I Swear I Love You

Brian’s POV

“Oh shit…”This comment had followed after something crashed near to where I was currently laying, trying vainly to sleep. Instinctively I just groaned and turned on my other side to try and block out the noise that had woken me, but as it happens the person who caused it decided to follow a different idea- and made more noise. “Fuck!”

By now, the numbness that sleeping on the couch had given me over the last few nights forced me to get up, my muscles aching from having to cramp myself onto the makeshift bed. I stretched them out as best I could before I walked back into the kitchen area, stifling a yawn with my hand.

“For fuck’s sake!” It seemed at this early hour Zack hadn’t woken up enough to realise I was there- that or he was too preoccupied with trying to pick up all the broken fragments of the mug littered across the floor. I bent down and picked up a few of the pieces and set them on the side before I spoke.

“If you were aiming for the counter, you missed.”

Startled, all the pieces that he had since collected fell once again to the floor. “Shit Syn!” He shook his head as he exhaled, laughing nervously. “You scared the shit out of me!” He began to pick up the shattered mug shards once again. “What are you doing up this early? We’re not hitting Houston until 12.”

I shrugged. “Can’t sleep. What about you? I’ve never seen the Vengeance surface before 10, let alone half seven in the morning.”

“Well…” He grinned sheepishly. “With the time zones and everything, this is one of the few times I can speak to Coral.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You’ve been talking to her?” Crossing my arms across my chest, I moved and leant against the side. “For how long? What’s the time over there now?”

“Well it’s just gone about half ten at night over there…” He glanced between the clock and his fingers, muttering under his breath. “…and we were talking since she got off work at six, so…” He looked up at me. “Like five hours?”

I stared at him. “You’ve been awake for the past five hours?”

“Not exactly…” He trailed off and began to scratch at the back of his neck. “I only really came in here to get a drink.”

“So…” From the state of him right now, the broken mug and the coffee going on the side I could easily guess at what he wasn’t telling me. “You haven’t slept at all, have you?”

“Eheh… nope.” He frowned when he saw my expression drop. “You’re not… you don’t think I was being stupid do you?”

“Hmm?” I shook my head. “Actually, I’m just pissed off.”

He recoiled.

“Because if you weren’t going to use your bunk, you could’ve at least fucking told me!” I groaned. “Do you know how uncomfortable that piece of shit is to sleep on? Ugh… Fuck! A free bed…” Zack just laughed at my agony. “It’s fucking serious you know! My back’s been killing me.”

“You shouldn’t have offered your bunk to Jess then!” He chuckled, clearly not seeing the guilt flash across my eyes. After what I had done to her it was the least I could do. “Well then go catch a few hours in it now then!”

“What about you?”

By this point the broken mug was sealed in a bag and thrown in the bin and a new one filled with coffee was in his hand. “Nah, I’m not going to need it.”

“You’re going to talk to that Coral chick again?”

He winked at me. “It’s not late over there yet, now is it?”

--

“Brian!”

Ignoring the call I rolled over onto my other side, refusing to wake up. It had taken three painful nights of sleeping on some concrete couch until I managed to get back onto a bunk, so from where I was, everyone could just fuck off.

“Brian!” They were poking me in the back now, but I still refused to acknowledge them. “Brian!”

“Let me sleep,” I grumbled, swatting at whoever was behind me.

“No.”

The next thing I know I tumbled out of Zack’s bunk onto the floor. I must have landed on someone since I heard a yelp of pain, causing me to smile before I had even bothered to open my eyes. That’s called karma. Sweet, sweet karma.

“I’m glad you find it funny; that had only just gotten better!” I opened my eyes to see Jess above me, her hand pressed against the bunk behind her as she kept her weight off the foot I must have fallen on.

“Oh God Jess, I’m so sorr-!”

“Oh don’t bother Brian,” she snapped. She began to limp away before I could get to my feet to stop her, shouting back at me the reason why I had to get up. “Sound check is in twenty minutes, so hurry up and get changed! The others are waiting!”

I sighed as she disappeared up the front of the bus, falling back onto the bunk with a sigh, my head falling into my hands. Jess hadn’t talked to me ever since a week ago in San Diego, and the first time she does, I manage to fuck it up again.

Another sigh escaped as I began to drag my clothes on ready to meet the others.

Could this day seriously get any worse?

--

Jess’s POV

“Hey what’s wrong?” Jimmy moved across the stage and jumped down to where I was after his sound check was over. I had only just hobbled into the pits to watch them after I had spent the past half an hour trying to find the support for my ankle I had finally managed to take off this morning. Well, that was before Brian fell on it. “I thought you didn’t need that support anymore?”

“Well I didn’t,” I replied. I slumped onto the floor and agitated my ankle as I did it, twisting it in some position it certainly wasn’t happy about. A grimace emerged as the pain shot up my leg. “Until now.”

“Until now?” He repeated, looking confused. “You didn’t fall on it again, did you?”

Instantly I looked at Brian who, in the same second, had averted his gaze. “Well I didn’t fall on it…” I could tell from the way he began to play that he was trying to drown out our voices- in a massive stadium like this that is currently empty; you only had to whisper to have it to echo for everyone to hear. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll live.”

“You really should take more care of yourself,” he commented with a shake of his head. Obviously he thought it was my fault; funnily enough it was everything but my fault. Namely it was everything that was Brian. “First you don’t call one of us to help you in the first place, and now you’ve gone and hurt yourself again.” He sighed. “I’m worried to even take my eyes off you.”

I thought for a moment before I reached over and slapped my hands over his eyes. “Hey what are you doing?!” He began to try and peel my fingers off, but I wasn’t letting up. “Jess I can’t see!”

“That’s the point.” I removed them from his eyes and instead cupped his cheeks. “You can take your eyes off me. I don’t need to be protected all the time. I’m not a damsel in distress.”

Letting them fall back to my sides with a smile I pushed off the ground and onto my feet- or at least I did until I accidentally overbalanced and managed to agitate my ankle once again. I couldn’t help but cry out as my leg buckled underneath me, but even when I closed my eyes out of pure instinct to block out the fall, I never did.

When I opened them once again, I saw that Jimmy had managed to catch me in his arms before I even grazed it. Even now, he held me in his arms, making sure that I supported only the barest minimum of my weight.

“You say stuff like that, and then you go ahead and pull a stunt like this?” He laughed. “You are a textbook princess Jess.”

“Textbook princess?”

“Damn straight.” He reached down and swung me onto his back before I could stop him, holding my legs in place as I rested my arms around his neck. “Everyone stops just because you break a nail.” When I complained that I never did anything about that he just stopped me. “It’s only an expression Jess. Then again, you should get treated like this.”

I looked down at him oddly as he began to walk back to the stage where the sound check had since stopped to await our arrival. “Why is that?”

He stopped and turned his head to look at me. “Because I’m meant to be your prince right?” Even though he didn’t show it off, I swear the ring on his finger suddenly sparkled just to get my attention. “I’m meant to look after you.”

As he began to walk again I rested my head against his shoulder, his words replaying in my head.

I’m meant to be your prince right?

Prince? What did he mean by that? I mean, it’s not like we’re together or anything- well, we were, but we’re getting divorced in a few months. That marriage was a mistake, so I don’t see why he would say something like that. He doesn’t have to look out for me. A piece of paper wouldn’t make anyone do anything. Unless he’s doing it because he wants to…

I raised my head to speak. “Hey… Jimmy?”

He stopped again. “Yeah?”

“What did you mean by that prince thing?”

“Oh.” He started to walk again, gravitating to the steps leading up to the stage. “Well we’re meant to be married right? A husband is meant to look out for his partner.”

“But it’s not real!”

“It’s real now so…” He shrugged. “So I’m going to be a good husband until it’s not. Don’t worry, you’re only stuck with my name for a few more months, then you’re free to do whatever you want!”

“Yeah…” My head lowered once again, finding the groove in his shoulder that just seemed to be moulded to greet me.

I don’t know why, but for some reason I wanted a different answer from him.

Is that wrong?