I Swear I Love You

“Jess, are you not hungry?”

All eyes shifted to the silent female sat at the end of the table, her downcast gaze staring at an untouched plate. She hadn’t even moved to touch her fork.

To her left, Jimmy gave her a soft nudge. “You should probably eat Jess; you know how your diabetes can-”

“I know very well what my diabetes can do!” She snapped, the sudden change from brooding silence to pure rage taking everyone back. It was as if her quiet stage was the calm before the storm- literally. “Funnily enough, I’ve had to live with it for the past seven years!” She stood up angrily and left the table without another word, pausing only to grab her bag from the back of the chair before deserting the café in favour of a spot on the sand.

Val moved to peer over the wooden barrier down at the beach, frowning at Jess’ curled up frame by the water. “What the hell brought that on?” She turned back to the guys, accusing each of them equally. “What has happened?”

Jimmy shrugged, throwing his hands up in innocence. “I haven’t said anything; I swear.”

“Well something has happened,” Val said, turning back to look down at Jess. “She’s never snapped before.”

“I don’t even think I’ve heard her raise her voice before,” Zacky added, rising from his seat to join Val. “Shouldn’t someone go down and see if she’s alright?”

“I’ll go,” Jimmy offered, beginning to get up.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Val murmured, noticing the sullen posture of the girl. Considering Jimmy was the one she snapped at it was probably better if someone else went. “Matt; why don’t you go?”

Halfway through a mouthful of burger, he looked up at his girlfriend, eyes wide. “What? Why?!”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Don’t talk with your mouth full.”

He swallowed what was left before repeating himself. “Why me?”

“Is there a reason for you not to go?”

He opened his mouth to reply but after realising he had no answer, and subsequently shut it again. Matt knew better to argue with her and swiftly fled from the table despite his half-eaten burger still on his plate, following in Jess’ footsteps down onto the beach. He tried to keep a smile on his face as he sat down beside her, trying to not make it too obvious that he just really wanted to go back and eat.

As soon as he was beside her, Jess let out a quiet laugh. “I can hear your stomach Matt.”

He grinned. “Was it that loud?”

“Just a little.” Bringing her knees closer to her chest, she rested her chin upon them, staring out to the sea. “You know you can go back if you want, I don’t mind.” When he didn’t move, she laughed again. “I’m guessing Val sent you down here? I’m already guessing the answer is yes because I can see them all looking down here.”

Matt glanced up and saw what she was on about; noting the fact his friends weren’t really being very tactful in their actions. He suppressed a sigh as he turned away; knowing that up there, slowly getting colder, was a burger he only got to eat half of.

As if reading his mind, Nathalie spoke up again. “I’m sorry if Val took you away from your burger.”

“Eh, don’t worry about it,” Matt dismissed, waving it off with his hand. “I can get another. I am wondering something though.”

“What’s that?”

“How come you just snapped up there?” Her arms tightened around her knees as he spoke. “I may not have known you as long as Brian, but I can tell that you don’t normally get angry at things. Hell, this is the first time I’ve seen you actually get angry at something.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Aw come on Jess, you can talk to me. I know I might not be the best person to get advice from but I do care about my friends. I don’t like to see them upset.”

Her hard expression softened slightly at his last comment, finally allowing it to break with a forlorn sigh. “I’ve just been thinking.”

“About what?”

“About going to stay with my parents’ for a bit up in Florida. I feel like I’ve overstayed my welcome down here.”

“What makes you think that?” Matt pressed. “Is something wrong at Jim’s?”

“No… It’s not that,” she said, shaking her head. “It’s just that…” She sighed again. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Come on, you can talk to me. I won’t say anything to the others if you don’t want me to.”

Her gaze lifted from her feet to his. “You promise?” He nodded. “Well… It’s something that Johnny said to me after the meeting. It’s just made everything feel a bit weird.”

“A bit weird?”

She shifted uncomfortably. “He said that Zacky, Brian and Jimmy have a thing for me.”

“Christ said that?” Matt said incredulously. “Where did he get that idea from?”

“I don’t know. It’s just made me think that perhaps I’m getting a bit too friendly with the band. I don’t want to be the reason if anything bad happens between you guys. I’m not worth it.”

“Hey, don’t say something like that,” Matt murmured while draping an arm around her shoulders and giving her a light shake. “Look if you’re a bit uncomfortable staying at his then why not crash with me and Val for a while? None of us would want to see you go, but if you’re heart is set on it, then I won’t stop you. Although we could drop you off in Florida when we get there on tour, if you’re willing to wait a bit longer. Where do they live?”

“Orlando.”

“Well that’s one of the stops along the way, if you’re up to coming along for a bit. Larry said so himself guests could come along as long as there is room. You wouldn’t mind taking the couch, would you?” He picked himself up from the ground, offering a hand down for her to take. “Just think about it, you don’t need to give an answer now. Although if you came back with me now, that’d be enough to keep me happy.”

At first he didn’t think she was going to give up her place on the sand but she reluctantly accepted his help and allowed him to pull her back onto her feet, a faint impression of her old cheery self arising as he swung her onto his back and proceeded to carry her back to the café. Just before they rejoined the others Jess asked him to hang back, sliding back down the ground.

“Jess? What’s wrong?”

She held herself in her arms, looking back at him with a small smile. “Thanks Matt. You’re so nice to me and I don’t know why.”

“Well what have I got to not be?”

“I did steal your drummer and marry him for one,” Jess chuckled. “Messed up your video shooting schedule for two, made you fly back to Huntington for three, made you lose your burger just now for four…” She shook her head and laughed. “I’m just a load of trouble, aren’t I?”

He pulled her into a hug, squeezing her tight. “Just you wait Jess. A week on the Avenged bus and then you’ll know the real definition of trouble.”