Robin, Boy Virgin: Original Series

In Geography, we had a slack day. Mr. Jeffrey spent a half an hour teaching, and the other forty-five minutes drinking coffee and letting us lounge around. I just listened to music and thought about Harold. I wondered if he was going to come to school or not. I know (boy do I know) how hard it is to come to school after you screw up with the girl you like. But I hoped Harold would have the sense to be brave and just plow on ahead.

Amanda was sitting over with her popular friends. There are thirty students in the class, ok, and those four or five popular people were making 90% of the noise. Popular people annoy the shit out of me. Not just because they are really noisy (which is really annoying) but because they feel they are cool enough and uninhibited enough to make all that damn noise. I want to yell “you’re not that fucking cool! Shut UP and let a guy THINK!”

But I didn’t. Cuz I’m not that cool or uninhibited. Siigh. I wished I had my fake gun, though. I’d pretend to pick off the popular douches and douchettes one by one.

At lunch, Cora and I sat together. And, get this, no one else showed up! Max and Clarissa (of course) weren’t there and neither were Harold and Minnie. Harold and Minnie’s absences worried me a little, since I didn’t want either of them to be upset. But I got to be alone with Cora at lunch! Like a lunch date, sort of, not really. I mean, we weren’t really alone (because there were about two hundred other kids in the cafeteria), but we were alone at our table. And get this, Cora didn’t move to sit across the table from me. She kept sitting next to me.

Let’s play Blue's Clues:

1.) Cora shows up this morning and plants a wonderful kiss on me.

2.) She doesn’t want to make me upset. AND more than that, she knows what would make me upset. Her observance of my tendencies was… well observant. Er, yeah.

3.) She said yes to going out on a date with me. And she knows it’s a date: that was a clear thing that I specified.

Ok, Blue, what do those three things mean? Don’t need my thinking chair for this: Cora is way into you. K, great, now could you tell Cora that please?? Because if anyone is living in a delusion anymore, it’s her.

Oh, for the record, I don’t watch Blue's Clues. I just… I just know how the show works.

Anyway, when lunch was over and Cora and I were done drinking pop and playfully fighting over corn chips, we walked to my locker. As I was getting out my music comp binder (and starting to feel excited for the hott make out session that could happen), Harold suddenly appeared, leaning next to the lockers on the other side of me.

“Hey… did you just get here?” I asked him.

“No. I came this morning,” He said tiredly.

“Well where have you been?” I demanded.

“Just at my locker, trying to, you know, keep a low profile. You should have heard me yesterday. Actually, you shouldn’t have, no one should have heard the nervous rambling that came out of my mouth,” Harold said, shaking his head. I gave him a sympathetic look.

“… you know, Harold-” Cora started to say. I looked at her and frowned and cleared my throat while I shook my head abruptly, warning her not to mention that Minnie knew that Harold was going to ask her out.

“Hm?” Harold hummed at her, sounding depressed.

“Uh… nothing,” Cora said, giving Harold a quick, ‘it’s nothing’ smile, and then discreetly and painfully pinched my arm. I ignored her. Well, I knew what she was wanted to say would just make Harold feel worse.

“Uh oh,” Harold suddenly muttered, like the words couldn’t help but come out of his mouth. Cora and I looked over our shoulders and we watched as Minnie came walking purposefully down the hall. Hehe, she’s cute. You should see the way Minnie walks- like she thinks she’s a foot taller than she actually is.

“Hi,” Cora greeted.

“Hi,” Minnie said quickly but then kept walking by. Harold stood up from leaning on the lockers.

“Look, Minnie,” Harold started to say tiredly.

But then Minnie braced her little palm on his chest and pushed him back against the lockers. It was only like an inch. BUT then Minnie got up on her tip toes and planted one of her forceful, shocking kisses on Harold. Right in the freaking hallway! My jaw dropped. I’m sure Cora had a similar look on her face. But I couldn’t tear my eyes away from this scene, whoa!

Minnie drew away from the stunned out of his zen mind Harold. She sighed, like she had satisfyingly cleared up a problem, and gave everyone a smile and then kept on walking!

“I… should have warned you she does that,” I chuckled, thoroughly amused and surprised. Harold blinked at me. He was still totally stunned.

Cora suddenly leaned around me.

“Go after her,” She spelled out clearly for Harold. He blinked again, starting to snap out of it, and turned around and hurried after Minnie. We watched him catch up to Minnie and say something like ‘hello’. But he was grinning like crazy. I looked at Cora and raised my eyebrows.

“Ah amour,” I sighed dreamily. Cora giggled at me. I closed my locker and stuck my elbow out at her. She blinked and then realized to put her hand on my elbow. Like how she always does, come on. We walked to Music Comp, grinning about the scene we'd just witnessed.

“… you know, that’s pretty much how Minnie kissed me,” I said, attempting immaturely to invoke a jealous reaction out of Cora. She just smiled beautifully and giggled.

“She did? What, she rammed you up against a wall?” Cora kept giggling as we walked through the band room. Actually, Cora was the one who has shoved me up against a wall. Two times, I think, if not more.

“Well… not exactly. She had a hold of my hand and just kind of partially pulled me down and partially got up on her toes,” I said honestly. Cora just kept grinning all beautiful and calm. And not jealous.

I suppose in all fairness, I’m obviously not interested in Minnie and she (very obviously) is not interested in me. So, there is no reason to be jealous.

For her. Because I was suddenly jealous of Harold because now he was inevitably going to be in a relationship with Minnie. And he’d get to hold her hand, and tell other weird, Nietzsche reading girls that he was sorry but he already had a girlfriend, and then he’d get to tell Minnie he loved her (because he was going to be in love with her. Harold is that kinda guy, like me, trust). I walked into the practice room, feeling bummed then, because even though I have so many good things with Cora, I don’t have that one thing that I really, really want.

I don’t know if I’m greedy or if Cora is just crazy. Possibly it’s both.

Suddenly, though, Cora braced her hand on my chest and pushed me against the wall. Ow, kind of painfully.

“Hey this is familiar,” I noted, partly teasing, partly serious, and partly all ready to make out as my jealousy and greed and worry flew out the window. Cora smiled at me and leaned in close. But she didn’t kiss me right away. Oh, I see. It’s to be torture is it?

“Minnie is take charge. I like her attitude,” Cora informed me in her husky, sexy voice. Man, I remember when she first did this to me and I stared at her eyelashes and her eyes, pretending I wasn’t totally in love with her. Well, I’m not pretending anymore. And, bonus, this encounter now would end in super hott making out.

“Me too,” I agreed, my smile coming out crooked. Cora smiled. She has pretty teeth even.

“Harold is lucky to have Minnie,” Cora said, nodding and x-raying me with her blue eyes.

“Yeah. He is,” I said, getting kind of thoughtful and managing to look away from Cora’s face. Since I was reminded of my jealousy and got kind of sad that Harold got to have the girl he was crazy about be his girlfriend. Cora put her hand on my face, though, to turn me to look at her again. Then she lifted her mouth to mine and started kissing me. After that, things felt much better again.