I Swear I Love You

Brian’s POV

“Have you heard from Jess yet?”

Shaking my head I looked at the young bassist as we were going through our sound checks. It had been a week since Jess had just suddenly decided to uproot from the bus and just leave- I don’t even know what had triggered it. Well, I knew that something had happened between her and Jim but Zack couldn’t tell me because he didn’t know, and Johnny was keeping his mouth shut. There wasn’t even a point in asking Larry, since any mention of those two made him see red.

“Nothing. She left her cell behind.”

“And she didn’t say where she was going?”

I sighed. I had repeated this numerous times now, and thinking about how I let her leave just made me feel guilty. Somehow, I should have stopped her. That’s what I’m meant to do; as her b- well. I don’t know what to call me. Some feelings shouldn’t mix. “No, she didn’t. She just waved down a cab, got into it and left.”

“Alright Jim, you’re turn!” Jason yelled out.

As a result both Johnny and I turned to watch him. His playing hadn’t been affected in the slightest but there just seemed to be something missing from him now. Like his presence had gone. Before he used to come onto the stage and you could literally feel the energy roll off him but now it was like there was just enough to keep his heart beating.

Jason raised his hand to get him to stop. “Alright, you’re all good! That’s a rap guys!”

We passed off our instruments to the roadies and began to leave the stage, Jimmy as usual the first to leave just like he was always the first for sound check even though he was always last. Since the hotel incident he hadn’t said anything about it at all, and even though he was acting like himself you could tell there was something wrong inside. Val as always tried to find out for herself but ended up with absolutely nothing, just like the rest of us. This just made her try harder but Jimmy just managed to dodge the subject each and every time it came up.

“Well at least we have a day to explore before your show,” Val mused as we were walking out of the venue together. “What should we do?”

“We could always try and get into Disneyland,” Zack offered. We all just stared at him. His voice dropped. “Would be fun.” Bless him. He’d wanted to go there ever since he was small. Hell no if I was though. Waiting in some line for like two hours for a twenty second ride? They could go fuck themselves from where I’m standing.

“Give over Zack, there’s more to Orlando than Disneyland,” Val remarked with a roll of her eyes. “Plus I’m not wasting this nice weather in a line.”

Something about what she said struck me. “Val, what did you say again?”

She blinked at me, confused. “Err… that I’m not going to spend a nice sunny day in a line?”

“Before that.”

“That there’s more to Orlando-”

“That’s it!” I yelled out suddenly, freaking her out. “I know where she is!”

“Where who is?” I was already running off by this point. “Where who is?”

“Jess!” I shouted over my shoulder. “I’ll meet up with you guys later!”

--

“Do you even know where the fuck you are going?”

“That’s why you’re here.” I took one hand off the wheel and tapped the map balanced on Zack’s lap. “You’re telling me where I’ve got to go.”

“I’ll tell you where to go,” he grumbled, glancing between the map and the road signs we passed. “I’ll tell you where you can go so I can shove this map right up your-”

“What was that?” I interrupted cheerfully. Originally Johnny said he would come but I guess Jim must have heard me talking about finding Jess and seemed to down spiral again, so he decided to stay behind with him. Zack came instead, which he wasn’t too ecstatic about, especially when Matt and Val finally agreed to check out a nearby water park he had suggested. At least that was until I stole him.

“Nothing.” He guided me at each intersection until we pulled in front of a house in the rather ironic suburb name of Winter Springs. At least when it was sunny it appeared ironic. “Just here. 1077 Winding Waters, Winter Springs.” He glanced up at the house and whistled. “Sheesh. That’s one nice place.”

Indeed it was. Jess’ family wasn’t exactly outright wealthy but it was wrong to say that they weren’t well-off. Their old house in Huntington was nice but this one… geez. I’d love a house like that one day.

“How the hell did you manage to get the address for Jess’ parents anyway?” Zack asked as we walked up their drive to the front door. “I thought they moved when Jess was in Australia.”

“Well, they did,” I replied, knocking on the door. “I just asked a friend.”

His eyebrow rose, a trace of doubt evident in his voice. “A friend?”

Thankfully I didn’t have to go into details as the door opened and revealed a slender female, wearing only a crop top and some denim shorts. Zack was taken aback at the sheer resemblance she had. It was just like looking at another Jess; albeit a slightly taller one. “Yes?”

I smiled. “Hey Holly. Remember me?”

“I don’t…” She trailed off as she analysed me, her face slowly changing from confusion to surprise. “Brian?” I grinned to let her know she was right. “Oh my God!” She literally jumped onto me, wrapping her arms around my neck in a large hug. “It’s been like forever!”

“It hasn’t been that long,” I laughed.

“It’s been like a year!” She exclaimed. “That’s long enough!” She grabbed onto my arm and started to drag me into the house. “Come in! I’ve just made brownies.”

I simply chuckled at her, allowing myself to be dragged through the halls of her home. “What are you, trying to win housewife of the year or something?”

She huffed. “You never change; you’re so mean.” She dropped my arm from her grasp as we entered the kitchen, waving at the plate of steaming brownies on the side. “Help yourself. Would you like a drink?”

“Yeah, if you don’t mind.”

“What would you like?”

“Whatever. Orange juice or something.”

“Orange juice my ass,” she muttered, pulling out two bottle easily recognisable as containing beer. She passed the bottles between the two of us now sitting at a small table, realising that when she turned to Zack she didn’t actually know him. “Oh sorry! I’m Holly.” She struck a hand out. “It’s nice to meet one of Brian’s friends.”

“Zacky,” he replied warmly, taking her hand. “Thanks for the beer.”

“Oh it’s no problem, if you’re anything like Brian then you prefer beer over anything and everything,” she stated, tearing a section off a brownie and tossing it in her mouth. “But not sex. Brian would gladly give up beer for sex.”

Zack choked when she said that. I just laughed. “He’s only just met you Holls, you need to tone it down slightly.”

“But that’s just not me though, now is it?” She raised her arms above her head and stretched them before she dropped them to the floor, brushing her fingers against her toes before straightening again. I must have been giving her a weird look because she placed her hand on her hip and frowned. “What?”

“Nothing,” I said, shaking my head. God, for a moment then I could have sworn…

She grinned. “Is someone feeling a little hot today?” She crossed the kitchen and stood behind where I was sitting leaning in close so that her breasts were pushing against my back. Her lips were whispering barely an inch from my ear, her warm breath tickling my skin. “Perhaps I should help you calm down.”

Zack coughed to get our attention, looking extremely uncomfortable. Well, I guess for anyone who didn’t know this was just how Holly was they would feel the same. She wasn’t shy of using her female assets to her advantage- although she certainly wasn’t one of those girls who opened her legs for anyone. No, what she would do is to take you in with her charm and then trap you there. Only if she liked you back would you ever see the true person Holly was, but that was rare. It’s hard to match perfection, I can tell you that.

“Sorry,” she apologised backing away. She walked around to the other side and leaned in, resting her elbows against the table in such a way that just emphasised her cleavage. “I’m really sorry.”

This time, I coughed. “Come on Holly. That’s enough.”

“Aw, you’re not fun,” she whined, a soft pout touching her lips. “You’re such a party-pooper.” She slumped onto a nearby chair, still sulking. “Why are you here then? You’re obviously not here to see me.”

“It’s about Jess.” Her gaze instantly saddened at the mention of her older sister. Jess was like the perfect role model to Holly, and she was the perfect little sister in return. She did everything she could for Jess, since she knew that her sister would do it all, and a lot more, for her in return. “Do you know where she is?”

Holly’s bubbly personality that she shared with her sister vanished in an instant. “She’s out the back.” We followed her gaze out the kitchen window to see a small figure hunched on the side of the pool there, their feet swinging sadly in the water’s surface. “She’s been like this ever since she turned up here. She didn’t even have any clothes or anything. Mom and Dad had to take her to the hospital to get her some more insulin and stuff.” Her gaze dropped. “She hasn’t said a word. Not to Mom, not to Dad, not to-” She choked on her words then, a few tears grazing her periwinkle eyes. “Not even to me. Her sister.” They began to fall then so I quickly abandoned the table and wrapped my arms around her.

“Don’t be sad Holly,” I murmured, brushing my fingers through her hair. “Come on Holls…”

Her grip around me tightened as she sobbed uncontrollably. “Why is she like this Brian?” She looked up at me tearfully. “Is that why you came? Do you know why?”

I pulled back and held her at arm’s length. “Well not exactly…”

“Not exactly?”

“Well I did come for Jess, but I don’t know why,” I explained. “She ran out on us so I want to find out what happened. Has she done anything? Given you anything at all?”

At first she shook her head, but then must have remembered something since she broke my embrace in order to reach for her pocket. “She gave me this on the day she got here…” She held up a gold band. Her wedding band. “I don’t know what it means though.” By the looks of it, I must have let something loose in my expression. “Brian… tell me. Please… I have to know how to help my big sister.”

That despair… I’ve had it before. It’s what every person has when their sibling is in trouble and you don’t know how to help. It’s like when my little sister was admitted to hospital for tonsillitis and she was scared and just kept crying to come home… All I could do was hug her and tell her it would all be alright, because I couldn’t do anything else.

I was helpless, waiting for someone to give me the answer to make it all better. Just like Holly now.

“Well when Jess first came over from Australia…” I told her the whole story from start to finish, including the diabetic scares, the tour, even how she managed to knock herself out on Jimmy’s bass drum leading up until this moment after her argument with him. “…and that’s why we came here. Jess just ran out and I need to find out what’s wrong.” Throughout the time I spoke Holly said nothing. “I know it’s a lot to take in but I need your help Hol-”

“Take me to him.” Her expression was stoic. “This Jimmy person. Take me to him.”

“I’m not sure if that’s a good idea…”

She stood up sharply. “I wasn’t asking.”

As she walked off I couldn’t help but glance at Zack, who was biting his lip. Did I really come here and made things better or did I just open a whole can of new shit to pile on everything?