabbing my keys and walking out of the apartment, locking the door, which had a note attached to it. I locked the door and smiled. He left me another note.

Radke's bitch, give me what I want, or there will be terrible consequences.

I gasped and threw the note down. I looked around and saw no one. I walked quickly to my car and locked the door, but not before checking the back seat. I drove to work with Dying Is Your Latest Fashion on. Jessica was locking her car as I pulled up.

"Hey Norah!" she called.

I smiled and walked over to her.

"How are you doing today?" she asked.

I shrugged, "I'm holding up. It's our three year today."

She nodded, "Wow. It's been a long time."

I nodded, "We were really only together two because for almost the last year he's been high."

We walked into work and Max was standing there, talking to our boss. I froze.

"Ladies, this is Max from Escape The Fate. He's gonna be working with one of our bands today. Max, this is Jessica Cunningham and Norah Montgomery."

His head shot up at my name and he looked at me. He knew what today was.

"It's nice to meet you both," he said, a pained smile on his face.

"You, too," Jessica said.

"Great to meet you, Max," I choked out.

"Well, Jessica, I want you at the desk today. Norah, you'll be assisting the band and Mr. Green."

I looked at him as he walked away. Jessica looked at me.

"Explain it to him. Please get him to switch it," I whispered in her ear.

She nodded and walked over to the desk. I led Max to one of our recording studios.

"So," Max cleared his throat, "How's Ronnie?"

"Not like you care," I hissed, "You and Craig have been talking shit about him."

"I haven't--"

"If I can stay clean I can stay with my band? Really Max? You had just as much of a drug problem as he did. He just got in some shit."

"Norah, I'm sorry."

We got into the studio, where Craig was sitting. I froze.

"How's your boyfriend?" he asked, snidely.

"Oh my god," I gasped, "I can't do this."

I flew out of the room and ran to my desk, where Jessica and Mr. Ottello were talking.

"Please, can I be at the desk and Jessica go in there? Craig is in there, too."

"What's going on, Norah?"

"My boyfriend is the ex lead singer of their band. I can't be in there right now," I said.

He nodded, "Sure. Norah, you can stay at the desk."

I sighed in relief, "Thank you so much."

He nodded and walked with Jessica to the recording studio. I sat down at my desk and got my phone out of my purse. I immediately texted Nason.

Almost had to work with Craig and Max!

I put the phone on the desk and started working. A few minutes later, my phone vibrated.

They're at your job? I'm on the way!

No! I'm not trying to get fired any time soon!

My boss came over and handed me a few folders.

"Can I talk to you?" he asked.

I nodded, "Yes, sir."

"Your boyfriend is Ronnie Radke?" he asked.

I nodded, "He is."

"How's he doing? I know he's in jail."

"He's doing good," I said, "He's going to NA meetings and getting everything he needs to get done."

Mr. Ottello nodded, "That's good. I'm sorry that I asked you to go to in there."

I shook my head, "It's fine, you didn't know. We don't hide our relationship but we don't flaunt it either, so if people don't follow Escape The Fate, they don't really know."

He nodded, "Okay, well, if you need help with anything, just let me know."

I smiled, "Thank you, sir."

He smiled back and went back to the recording studio. I picked up my phone to see Nason's text.

I know, I'm just kidding. Call me later?

Sure!

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At about two, my phone started ringing. I picked it up and heard the automatic message thing from the prison. I pressed all the buttons to get me to Ronnie.

"Helloooo baby girl!" I heard him sing on the other end of the phone.

I giggled, butterflies flapping around in my stomach, "Hi, baby."

Jessica looked up at me with a smile. I smirked.

"Happy anniversary, baby girl."

"Happy anniversary, Ronnie."

"What are you gonna do for our anniversary?" he asked.

"I don't know, cry because I can't see you?"

"Babe! No crying!"

I giggled, "Okay, no crying."

"Norah, you know I love you."

"What did you do now, Ronnie?" I asked with a smirk.

He chucked, "Nothing, baby. I was just thinking about you today and I started thinking about the last time I came home before I tried to come home for good."

"When Jess was at the apartment?"

"Yep."

"Why'd you start thinking about that?"

"I don't know. It made me feel like shit, though."

"Baby, it's okay. I forgive you."

"I'm so glad you forgive me, Norah, you have no idea."

"Ronnie, I love you. I know if you were in the right state of mind, you wouldn't have left me so many times."

"Never. I would have stayed and held you for so much longer."

I smiled, "I gotta finish some work, when can you call me next, baby?"

"If not later today, probably in like two days."

I smiled, "Okay, babe. I love you."

"I love you, too, baby girl, so much. I can't wait to see you."

"I'm trying to come visit you, baby. But I'm working much later lately, there's just so much. And then I come home and pass out."

"I understand, baby."

"I love you, Ronnie."

"I love you, too, baby girl."

I put my phone down and saw Jessica staring at me, "What?" I asked.

"What bad thing was he thinking about?" she asked.

"The first time you met him," I smirked.

She groaned, "Ugh, I felt like such a fangirl, Norah!"

I laughed, "Why?"

"Because I work with musicians everyday. But Ronnie Radke walks into your apartment and I freaked out!"

I continued laughing, "I'm sorry!"

A few minutes later, Mr. Ottello walked passed us with Max and Craig in tow. Max slipped a piece of paper on my desk, stared at me with hard, emotionless eyes, and continued walking. I looked at Jessica, who was watching Craig walk past. I stared at her, disbelievingly. She looked at me and jumped.

"What? I'm sorry. That boy is sexy."

I rolled my eyes and grabbed the piece of paper that Max handed me.

Stupid bitch.

I scoffed and threw it away. This is the beginning of some petty bullshit, I'm sure of it.

~

"What movie do you wanna watch?"

I looked up from my mac & cheese at Jessica. She was standing by my entertainment center, looking at all of the movies Ronnie and I share collectively.

"Nothing too romantic. Maybe just a comedy."

"How does Lost Boys sound?"

"Perfect. Put it in."

I put the bowl in the dishwasher and sat down on the couch, stretching out under a Nightmare Before Christmas blanket. Jessica was on the love seat, her legs curled under her.

-----------------------------

About halfway into the movie, someone was knocking at the door. Jessica looked at me, confused. We both walked over to the door. I unlocked it and opened it to see Ronnie on the other side. I knew Jessica was watching me.

He smiled at me from his place of leaning against the door frame, "Hey baby girl."

"Go in my room," I said to him, causing him to flinch at my tone.

He walked in and kissed my forehead, then walked into my room. I looked at Jessica, who was staring at where Ronnie had just gone, with wide eyes.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

She looked at me, "Ronnie Radke just walked into your apartment. And he kissed you. What the fuck is going on?"

I shut the door, "Um, he's the boyfriend I've been telling you about."

Her eyes almost popped out of her head, "That is so fucking cool!"

I smirked, "Not really, you've heard my problems."

"How'd you meet him?"

"My friend hooked us up, she's dating Robert from the band."

"That's so crazy!"

I nodded, "I'm gonna go see what he wants. You can leave the movie on."

Jessica sat back down and I walked down the hall to my room. Ronnie was sitting on the foot of the bed. I shut the door and stood in front of him, my arms crossed over my chest. We stared at each other for a few minutes. I was looking at his eyes, and he was looking anywhere but in my eyes.

"Why are you here?" I finally asked.

He looked at me confused, "I live here."

"I haven't seen you here in months, Ronnie. What do you want?"

He sighed, but stayed silent for a few minutes.

"Ronnie, what do you want? You can't just walk in here and expect me not to question it!"

"I don't want you to sleep alone tonight," he whispered.

"What's so different about tonight, Ronnie? I sleep alone every other night! Because you think that I can sleep sound with you running all over Vegas with this problem?! I barely sleep anymore!"

"Do you want the truth?" he asked, running a hand through his hair.

"Do you know the truth, Ronnie?"

"Goddammit, Norah, it's because I miss you!"

I stared at him, "What? No. That's not fair, Ronnie. You don't get to miss me. You made this happen!"

"Norah, why is that so hard to believe?!"

"If you really missed me, you would stop!"

"I'm not doing anything!"

"Don't give me this bullshit!"

"It was hard for me to say that and you're saying it's bullshit?!"

"It's hard for you to tell me you miss me?! We've been together for two years!"

"It is hard!"

"You'd think I know you by now!"

"Maybe you don't!"

I gasped. My hand flew to my mouth as if he had hit me. He watched me carefully, gauging my reaction.

"So, you've either been lying to me for two years, or you're so far gone, even you don't know who you are."

His eyes widened as tears fell down my cheeks.

"No, baby," he said, all anger gone from his voice.

He grabbed me and pulled me onto his lap, holding me tightly. I wrapped my arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder. He rubbed my back and whispered in my ear how much he loved me and how sorry he is.

I took a deep breath. He still smells like my Ronnie. I ran the tip of my nose along his neck, making a shiver run through him. That still affects him like he's my Ronnie.

"I'm still here," he whispered, "Don't think I don't know what you're doing."

I picked my head up off his shoulder and he rested our foreheads together.

"Stay with me," I whispered.

"Norah, I--"

"Please, Ronnie. I'm so tired of sleeping alone. I love you and I miss you. I need you."

He looked so torn and heartbroken. He moved his mouth toward mine. I quickly pressed our lips together. I heard Ronnie gasp as I shifted my hips and straddled him. I kissed down his face and trailed my lips down to his neck. As I sucked and bit his neck, his grip on my hips got tighter and his breathing got heavier. I sucked hard on his neck, making him let out a strangled breath.

"Your friend is out there," he panted.

I looked up into his eyes, "Are you really trying to stop me when I can feel what I did to you?"

I moved my hips, making him choke on a breath.

"I don't have much self control left," he whispered.

I smiled, looking down at him, "That was my plan," I whispered, lowering my lips to meet his.

-----------------------------

"Let's go back out there. I feel bad leaving Jessica alone."

I felt Ronnie shift and I looked up at him. He smiled down at me.

"Okay. Is she gonna rape me? Cause I saw how she looked at me when I opened the door."

I smirked, "I think I marked my territory already."

He laughed and unwrapped me from his arms. We both got up and I put my clothes in the hamper. I grabbed one of Ronnie's old shirts and a pair of boy short underwear. As I pulled on plaid pajama bottoms, I turned around and saw Ronnie fully dressed, skinny jeans and all.

"Are you leaving?" I asked as I pulled my long hair into a messy bun.

He shook his head, kissing me quickly, "Nope, just felt like putting my jeans back on."

I smiled and grabbed his hand. We walked back into the living room and saw that Lost Boys was almost over.

"Aw, damn," Ronnie sighed, "I wanted to watch that."

He smirked down at me when I squeezed his hand.

"Wanna watch Lion King?"

I shook my head at Jessica's question.

"Why?" two voices asked.

I smirked, "At the beginning, he won't shut up, then he'll cry."

Ronnie gasped, "I'm appalled, Miss Montgomery."

I laughed, "How about 40-Year-Old Virgin? I don't feel watching you cry."

Ronnie sighed, "Fine."

I laughed, "Jess, you cool with that?"

She nodded, still chuckling at Ron's overdramatics. I sat on the couch.

"Put on the movie, slave."

He crossed his arms, "And what if I don't?"

I made a cross with my pointer fingers and put them over my lips, "No kisses."

His mouth dropped open, "What?! No, not fair! Wait, you can't resist me, either."

I smiled, "Watch me."

He groaned and stomped around, taking the first DVD out and putting the second one in. He threw himself next to me, his arm around me.

"Kiss, please."

I shook my head, "Watch how long I can resist you."

He groaned, but started to watch the movie. A few minutes later, I felt Ronnie's lips on my ear.

"I can't resist you much longer," he whispered, "And I know that once I kiss you, you won't be able to pull away."

I snorted, never moving my head from the tv.

"Look at me," he whispered.

I turned my head toward him. His dark eyes were glistening and he had no smirk on his face. He looked so beautiful. I bit my lip.

"Are you gonna stop me?"

I shook my head. He moved his lips, his pace slow. The anticipation made my head spin. His lips finally hit mine. We kept our lips locked for a few minutes before I pulled away, breathless. I opened my eyes to see Ronnie's eyes fluttering open.

"I love you," he whispered, biting his lip.

I leaned in and rested my forehead on his, "We should stop for now," I whispered, "After a certain point, I'm not gonna stop. And I don't want her to have to sit through another movie alone."

Ronnie let out a breathless laugh, "I know."

We kissed once more before turning our attention to the movie.

-----------------------------

I pulled her closer to me, both my arms around her waist. She put her hands on mine, interlocking our fingers. I pressed my lips to her neck once.

"I love you."

I felt her squeeze my hands and I smiled as she repeated my words.

After the movie was over, I looked down at the sleeping girl in my arms. I felt horrible for what I was about to do. I untangled our limbs, then she moved around in her sleep.

"Babe?" she called out, her voice quiet.

I cringed, "Yes, babe?"

"Where are you going?"

"I was just gonna go to the bathroom," I whispered.

She nodded, then fell back asleep. I kissed her forehead, keeping my lips on her forehead for a long time. I stood up and went to walk out the door, when a voice stopped me.

"This is gonna kill her, you know."

I turned and saw Jessica sitting up, rubbing her eyes. I sighed. Busted.

"I know. And I hate doing this to her. To me."

"Then don't do it. Stay with her."

"If I stay the night, I won't leave. And I can't stay here and have her see me on shit."

Jessica sighed, "Ron, she loves you. She'll help you."

I nodded, "I'm not ready for help yet."

"But you know you need help?"

I shrugged, not responding. Jessica sighed again.

"Listen, I can tell you love Norah. But you need to stop doing this to her and to yourself. Just stay here and be with her."

I shrugged again. I turned to walk out of the door. As I opened the door, I turned my head to look at Jessica.

"Just tell her I love her, please? I love her so much. And tell her I'm sorry."

Jessica nodded, "I promise."

And with her words hanging over my head, I once again left my home and the girl I love.