Love from, Hell

After shopping, Julie and her mother came home to find Malcolm and Ken in the backyard enjoying the sun. Ken was sitting leisurely in an outdoor lounge chair, reading the newspaper. Malcolm was sitting in another chair, but was reading one of Kyle's books- The Catcher in the Rye. He looked up when Julie and her mother walked into the backyard from the house. Julie was caught under the sudden intensity of his stare.

"Well, how was the shopping trip?" Ken asked curiously, but didn't looking up from his newspaper.

Heather sat down in another chair, picking up the puzzles section of the newspaper that had been left aside by her husband. "Very nice. We had some good mother-daughter bonding time," she said, smiling at Julie.

Julie sat down tentatively in the chair next to Malcolm.

Ken snorted kindly at the phrase "mother daughter bonding." "Did you find a dress though?" he asked, skipping straight to the primary objective of the trip.

"Yes we did. It's white," Julie answered.

Ken looked up from his paper, frowning in thought. "Isn't it against the rules to wear white to a wedding? Doesn't the bride only get to wear white?" he wondered aloud.

Heather chuckled. "What are talking about?" she laughed at her husband.

Ken shrugged and went back to his paper. "I just thought… you know… traditionally," he mumbled, distracted back to his newspaper.

Julie glanced at Malcolm. Surprisingly, he wasn't reading and was looking up at Julie's mother and father with a curious, intent expression on his face, as though he'd been listening very carefully.

He looked at Julie, feeling her gaze. Julie glanced at Malcolm's book and then back up at Malcolm. As if he knew the intent behind the quick look, Malcolm put the book up on the table, losing his place, like he was finished with it for the time being.

"You want to go for a ride?" Julie asked Malcolm quietly.

Malcolm nodded and stood up quickly.

As they hurried down to the shed, Julie's mother called to them. "Be back for dinner!"

Malcolm hesitated in front of the shed door. Julie looked at him.

"What should we take?" he asked her.

"Umm... how about the dirt bike?" Julie suggested as casually as she could.

Malcolm flashed a brief, but glad, smile at her and then extracted the dirt bike from the shed. He pushed it down the drive way.

Once they were out of sight of the house and Julie's parents, Malcolm sat on the dirt bike and the dropped one of his arms, indicating the space he'd left in front of him was for Julie. Since she needed no further prompting, Julie sat down in front of Malcolm, feeling the rush of warmth and her heart rate pick up. Malcolm keyed up the engine so it roared, though not with the same powerful sophistication as his car. He eased out of the driveway, both hands on the handlebars, then turned and tore off down the street, making their escape, catching Julie around the waist again when she jerked off balance.

"Where should we go?" Malcolm asked Julie, his voice right near her ear. Julie had never really noticed the tenor undertone his voice had, almost musical.

She paused, thinking about his question. She abandoned all unsure thoughts of what would be appropriate or conventional and tried to think of a place she really wanted to go, a place she wanted to show to Malcolm.

"Just keep heading straight down the main road," Julie instructed mysteriously.

Malcolm obliged, weaving easily in and out of traffic. He followed Julie's directions until they were on the outskirts of the city, although in a different place then they had ever been. Julie told Malcolm to stop outside a large, ornate building of classic Oriental design.

Malcolm got off after Julie. "Where are we?" he wanted to know, looking up at the building.

Julie looked back at Malcolm. "A Buddhist temple. Well, temple and monastery," she said and then waved for Malcolm to follow her. She looked back, surprised, when he did not. He'd stayed rooted to his spot staring up at the temple.

"Come on," she encouraged kindly.

Malcolm continued to stare at the building; his expression was tense and confused. Julie also became confused and curious to his reaction.

She came back to him. "Malcolm?" Julie prompted quietly.

Malcolm tore his eyes away from the building to look at Julie. His expression was so pained; it made Julie anxious for him.

"Come," she implored again, holding out her hand for him to follow.

Malcolm bulked, pursing his lips together, staying where he was."... we're… trespassing," he chose the world carefully.

"No. We're allowed to go inside the temple… but we're not going in there," Julie said, mysterious again.

Malcolm narrowed his eyes at her critically. Although the look was cold and severe, Julie somehow managed not to falter. Perhaps because she was getting used to his icy glares. They never really seemed to equate to Malcolm really being angry with her.

"Then where, may I ask, are we going?" he wanted to know.

Julie pressed her lips together indicating she wouldn't tell. Malcolm calmed his look, but eyed her speculatively.

"C'mon," Julie said and bravely took his hand.

Malcolm's hand was warm and smooth, and although he didn't grip her hand, Julie could feel his muscles were strong. She pulled him gently and he followed reluctantly, his eyes flashing back to the temple, thoughts clearly raging through his mind.

"Don't be scared," Julie assured him, although Malcolm's expression wasn't exactly fearful.

Malcolm looked at her quickly. "I'm not scared," he answered and followed Julie more willingly.

She didn't need to tow him along, Malcolm was right behind her, but Julie didn't let go of his hand. She didn't know when she would have an opportunity to hold his hand again so she didn't let go of her grasp.

Julie led Malcolm along around the building to the back, and slid through a break in some tall hedges that were creating a boundary. Malcolm didn't pause and slid through just as easily as Julie had. He stopped though at the sight of the other side of the hedge.

The garden had been donated by the city to the monastery, and it was kept up well by the monks who had little else to do during the day besides meditate and garden. The stone walkways twisted around little groves of seating which circled around patches of elaborately designed flower beds.

Julie grinned at Malcolm. He was staring, completely absorbed with the garden.

"It's nice, isn't it?" Julie said.

Malcolm didn't say anything in response. Finally, though, he nodded. He looked down at Julie expectantly.

"C'mon," Julie said and continued leading Malcolm by the hand again.

Malcolm followed Julie obediently through the garden. Soon they reached another boundary of hedges, taller and thicker than the ones that they'd first come through. Julie struggled to pull back the branches with one hand and reluctantly let go of Malcolm so she could try to pry the hedge apart with two hands. She was managing, but Malcolm helped her, opening it wider for her to step through. Julie climbed through and then Malcolm slipped in behind her.

"Oh," he said very quietly.

Julie looked back and smiled at him.

The monastery was on top of a hill, although it was hard to detect the elevation when you approached it gradually from the road. But on the other side of the hedges, the hill turned into a cliff that looked back over the city. The ledge wasn't very wide, only a few feet, but it was enough to sit comfortably and look out.

So Julie sat down, her legs dangling and Malcolm sat down next to her.

"How did you find out about this place?" he asked Julie.

Julie leaned back and braced her arms against the ground. "My brother was into Buddhism for awhile and I went with him to the temple a couple times. I liked looking around the gardens more than anything and I got curious and wanted to know what was on the other side of the hedges and…voila," Julie said.

Malcolm nodded slowly. "Is your brother not into Buddhism anymore?" he asked.

"No. He changes his mind all the time- when he finds a flaw in his current religion, he moves on to something else," Julie said and glanced at Malcolm.

He was watching her.

Julie looked back at the city. "It's pretty silly. I don't think that he sees that his music is his religion," she said and tucked her knees against her chest. She looked at Malcolm again, but he had looked away, thinking.

"What is your religion?" he asked her suddenly, his voice distant.

Julie pursed her lips, thinking about her answer. "Um… I guess I don't have one. Not that I'm aware of anyway," she said. Malcolm said nothing.

Julie looked at him and his face was expressionless, but she could see that his jaw was clenched very tightly.

"Do you follow a religion?" she asked him curiously.

Malcolm didn't say anything- he was doing the unaware of his surroundings thing. Julie looked away and sighed quietly. He was allowed to ask her anything, but she wasn't allowed to do the same to him?

"I don't have one. I never did," Malcolm said, startling Julie.

"What do you mean 'never did'?" she wanted to know.

Malcolm shot her a look at her question. Julie hid a smile.

"I mean never as in never." he said impatiently.

Julie held down a giggle.

"Religion wasn't exactly encouraged in my… family," Malcolm said very carefully, a strange, un-amused smile on his face, and then he looked away again.

Curiosity raged within Julie and she was sure if he looked at her now he would be able to see it. "Why?" she said softly.

Malcolm tensed his jaw again and said nothing. Julie knew that he wouldn't say anything this time. She looked away, thinking, trying desperately to figure it out, but absolutely nothing added up. Julie looked at Malcolm speculatively.

"Malcolm?" She said.

"Hm," Malcolm hummed quickly.

"What's your last name?" she wanted to know.

Malcolm looked at her, surprised by the question. "I don't have one," he answered honestly.

Julie looked away, frowning. She knew Malcolm was still looking at her.

"Malcolm?" Julie said again and turned to him.

His blue eyes were staring at her but she refused to shake her resolve.

"Who are you?" she wanted to know, almost demanding.

Malcolm's face flashed through many expressions, changing his features while he gazed at her, but then he settled on a light, teasing look. "I'm Malcolm," he said, and gave her a small smile.

Julie fought to keep from smiling back. She frowned instead, in thought. She continued to face him, but her eyes looked away.

"I guess what I meant was… what are you?" Julie rephrased.

Malcolm smiled again. "Are you revisiting the vampire theory?" he asked her.

Julie shook her head, looking down and trying to clear it of his infectious teasing.

"I'm a human. I promise," he said.

Julie looked up at him, doubt still lacing her eyes. But he was looking at her and still smiling, his blue eyes amazingly scorching. Julie felt her heart beat pick up dramatically and she was having a hard time staying on her train of thought.

"You know what I mean," Julie said, smiling back at him. "Please tell me. Who are you?" she asked, her eyes pleading with him. They stared at each other. Julie could see the conflict in his eyes.

"It's better you don't know," he told her finally.

Julie looked down and pursed her lips. She glanced up at him, but he wasn't looking at her anymore.

"Please Malcolm. I really want to know." Julie confessed.

Malcolm's mouth twitched and then he composed himself. "Julie," he said.

Julie's heart fluttered when he said her name.

"I want to be your friend. It's important to me. I don't want anything unnecessary to change that," Malcolm said with a stiff formality.

Julie smiled, although it didn't answer anything. Malcolm was pointedly not looking at her.

Julie looked away out at the glowing horizon. "Friends don't keep secrets," she muttered under her breath, but knew it wouldn't convince Malcolm to tell her anything.

Ok. She was going to guess that Malcolm hadn't stolen his car and was considerably wealthy, or came from a wealthy family. Maybe, judging by the way Malcolm was so quiet and secretive; his family was watched by the public. Although Julie was sure she would have remembered if she'd seen Malcolm on TV.

She suddenly wondered if Malcolm's father was a politician. The money and the secrecy and the shame for his background… it sort of fit.

"Is… your father in politics?" Julie asked him.

Malcolm shocked her by breaking into peals of fantastic, echoing laughter. Julie looked at him, blushing from embarrassment, but amazed at how euphoric and handsome he looked.

He finally calmed down after a glorious moment of laughter. "I guess you could say that," he said, still chuckling and shaking his head.

Julie, still pink, bit her lip and looked away. So his father was sort of a politician. Julie didn't know much about politics- the cornucopia of information to know about that world intimidated her. She looked at Malcolm, intent on asking another question, but then stopped.

Suddenly, her anxiety to figure out Malcolm evaporated. Although she was still curious, Julie couldn't find the same determination behind her mission. She got caught up looking at Malcolm and the lines of his face. His dark eyelashes flickered a little as he watched the city below. He really was darkly regal; almost so handsome it hurt to look at him. Julie smiled to herself. Maybe Malcolm was a prince.

She looked away at the horizon. The city was very pretty from up here. Julie looked up at the few puffy but prominent clouds in the sky. She looked at the gray lining of the clouds that faced away from the sun.

"Cloud shadows," she muttered suddenly.

"What?" Malcolm said.

Julie glanced at him. He was looking at her curiously.

"Um, well the sun is hitting the clouds so that the clouds are casting shadows on themselves," she said.

Malcolm was still looking at her, an inquisitive frown on his face.

"I mean… we just perceive that the sun and the clouds are in the same space. Really the sun is much higher up and further away then the clouds so-"

"It would make the clouds cast shadows on themselves," Malcolm finished quietly.

Julie nodded and looked at him. He was staring at her like he had that morning in the kitchen. Julie felt her heart race and that strange spell that forced her to stare back at him kick in. His eyes were searching hers so intensely, Julie worried a little that he could read her mind.

"Do you know that your eyes look exactly like emeralds?" Malcolm said very softly, more to himself than to Julie.

She blushed and looked down.

"What?" he asked.

Julie looked up at him. "Thanks," she murmured.

Malcolm looked at her, his blue eyes curious. "For telling you the truth?" he asked, straight-forward.

Julie blushed again. "How would you react if I said that you had eyes like a sea of light sapphires?" she asked, trying to be sarcastic, but was breathless.

"A complimentary hyperbole," Malcolm shrugged, not breaking his gaze.

Julie smiled a half smile. "I don't think so. I'm telling you the truth," she said, quoting him back to him.

Malcolm smiled a small half smile in response. "Are you sure? I've always been certain my eyes were black," he mused darkly, his eyes shifting away from hers, again speaking more to himself.

"Haven't you ever looked in a mirror?" Julie asked rhetorically.

Malcolm's smile was twisted and sad when he looked at her. "They just appear to be blue," he told her, and then looked past her. "When I look in the mirror carefully enough, all I can see is black," Malcolm said softly.

Julie felt a shiver run down her spine- a combination of fear at his words and her unwavering attraction toward him. "I can assure you, Malcolm, that I have looked at your eyes long enough and carefully enough that there is no… black in them," she promised him, trying to sound confident, but blushed anyway at her confession.

Malcolm looked back at her. Yes, she was positive there was only blue.

"My heart is black," he told her. He was confident.

Julie frowned. "It couldn't be," sje said.

"It is," Malcolm assured her.

"No. First of all, biologically that couldn't be," Julie began.

Malcolm grinned crookedly at her and looked away at the horizon. Julie felt her lungs suck in oxygen, taking advantage of the opportunity to breathe easily, although her heart and stomach dropped a little, disappointed, when Malcolm looked away.

"Couldn't I be an exception?" Malcolm asked, teasing softly, but his smile was hard.

Julie didn't doubt at all that Malcolm was an exception to almost every normal human trait.

"Ok, then, metaphorically speaking. You don't have a black heart," Julie told him.

"Why not?" he asked her sharply and turned to look at Julie.

She faltered. "Because… you saved me," Julie managed to get out.

Malcolm was suddenly glaring at her, but seemed at a loss for what to say. "... those men happened to be in the way," he finally gave the excuse.

"I don't mean that time," Julie said.

Malcolm frowned.

"When you saved me at the gas station," Julie reminded him.

Malcolm's frown seemed frozen into place.

"And… when I was about to fall off the bike, you caught me," Julie said very softly and continued to look at him.

Malcolm, against his own will, relaxed his frown. For only a fraction of a moment, his eyes were kind and almost sad. But it was gone so fast Julie wasn't sure it had happened.

He was looking at her shrewdly. "Safety first," Malcolm muttered and looked down at the ground and then out at the sky.

"If I sliced you open right now-" Julie began.

Malcolm looked at her. "Would you?" he requested.

Julie was surprised by the sudden suicidal streak, but hid it and narrowed her eyes at him. "Hypothetically, if I sliced you open, your heart would be just as red as mine," she finished.

Malcolm looked away. "I thought we got past speaking about the biology," he said to the city.

Julie paused. She was determined to prove Malcolm wrong.

"Ok. If I threw myself off this cliff right now, are you saying you wouldn't try to catch me or stop me?" Julie demanded.

Malcolm gave her a very withering look and Julie cringed a little inwardly. But she stood up. Malcolm eyes followed her.

"Alright, instead of purposely throwing myself, what if I just fell accidentally?" Julie said.

Malcolm paused, thinking, but his eyes were hard as he stared at her. "... well, yes, of course I'd catch you or stop you," he said, frowning.

"But that doesn't prove anything; I could just think you dying would be a waste since you have a lot to contribute to society," Malcolm said, inadvertently complimenting her.

Julie frowned too, thinking hard. "How does the thought of people drowning kittens make you feel?" she demanded.

"If they can't take care of them or find them a home, are the kittens better off starving and sick in the wild?" Malcolm reasoned.

Julie put her hands on her hips, stumped and frustrated.

"Am I annoying you?" Malcolm asked. He sounded amused.

Julie glared down at the cliff. "No. But you are making me sad," she said, calculating.

"Why?" Malcolm wanted to know, and Julie was flattered that he sounded concerned.

"Because. You're saying that if I fell off of this cliff and died, you'd just be perturbed that I couldn't contribute to society," Julie said.

Malcolm stood up suddenly. "I only said that I could be thinking that."

"Then what would you really be thinking?" Julie wanted to know and looked at Malcolm.

His blue eyes were staring at her and he looked put on the spot. "I… don't know," He sounded upset that he didn't have an answer.

Julie looked down at the edge of the cliff. She bit her lip, wondering if she had the guts to dare it. She was pretty sure that Malcolm would catch her, but she was crazy to purposefully be throwing herself off a cliff- without any reason behind the action except to make a point. But she had to prove to Malcolm that he didn't have a cruel heart.

She closed her eyes and just stepped off.

"Julie!" Malcolm exclaimed and snatched her under the arms as her waist was falling past the edge.

Julie looked up quickly at Malcolm as he pulled her back up. His eyes were angry… and fearful. Back on the ledge, Julie looked at Malcolm, and he glared at her and seemed to be breathing a little harder than normal.

"Are you insane?!" he demanded.

Julie ignored this. "How did you feel just then??" she inquired urgently.

Malcolm frowned deeper. "Angry!" he accused. Julie didn't have to prompt to get him to continue. "And scared! And concerned!" he ranted on.

"And you felt that way because I might not contribute to society?" Julie asked quietly.

Malcolm stopped abruptly and his anger immediately subsided and he looked at her with a much softer expression. "No," he admitted just as quietly.

Julie wanted to ask him why he had felt those things then, but suddenly worried that was too big a question, scared that the honest answer he would give wasn't the one she wanted very badly to hear.

"I, um, think I've proved my point," Julie settled on.

Malcolm paused and then smiled a small smile. "For now," he conceded to her win. "But, don't do anything like that again. Just to prove a point," he reprimanded, giving her a quick glare.

Julie smiled. "I'll try not to," she promised.