Love from, Hell

Julie opened her mouth to argue but then stopped, knowing it would be useless now. She leaned back in her seat as Malcolm smoothly turned the car around and drove back toward her house. He slowed to a crawl when they reached her street and stopped in front of Julie's house.

Julie recognized this atmosphere: it had been the same unsaid goodbye when he'd first taken her home.

“Well… thank you. For everything. I don’t know how I’ll pay you back…” Julie began. Malcolm looked away out the windshield.

“Don’t think of it,” He said and he sounded like he meant it quite literally- like he wanted her to forget about it completely. Forget him, she now realized he had meant. In that moment though, Julie had just nodded awkwardly.

“Well, good bye,” She said and she could hear the slight sadness in her voice.

Julie's breath caught at the memory and she fought the onslaught of tears threatening to make her cry. Malcolm turned the ignition and the engine hummed off. He leaned back a little in his seat, but left the key where it was. They sat in silence for many minutes and to Julie they felt short, like not enough time.

"You truly are amazing," Malcolm murmured softly, looking out the windshield. Julie looked at him through her glazed eyes.

"Hm?" She croaked quietly.

"Any other human would have driven a stake through my heart by now or at the very least run away screaming," He explained. Julie sighed very quietly and looked out the windshield.

"You're not a vampire," She reminded him in an incoherent mumble. Malcolm gave a dark, quiet chuckle.

"No. I'm much worse than a vampire." He said with twisted, unhappy smile. Julie inhaled sharply,

"I don't think you are," She confessed. Malcolm's eyelashes flickered quickly at her statement.

"You'll have nightmares regardless. I'm sorry for that," He said, polite and sincere. Julie frowned a little.

"I will only have nightmares…" Julie began. "…if I know you've left, forever." She finished, her voice breaking.

Malcolm's eyes flashed to her face and he seemed to be unable to stop himself from turning and facing her. He lifted his hand hesitantly, and then rested it back on his leg.

"You can't possibly believe that it's best thing for you if I stay. You know now, what I am," He said and sounded painfully confused. Julie bit her lip while she stared out the windshield.

"You must see now, Julie. If I stayed in your presence… if we even remained friends…" He trailed off frustrated, looking away. Julie's heart throbbed sadly at this. Couldn't even be friends.

"You said that you couldn't even dream of having something that I have," Julie whispered. Malcolm looked at her again. "It would seem that I'm in the same boat," She breathed waveringly and looked at Malcolm. He was staring at her and Julie willingly let herself drown under his blue eyes, if just for the last time. Her breath caught painfully several times, making her swallow.

"Julie… you are stupid and foolish!" He hissed at her while he stared. Julie coughed a little and turned away before he could see her tears escape.

"I know it," She mumbled thickly.

"You should be throwing me out. Running from me as fast as you possibly can. I'm no good for you, you are infinitely better than I am," He continued on, leaning toward her. Julie's eyelashes fluttered against her tears as she leaned back in her seat.

"Why aren't you running?? Why are you giving me what my selfish black heart craves?? How can you possibly feel this way for me??" He demanded strongly, leaning ever closer to her. Julie parted her lips to draw in a shaky breath. Malcolm gripped her limp wrist.

"I… can't help it. You, you," Julie gulped as more tears escaped she glanced at Malcolm. He looked tortured, with one hand raised as though it was fighting to reach forward and touch her cheek.

"You… you can't control who you fall in love with." She reminded him, looking out the windshield. Julie refused to look at his face, knowing it would only break her heart if she did.

"Julie…" He murmured. Julie looked at him instinctively, startled by the softness of his voice. She stared into his eyes as he leaned over to her and held her face in his hand. His mouth gently pressed against hers. This kiss was softer than ever… and yet it had infinitely more weight. Julie could feel the intense feeling that Malcolm felt behind his kiss. He gently held her face with both his hands while he brushed his lips against hers. He drew away an inch.

"You are too strong and brave for your own good," Malcolm murmured at her and his breath danced across her mouth. Julie shivered, although now it was with delicious attraction.

"Please Malcolm… don't leave," Julie whispered, breathless and scared, her eyes staring into hers. He looked back into hers, his thoughts on less conflicted things while he lightly stroked her cheek with his thumb.

"I shouldn't… It's wrong… I will kill myself before I let the unknown consequences of this love hurt you…" He said softly. Julie continued to stare at him.

"But… it's as I said earlier… He murmured. "I don't have the strength to leave your strong presence… I want you too much," Malcolm confessed easily. Julie's hand flitted up to touch his face. Malcolm's dark eyelashes moved when she touched his skin, his eyes shifting into more scorching looks.

"Really?" Julie breathed. Malcolm stared down at hers, boring into her heart.

"I love you," He explained and a small frown danced across his forehead and then disappeared. He never stopped gazing at her. Julie moved her fingers to lightly touch his forehead where the frown had been.

"It confuses you?" She asked.

"I had no idea that I was… capable of such a thing. But apparently I can love… more intensely than anything else. Perhaps it's another torture instrument. I imagine the pain would be the worst thing in the world if I had to leave you," He said and seemed to be speaking more to himself. "Yes… that fits," He murmured.

Julie lifted both her hands to hold his face and redirect his attention back to her.

"You don't have to worry, I won't stop loving you," She murmured to him. He looked at her, at first insanely sad, and then Julie could see the hope and passion take over, like he couldn't help but believe her.

He leaned in again to kiss her. This kiss was like the one in the hallway, tender but with an edge of passion, while his lips moved with hers. Julie felt the warmth spread over her body as the spell kicked in again, glad to flush the pain out of her system and make her happy.

Malcolm drew back slowly and opened his eyes. Julie gazed back at him. He was looking at her peacefully, but with an edge of wariness.

"Come… I think it's been a long enough day," Malcolm said decisively. Julie opened her mouth to protest, but he was already out of the car. She shut her mouth, put out. Malcolm was at her door and opening it.

"What's wrong?" He asked instantly, startled by her sullen expression.

"… I don't want to go to sleep." Julie shrugged in a mumble. Malcolm eyed her, not believing her simple explanation. But he let it drop for the time being and shyly offered her his hand. Julie's mood lifted exponentially and she gladly held Malcolm's hand as he unnecessarily assisted her out of the car. He didn't release her hand as they walked up to the house and Julie certainly wasn't about to let go.

Before when she'd held his hand, she'd been towing him along. Now they were equally walking next to each other. And it was completely different than holding hands with Matt, Julie noted. Neither Malcolm nor Julie allowed any space between them.

Julie reluctantly released Malcolm's hand and quickly unlocked the door and scooted into her house. She pulled off her jacket, looking around the dark hallway. Her parents were set in their routine and were already in bed: 10:30 every night. Julie sighed and then realized Malcolm wasn't behind her. She turned. He was standing unsurely on the threshold, looking into the house.

"Malcolm?" Julie prompted. He looked at her.

"…are you sure your parents will be alright with my sudden return to your home? I don't want to push their hospitality," He said. Julie rolled her eyes.
'
"You're not. It's my home too and I cordially demand that you stay," Julie told him. Malcolm paused and then smiled at her.

"Alright," He murmured and stepped in and quietly shut the door.

Julie could thrillingly make out Malcolm's tall profile in the dark hallway. She couldn't really see him move, but her body certainly could sense ecstatically when he came closer.

"Hm. Your family should think about installing some lights in this hallway," He said quietly, his voice even closer than Julie had hoped. Her heart fluttered.

"Oh, er, we do," Julie admitted sheepishly. Malcolm paused, thinking.

"Well if we're going upstairs, there's no point in turning on the light," He reasoned, his voice humming. He stepped a little closer to Julie.

"Exactly," She said breathlessly. She felt a shock when Malcolm put his hands on her shoulders and spun her lightly around. Julie let him gently guide usher her over to the staircase.

"Don't trip," He murmured in her ear as they ascended. Julie's breath caught in her throat. Malcolm's musical undertone swirled in her head and his fingers drifted from her shoulders to brush her neck.

"How about you trip a little one time and then I'll lord it over you for the rest of your life?" Julie suggested teasingly and still breathless. Malcolm chuckled darkly and his breath danced across the skin of her neck, sending pleasurable shivers down her spine.

"No chance," he declined.

They reached the landing and Malcolm let his hands fall from Julie's shoulders. Julie reached back to brush his fingers when they fall, getting his attention. She turned to him. Malcolm looked at her, pleasantly curious. Julie inhaled and scratched her neck, feeling like an idiot.

"…um…" She began. Malcolm waited. Julie struggled, unsure of how to phrase what she needed to say.

"Yes?" Malcolm encouraged. Julie laughed a quick embarrassed laugh and then looked away, pursing her lips. Malcolm chuckled at her.

"What is it, Julie?" He murmured and came closer to her, reaching out to run his fingers lightly down from her elbow to her hand. He clasped her fingers securely.

"Um… well, I'm kind of worried…" Julie began again. Malcolm came a little closer.

"What is it?" He asked, concerned, his blue eyes noticeably attentive even in the dark. Julie thought hard, staring at him.

"I don't really want to go to bed," She confessed doggedly. Malcolm narrowed his eyes suspiciously at her.

"Why not?" Malcolm insisted.

"Well, I'm just not that tired," Julie half lied. Malcolm continued to look at her suspiciously.

"What do you want to do?" Malcolm asked. Julie raised her eyebrow without thinking about it, but in the dark Malcolm couldn't see.

"Well… we could watch a movie," Julie suggested.

"Julie," Malcolm began in a laborious whisper. "You should really go to sleep. It's been a thoroughly exhausting day. You need to… process," He told her.

"But I really don't want to go to sleep. Please can we watch a movie?" Julie pleaded. Malcolm gave her a very icy look and then miraculously relented.

"Yes if you want to," He said.

"Well I don’t want to make you. If you don't want-" Julie said.

"Julie I'll watch movies with you all night if you like," Malcolm interrupted her.

"Ok," Julie said and smiled. Malcolm was watching her carefully and then kissed her.

Elated from the kissing and getting her away, Julie towed Malcolm into the den.

"I want you to understand though that I don't agree with this. You should sleep," Malcolm stressed as he sat fluidly on the futon. Julie moved to pick a movie, any movie, but Malcolm held on to her hand and pulled her down next to him.

"Um," Julie got out before he started kissing her. Julie willingly ditched the movie idea immediately and held his face with one hand and touched his side with the other. Malcolm held Julie's face and part of the back of her neck and wrapped his arm around her waist. This was a fire kiss. Julie inhaled sharply and gripped her hands into his hair.

For a moment Malcolm responded fantastically to her action, pushing her against the back of the futon and pressing his chest against hers, and then he seemed to realize something and drew back. Julie reluctantly opened her eyes and looked at him curiously. Malcolm was watching her guardedly.

"Julie, I'm not sure… I mean you need sleep, or at least a distraction. Please, put on the movie," He said apologetically. Julie frowned a little, sitting up.

"Why do I need a distraction? I don't want to be distracted… not that I really could be with you here," Julie said. Malcolm tensed his jaw, staring at her.

"What?" Julie wanted to know anxiously.

"Julie, you should sleep," Malcolm decided. "Please?" He added on softly. The begging was very distracting but Julie forced herself to stay focused.

"Why the concern for my sleeping habits?" Julie said, mimicking a question he'd asked her once upon a time.

"Because Julie, you need to time to rest and process and… let everything sink in. Things might look… clearer in the morning. You'll be able to think rationally," Malcolm said.

"I'm thinking rationally right now," Julie lied. Malcolm raised his eyebrows at her.

"Oh? Then why aren't you going to bed?" Malcolm wanted to know.

"Why aren't you?" Julie retorted. Malcolm gave her an exasperated look.

"Julie…" He almost scolded.

"Don't "Julie" me," She said.

Malcolm paused suddenly, averting his eyes away from her and then looked back at Julie oddly.

"…are we having a fight?" He asked curiously. Julie continued to look at him for a moment and then had to fight back the giggles.

"No," She finally said honestly. Malcolm relaxed a little and smiled at Julie. She immediately smiled back. They stared at each other.

"Malcolm?" Julie whispered.

"Yes?" Malcolm said quietly back.

"I don't want to go to sleep because I'm afraid you'll be gone in the morning," Julie admitted and could feel the heat of a blush creeping up her neck.

Suddenly, though, Malcolm took Julie in his arms and held her on his lap. Julie immediately wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her head on his shoulder. He smelled fantastic.

"I know I have a terrible track record. I know, I'm so sorry. You don't have to go to sleep, you don't have to do anything. I'll stay right here if you want me to," Malcolm offered.

"Why do you want me to sleep so bad?" Julie said softly to his neck. It looked so smooth. Julie touched his throat. It was smooth.

"Because… I thought maybe in the morning you would be less foolish after you've slept and been away from me. You'll realize that the smart thing to do is not to be with me and you'd properly hate me," Malcolm admitted.

"But why would you want that?" Julie wondered. Malcolm paused.

"I just want to know how you really feel. If you still have any logic… and if there's part of you that's doubtful or scared or-"

"Malcolm?" Julie interrupted.

"…what?" He asked.

"You're thinking too much." Julie told him and pulled back to look at his face. He looked down at her and his eyes were soft.

"Am I?" He asked her and then he surprised her by stroking her hair.

"Mhm," Julie nodded and leaned against his shoulder again.

"Hm," Malcolm said. He sounded unsure, but only a little.

"… but you want to be here in the morning to see how I feel after a good night's rest?" Julie clarified.

"Yes. No more running away." Malcolm promised, running his fingers lightly through her hair. It felt nice.

"Ok… but do we have to do the "me being away from you" part?" Julie asked. Malcolm paused.

"Well…" He said unsure.

"I mean, if you really think it's better for my subconscious or whatever to sleep on my own…" Julie said frowning.

"Oh. No that's not it," Malcolm said and chuckled lightly for some reason. Julie looked up at him.

"I was thinking of your parents actually. I don't think that their reception of my return would go smoother if I slept with you," Malcolm said. Julie's hearted pounded at his words, even though he meant them literally. She tried to ignore her crackling sex radar and smiled at him.

"Oh. Well we could just stay here. No bedrooms," Julie suggested and grinned. Malcolm smiled crookedly at her and Julie's breath caught.

"Deal," He said.

Julie leaned in and kissed Malcolm. She could tell he was a little surprised, but his reception of her kissing him did go smoothly. Malcolm held the back of her neck as Julie gently pushed him back down on the couch. Malcolm followed what she wanted easily and lay down, holding Julie around the waist while she lay on top of him and finished kissing him.

Julie pulled back and then crossed her arms on his chest and rested her chin on them. Malcolm opened his eyes and blinked at her.

"Julie?" He asked. Julie's was surprised and pleased that his voice was a little rough.

"Yeah?" Julie said.

"Have you done this before?" Malcolm wanted to know.

"Done what?" She asked curiously.

"Been in love before?" Malcolm asked. Julie blushed.

"Like this? No not even close," Julie said.

"You've never had… what do you call them? Like a suitor…" Malcolm said frowning.

"A boyfriend?" Julie supplied and then giggled at him. Malcolm ignored her giggling.

"Yes. You've never had a boyfriend before?" He asked doubtfully. Julie blushed again.

"Well, yeah. I've had a boyfriend," Julie said.

"Did you love him?" Malcolm asked curiously. Julie gazed at Malcolm. She didn't really want to answer his question, since she didn't really want to talk about her other normal, mundane, past relationships, when intriguing and fantastic was lying beneath her right now.

"Not really. I mean I cared for them, but… I've never felt anything like this," Julie said. Malcolm gazed back at her and then suddenly narrowed his eyes.

"Them?" He asked, emphasizing the plural. He wasn't as jealous or upset sounding as he could have been. Julie pretended he was anyway and rolled her eyes.

"Yes. Two makes it a 'them'," She told him. Malcolm relaxed and smiled at her.

"What were there names?" He asked and started running his hand through her hair again.

"Andrew and Noah," Julie said. Malcolm made a face.

"Bible names," He commented with his face. Julie quickly hid her surprise so he couldn't detect it and ended up giggling at his comment.

"We were in high school. I dated Andrew when we were juniors and then Noah and I were sort of boyfriend and girlfriend in senior year." Julie continued on.

"Sort of?" Malcolm picked up.

"We were more like convenient dates for all the grad events. Pretty close friends," Julie said. Malcolm nodded.

"How come things ended?" Malcolm asked. Julie ignored his question for a moment and reached over to the copy table and picked up a Werther's. She unwrapped it and popped in her mouth.

"It wasn't like big, epic break ups. Andrew and I just sort of grew apart, into more friend feelings, and Noah went away to California for school… actually, the thought of doing a long distance thing never really occurred to me," Julie said. Malcolm picked up a Werther's too and unwrapped it somehow with one hand. He put the candy in his mouth and then raised an eyebrow at Julie.

"Hm. Are you sure they felt the same way? Purely friendly feelings?" Malcolm questioned.

"Um… well we… why?" She asked. Malcolm shrugged.

"You're fantastic," He explained. Julie rolled her eyes good naturedly.

"You're biased," She replied. Malcolm eyed Julie and sent a quick attraction shiver over her skin.

"Don't you trust my judgment?" He asked.

"Well yeah, but…" Julie trailed off. Malcolm continued to eye Julie, his blue eyes x raying her.

"What about you? Have you done this before?" Julie demanded, changing the subject. She blinked. "Is that even possible for a prince? To have girlfriends?" Julie asked, very curious. Malcolm shrugged a little, looking past Julie.

"I suppose. But I wasn't interested in any women," Malcolm answered. Julie tilted her head to the side and gazed at Malcolm.

"Why not?" She asked. Malcolm blinked a little, his eyelashes moving a fraction.

"Women in Hell don't exactly make for the best relationships," He said softly with a hint of acidity.

"So… you were alone? Not one girl?" Julie asked and felt her heart break a little for him.

"Well, I was, and guess still am, betrothed to this one woman-"

"You're betrothed?" Julie demanded. Malcolm snapped out of staring at the ceiling and looked at her.

"I'm the prince, Julie. I can get out of anything I want," He assured her. Julie felt assured.

"Ok… but you are betrothed? To who? And why? And are you going to get out-?" Julie went on. Malcolm silenced her with a look. She pressed her lips together but continued to stare at him questioningly. Malcolm suddenly reached up touched Julie's face.

"Don't worry about that. I loathed the woman anyway and other than that there's nothing to say about her. I love you Julie," Malcolm said. Julie's heart melted.

"I love you too," She murmured back. They looked at each other for a long moment.

"You would have married her even though you hated her?" Julie asked. Malcolm closed his eyes and sighed very quietly.

"… Julie?" He said finally.

"Yes?" Julie answered immediately.

"If I tell you any more about myself tonight I'm afraid you're going to overload." Malcolm said. Julie sighed. She was sure that she could handle more, but didn’t want to push Malcolm.

"… but eventually you will tell me?" Julie checked.

"Everything," Malcolm promised.

"Soon?"

"If you are still in love with me, tomorrow," Malcolm promised again. Julie rolled her eyes.

"I'm glad you think so highly of my emotional stability," Julie said sarcastically. Malcolm grinned.

"I only want to make sure-" Malcolm defended.

"Fine, fine. If it'll make you feel better, than ok," Julie said and smiled. Malcolm smiled crookedly at her. Good sweet Lord… or whoever created him, Julie realized, he was handsome.

Malcolm lifted his head up and kissed Julie softly. When the kiss was finished, Julie blinked dreamily at Malcolm. After a moment, she realized she was pretty sleepy and tried to hide a yawn, but Malcolm saw through it. He slid out from under her. Julie made a noise of protest as he walked across the room. But all he did was turn out the lamp and return to the couch.

Malcolm sat down on the couch and pulled Julie into his lap and kept his arm around her waist. Julie twisted her head around so she could look at his face. He looked as perfect on this night as he had the night in the hotel. Malcolm didn't look at her as he lay back on the couch and Julie followed, lying on his chest and resting her head on his shoulder. She continued to stare at him as he reached for another Werther's, unwrapped it, and put it in his mouth. He looked at Julie as he rested his other arm carefully on her shoulders, his elbow bent to her chest.

"Are you ok?" Malcolm asked and his voice was close enough that Julie could hear the musical tone. She smiled at the slight, irrational, unsure tenor of the question.

"Mhm," Julie nodded. She could smell the scent from his neck. She suddenly felt less sleepy and leaned closer to touch her lips to his neck.

She felt Malcolm's chest lower as he exhaled suddenly. Julie experimented kissing his neck more. Malcolm's hold on her tightened slightly and the hand on her shoulder trailed absent-mindedly down her arm. Encouraged by his responses, Julie continued kissing Malcolm's neck. It was kind of thrilling actually as she turned on her side a little and kissed down to his collarbone…

"Julie?" Malcolm said gently and held her arm. Julie looked up at him. Looking at Malcolm's face wasn't making her want to stop kissing him. They stared at each other for a long moment, breathing a little heavily. Malcolm, for once, seemed to not know what to say. Malcolm looked away abruptly, clearing his throat quietly, and quickly grabbed another Werther's and put it in his mouth.

Julie giggled a little at him. Malcolm ignored her giggling and settled them back into their original position. Julie took a deep breath and then exhaled. It was comfortable lying on Malcolm's chest.

"Goodnight Julie," Malcolm murmured. Julie smiled at the ceiling.

"Goodnight Malcolm," Julie said.

The minutes sleepily ticked by as Julie tried to relax enough to fall asleep. Even though she was very comfortable with Malcolm's arms wrapped around her, it was hard to calm her brain enough for sleep with Malcolm's arms wrapped around her. Occasionally, Malcolm would lift the arm that was around Julie's shoulders to pick up another Werther's. Julie giggled at him, but he ignored her and continued on. Eventually Julie drifted off and didn't notice when Malcolm got more candy.