I am a Goth Cheerleader

I walked in the house with tears streaming down my face. When Adrian saw me, he came up to me and hugged me tight.

“It’s alright Blair,” he cooed into my hair as I cried harder.

He pulled away, sat me down on the couch, and rubbed my back a little while my head was in my hands. I heard the doorbell ring and Adrian got up to get it.

“Dean why are you here. I know what happened and you have the audacity to show up here.”

“Whoa slow down Adrian. Blair asked me to come over and so she could explain what is going on.”

A small voice cut through the silence. “Dean, let me explain.”

Dean sat down next to me with Adrian on my other side.

“Well it first started when a rumor spread that I was making fun of Adrian because he was bi-sexual. I finally convinced Adrian that I never said anything. It was the same with Diana. Someone said I had sex with you and that I had a STD. They said everyone knew and that I talk to you and other guys so it had to be true. I cannot help I hug all my friends and talk to mostly guys. I know Sydney’s behind all of this.” I explained.

“I’m sorry Blair. You know what the week after school ends I have tickets to a concert I was supposed to see with Diana. Would you like to go?”

“I would love too. We just can’t let on what we’re doing until after school ends, I don’t need the rumors even worse.” I said sniffling.

“Well, I have to get home. I have to study for the finals tomorrow.” Dean said. I walked him to the door.

“I’ll see you at school tomorrow, we’ll I guess from a distance. Blair, please don’t cry, it’s not very becoming on you.” He said hugging me.

The rest of the night was spent in my room studying. I was listening to Kamelot but it made me think of Marius, so I could not listen to them at the moment. I cried every once in a while and never made it down for supper.

I heard a knock on my door. “Blair can I come in,” I heard Adrian say.

“Sure,” I said as he walked in.

“Blair please eat this soup, please. I told mom you were sick because I don’t want her to worry.”

“Sure, I just can’t wait until the next week is over so I can finally get over what happened. I’m gonna go back to gymnastics over the summer to get back to my old self.”
“Blair, I really hope we can get better. I love you Blair.” I ate the soup and we talked. When he left, I knew what I had to do.

I pulled out my razor that I had not used since what happened with Jonathan. I cut deeply into my skin. As the blood ran down my arm, I kept on doing it. I ran to my bathroom to fix up my arm. I was so glad that I always wore bracelets so it would not look like I did anything.

I threw up the little bit I ate and then I got a shower, which hurt my arm horribly bad. I then got ready for bed and bandaged my arm. I would have to remove them before I go to school tomorrow. It would hurt my brother to know I was doing this horrible thing again.

The last week of school was horrible. Everyone whispered around me and I got death glares including giggles. I just did my exams and that made me feel better. I knew I did well because I had nothing else to do but study. I was also finally able to listen to Kamelot again. I was still cutting but I had only done it once since the last time.

When it was time to go to the Dir En Grey concert, I was feeling much better. I told my brother what I had done but promised I would stop, showed him the scars that were there, and I have to stop wearing more than one bracelet.

I got dressed while thinking about just my time with Dean. He was a great friend along with Adrian and Josh. I was able to sleep and eat now with no problems. I figured why let a jerk like Marius and my ex-friend Diana rule my life. Going to gymnastics helped also.

I heard the ringing of the doorbell. I threw my hair in a loose ponytail as I ran down the stairs to see Dean standing there.

“So Blair, are you ready to go.” He said giving me a lopsided smile.

“Yes, I need to get out of here.” I yelled up the stairs, “Adrian, I’m going now.”

“See you later sis.” I heard and I knew Josh was here too so Adrian would not be lonely.

“So Blair, how have you been?” He asked. I knew this was going to be a long night.

I explained everything, because Dean was my best friend now. The cutting, getting better, and getting back into gymnastics.

“We’re here,” he said as we stopped talking and pulled into a space. We walked into the concert hall and I could not believe what I saw.