‹ Prequel: The Dark Witch
The Return of the Dark Witch
Gazing
P.O.V – Maria Le Fay
The Great Hall was loud and crowded, and did I mention loud and crowded? It had been years since I had seen this many people all flocked together. So different from the isolation of my little cell in the asylum. I mean, sure I had seen all these same people on the train and throughout the castle, but this? This was different it was massive and…
I felt sweat forming on my palms as I eyed the other students in the Great Hall. Each and every one of them preoccupied in their own boring lives, as they chatted amongst themselves. I watched as Astoria skipped gleefully, and in my opinion rather senselessly, into the Great Hall just ahead of me.
As much as I despised such ignorance, I admired it in a way I couldn't understand, to be so unaware. All of them, not just Astoria, who I think was more aware then she let on, were so blissfully ignorant. I never have been, I've never been allowed to be. I wish I could have been. Such blissfulness, such complete ignorance, is something to be treasured and clung to as much as possible. Shame I've never had that luxury.
I took a step inside the Great Hall, pausing at the entrance to look around idly at the tables. Internally judging each and every person in the hall. As well as forming impossible catastrophic scenarios in my head so that I would be ready for them, if and when they occurred. I would not be caught up in some sort of stampede.
I drew in a sharp breath as I turned my head slightly to see Draco Malfoy. He was standing only a yard or two away from me, but with all the students packed in here, it almost seemed like miles. He was talking to pug face and the Daphne cow, but that didn't matter. What mattered was my earlier out burst with him that came flooding back into my brain the second I laid eyes on him. It wasn't like me to lose it like that with anyone. I had always prided myself on my self control and there I had gone, spilling my guts to Draco. Even if it had been to my benefit of receiving magic lessons from him in a couple hours time, it was still…, embarrassing.
I watched as he lifted his head suddenly, his gaze locking with mine, and I felt this weird feeling form in the pit in my stomach as we stared at each other. I love Sirius with all my heart, but there was just something about Draco. When I look into his eyes, it's like…it's almost like I can see myself in them. For I see all the pain, fear, and anger in those grey eyes of his that I see when I look at my own reflection.
A beat past and I still couldn't look away, transfixed. It took all the willpower I had to finally tear my eyes off of him, just as he turned back to speaking to Parkinson and the wretched Daphne. I sighed a little to myself as I turned away, raising my head slightly and stiffening my jaw. I wasn't weak, I didn't give a darn about Draco Malfoy other than using him to see Sirius, and I was going to go over to the Slytherin table with my head held high if it killed me to do it.
With those thoughts in mind, I proudly began to make my way over to the Slytherin table, ignoring all the many looks I got from the other students. Most of them going quiet as I passed, but some whispering amongst themselves, Ron Weasley, Harry's friend, being the loudest of these whisperers,
"Just goes to show it doesn't matter how pretty the girl is…"
"Ron," shushed Hermione Granger, Harry's other friend, "we liked her."
"I know, really makes you feel betrayed doesn't it?" Replied Ron sharply.
"Knock it off, Ron." Said Harry firmly, causing me to look at him, only to find him staring at me with an intense, almost curious, expression on his face. I bit my lip, and quickly looked away, I wasn't ready to deal with my godson yet, I could barely deal with myself.
Hurriedly, I finished making my way to the Slytherin table, plastering a fake smirk on my face as I sat myself down at the end, "Hello, all." I said sarcastically, upon noticing all the looks I was getting from my fellow Slytherins, leers from the guys, and 'if looks could kill' looks from the girls. I leaned forward, looking back down the table at them all, "Isn't this a fine afternoon?" I said in the fakest cheeriest voice I could muster as I scrunched my nose. Shaking my head a little, I leaned back into my seat, shrugging my right shoulder and winking at the tall dark skinned guy sitting across, and a few seats over, from me.
I smirked a little to myself upon seeing his mildly taken back expression, and looking away, turned my head to see Snape glaring down at me from his seat at the staff table. My face darkened instantly, and I met him with a glare of my own. How dare he even look at me, after everything he's done!
We held our staring contest for a moment or two, before he was forced to look away by Dumbledore, who promptly engaged him in a discussion. I tilted my head slightly, as I watched the look on Snape's face turn even grimmer then it had when he had been looking at me. What could possibly…
I felt a hand grasp me on the shoulder, wrenching it and causing me to twist to the right in my seat. A surprised expression formed on my face, quickly followed livid one. My eyes flashing darkly as I looked up to see the person I would find some way to kill in the next couple of seconds.
"Sinclair," Began pug face smartly, a self satisfied expression on her face as she stared down at me, "I know I've been cutting you some slack because you're new…"
"Slack?" I replied, frowning, most of my basic anger draining away from me for the time being. Now was not the time for it, or my revenge. With mock curiosity, I leaned forward in my seat and cupped my chin with my left hand, "What's your idea of slack? Trying to curse me several times?" I asked sarcastically, ignoring the frown pug face's backup, the cow Daphne, gave me.
Parkinson sniffed the air huffily, "Pity spells, really." She leaned forward a little, "Just trying to show you the error of your ways, and, apparently, that didn't take."
My frowned deepened as I sat there, confused, "Um…what are you talking about?"
Pug face's eyes flashed, "My darling Draco, of course!" She shrieked, "You're after him, aren't you? Go on, admit it! You're trying to steal him away!"
My eyes widened. Well, that was unexpected. The pug really thinks I'm trying to steal her little boyfriend. I've already got a husband, thanks. I don't need another guy hanging around for my father to torture too. Plus, um, hello? Sirius? Love of my life? Yeah, I'm pretty much settled. "You're insane." I replied calmly, "I don't give a darn about your little idiot boyfriend." I said in a convincing dry tone, ignoring a little lump that seemed form in my stomach at the words. It was in that moment, I looked up to see Draco, standing not too far away, over Daphne's shoulder. His face seemed almost crest fallen for a moment, before it quickly righted to proud smirk.
"He is not an idiot!" Shrieked Parkinson, outraged, "He is anything but…" She continued on for another moment or two, but I wasn't paying any attention to her. My eyes still fixed on Draco, who was quickly advancing over to me, the wretch, and the pug.
"You aren't even paying attention! What are you staring at?" Said pug face loudly, turning to see Draco, now standing next to her, "Oh you're doing that creepy eye gazing across the room thing again." She turned back to me, glaring, "Which just shows you're not listening to me at all!"
"Pansy, pet," Began Draco soothingly, his eyes not wavering from my own, a dark gleam in them, as he brushed Parkinson's hair back from her shoulder, "Why are you bothering with this wretch?" His eyes flickered darkly, before turning away from me to look at Parkinson. Who, in turn, was staring at him with an ardent expression on her face (her mind, most likely, hadn't moved past 'pet').
"But…" Pug face stuttered, obviously flustered by the first reciprocated affection she had probably seen from him ever, "You've been staring at her, Draco. You…you…" She stumbled off as Draco leaned in, and with what I almost could have sworn was a glance at me, placed a light kiss on her lips.
I stared at the scene, stunned, unable to look away, a weird feeling forming in the pit of my stomach. I could vaguely see the cow Daphne staring smugly down at me from behind Draco and Parkinson, but I didn't really care. She wasn't important right now, and neither were the jeers that were coming from the rest of the table.
"Draco…" Cooed the pug, running her hand along the side of his face lovingly.
Draco smiled back at her, one could almost believe it was genuine, but I knew differently. I had seen that smile before, I had used it myself, and it was anything but genuine. I watched, blankly, as he swiveled back to me, "See that, Sinclair?" He began, sneering, "You haven't got a chance." And with that, he wrapped his arm around Parkinson's waist, and together they strolled off to the other side of the Slytherin table.
I couldn't help it; my gaze followed him. A lump forming in my throat to match the raging one in my stomach, I have no idea what's wrong with me...
A loud humph, drew my attention away from Draco and Parkinson, and I turned to watch Daphne smirk smugly down at me, before walking off to join the pair. I slumped back in my seat, looking down wildly at the floor, blood pounding away in my ears. Unconsciously, I reached up to play with my rings that hung low around my neck. What was wrong with me?
The Great Hall was loud and crowded, and did I mention loud and crowded? It had been years since I had seen this many people all flocked together. So different from the isolation of my little cell in the asylum. I mean, sure I had seen all these same people on the train and throughout the castle, but this? This was different it was massive and…
I felt sweat forming on my palms as I eyed the other students in the Great Hall. Each and every one of them preoccupied in their own boring lives, as they chatted amongst themselves. I watched as Astoria skipped gleefully, and in my opinion rather senselessly, into the Great Hall just ahead of me.
As much as I despised such ignorance, I admired it in a way I couldn't understand, to be so unaware. All of them, not just Astoria, who I think was more aware then she let on, were so blissfully ignorant. I never have been, I've never been allowed to be. I wish I could have been. Such blissfulness, such complete ignorance, is something to be treasured and clung to as much as possible. Shame I've never had that luxury.
I took a step inside the Great Hall, pausing at the entrance to look around idly at the tables. Internally judging each and every person in the hall. As well as forming impossible catastrophic scenarios in my head so that I would be ready for them, if and when they occurred. I would not be caught up in some sort of stampede.
I drew in a sharp breath as I turned my head slightly to see Draco Malfoy. He was standing only a yard or two away from me, but with all the students packed in here, it almost seemed like miles. He was talking to pug face and the Daphne cow, but that didn't matter. What mattered was my earlier out burst with him that came flooding back into my brain the second I laid eyes on him. It wasn't like me to lose it like that with anyone. I had always prided myself on my self control and there I had gone, spilling my guts to Draco. Even if it had been to my benefit of receiving magic lessons from him in a couple hours time, it was still…, embarrassing.
I watched as he lifted his head suddenly, his gaze locking with mine, and I felt this weird feeling form in the pit in my stomach as we stared at each other. I love Sirius with all my heart, but there was just something about Draco. When I look into his eyes, it's like…it's almost like I can see myself in them. For I see all the pain, fear, and anger in those grey eyes of his that I see when I look at my own reflection.
A beat past and I still couldn't look away, transfixed. It took all the willpower I had to finally tear my eyes off of him, just as he turned back to speaking to Parkinson and the wretched Daphne. I sighed a little to myself as I turned away, raising my head slightly and stiffening my jaw. I wasn't weak, I didn't give a darn about Draco Malfoy other than using him to see Sirius, and I was going to go over to the Slytherin table with my head held high if it killed me to do it.
With those thoughts in mind, I proudly began to make my way over to the Slytherin table, ignoring all the many looks I got from the other students. Most of them going quiet as I passed, but some whispering amongst themselves, Ron Weasley, Harry's friend, being the loudest of these whisperers,
"Just goes to show it doesn't matter how pretty the girl is…"
"Ron," shushed Hermione Granger, Harry's other friend, "we liked her."
"I know, really makes you feel betrayed doesn't it?" Replied Ron sharply.
"Knock it off, Ron." Said Harry firmly, causing me to look at him, only to find him staring at me with an intense, almost curious, expression on his face. I bit my lip, and quickly looked away, I wasn't ready to deal with my godson yet, I could barely deal with myself.
Hurriedly, I finished making my way to the Slytherin table, plastering a fake smirk on my face as I sat myself down at the end, "Hello, all." I said sarcastically, upon noticing all the looks I was getting from my fellow Slytherins, leers from the guys, and 'if looks could kill' looks from the girls. I leaned forward, looking back down the table at them all, "Isn't this a fine afternoon?" I said in the fakest cheeriest voice I could muster as I scrunched my nose. Shaking my head a little, I leaned back into my seat, shrugging my right shoulder and winking at the tall dark skinned guy sitting across, and a few seats over, from me.
I smirked a little to myself upon seeing his mildly taken back expression, and looking away, turned my head to see Snape glaring down at me from his seat at the staff table. My face darkened instantly, and I met him with a glare of my own. How dare he even look at me, after everything he's done!
We held our staring contest for a moment or two, before he was forced to look away by Dumbledore, who promptly engaged him in a discussion. I tilted my head slightly, as I watched the look on Snape's face turn even grimmer then it had when he had been looking at me. What could possibly…
I felt a hand grasp me on the shoulder, wrenching it and causing me to twist to the right in my seat. A surprised expression formed on my face, quickly followed livid one. My eyes flashing darkly as I looked up to see the person I would find some way to kill in the next couple of seconds.
"Sinclair," Began pug face smartly, a self satisfied expression on her face as she stared down at me, "I know I've been cutting you some slack because you're new…"
"Slack?" I replied, frowning, most of my basic anger draining away from me for the time being. Now was not the time for it, or my revenge. With mock curiosity, I leaned forward in my seat and cupped my chin with my left hand, "What's your idea of slack? Trying to curse me several times?" I asked sarcastically, ignoring the frown pug face's backup, the cow Daphne, gave me.
Parkinson sniffed the air huffily, "Pity spells, really." She leaned forward a little, "Just trying to show you the error of your ways, and, apparently, that didn't take."
My frowned deepened as I sat there, confused, "Um…what are you talking about?"
Pug face's eyes flashed, "My darling Draco, of course!" She shrieked, "You're after him, aren't you? Go on, admit it! You're trying to steal him away!"
My eyes widened. Well, that was unexpected. The pug really thinks I'm trying to steal her little boyfriend. I've already got a husband, thanks. I don't need another guy hanging around for my father to torture too. Plus, um, hello? Sirius? Love of my life? Yeah, I'm pretty much settled. "You're insane." I replied calmly, "I don't give a darn about your little idiot boyfriend." I said in a convincing dry tone, ignoring a little lump that seemed form in my stomach at the words. It was in that moment, I looked up to see Draco, standing not too far away, over Daphne's shoulder. His face seemed almost crest fallen for a moment, before it quickly righted to proud smirk.
"He is not an idiot!" Shrieked Parkinson, outraged, "He is anything but…" She continued on for another moment or two, but I wasn't paying any attention to her. My eyes still fixed on Draco, who was quickly advancing over to me, the wretch, and the pug.
"You aren't even paying attention! What are you staring at?" Said pug face loudly, turning to see Draco, now standing next to her, "Oh you're doing that creepy eye gazing across the room thing again." She turned back to me, glaring, "Which just shows you're not listening to me at all!"
"Pansy, pet," Began Draco soothingly, his eyes not wavering from my own, a dark gleam in them, as he brushed Parkinson's hair back from her shoulder, "Why are you bothering with this wretch?" His eyes flickered darkly, before turning away from me to look at Parkinson. Who, in turn, was staring at him with an ardent expression on her face (her mind, most likely, hadn't moved past 'pet').
"But…" Pug face stuttered, obviously flustered by the first reciprocated affection she had probably seen from him ever, "You've been staring at her, Draco. You…you…" She stumbled off as Draco leaned in, and with what I almost could have sworn was a glance at me, placed a light kiss on her lips.
I stared at the scene, stunned, unable to look away, a weird feeling forming in the pit of my stomach. I could vaguely see the cow Daphne staring smugly down at me from behind Draco and Parkinson, but I didn't really care. She wasn't important right now, and neither were the jeers that were coming from the rest of the table.
"Draco…" Cooed the pug, running her hand along the side of his face lovingly.
Draco smiled back at her, one could almost believe it was genuine, but I knew differently. I had seen that smile before, I had used it myself, and it was anything but genuine. I watched, blankly, as he swiveled back to me, "See that, Sinclair?" He began, sneering, "You haven't got a chance." And with that, he wrapped his arm around Parkinson's waist, and together they strolled off to the other side of the Slytherin table.
I couldn't help it; my gaze followed him. A lump forming in my throat to match the raging one in my stomach, I have no idea what's wrong with me...
A loud humph, drew my attention away from Draco and Parkinson, and I turned to watch Daphne smirk smugly down at me, before walking off to join the pair. I slumped back in my seat, looking down wildly at the floor, blood pounding away in my ears. Unconsciously, I reached up to play with my rings that hung low around my neck. What was wrong with me?