I Don't Like Your Boyfriend

I looked longingly at my ex-best friends from across the cafeteria. It was a rainy day, which wasn’t where I lived.

I got a flashback from when Lora and I were five years old. We were at the park, Luke had his book, he could already read, and Coraline was showing off how high she could go on the swing. Lora and I were in the playhouse with our dolls, and I got her Ken doll and played with it, so it could be with my Barbie. She got mad at me because I got it without permission. She threw sand at me, and I threw it back. We started to fight. Coraline had to break us up.

We didn’t talk for a whole entire day. To me, back then, it seemed like an eternity without my best friend, but now, it’s been two weeks since Lora saw Antonio and I. I couldn’t help but connect Antonio being the Ken doll we fought for many years ago, only now, it wasn’t a kids fight.

Here is how it went down.

I remember the pain in her eyes, but it was masked with pure anger. Her blue eyes shined in the night because her eyes were glistening with the tears that threatened to come down. She blinked them away, and I could tell she was trying real hard to stop them.

“Are any of you going to say anything?” she spat at us.

“I--” I started, but she cut me off.

“You told me nothing was going on, Eddy! I asked if the rumors were true, but you said ‘No, there is nothing, I swear’,” her voice was breaking, her gaze fell on Antonio. “And you said from the beginning that you didn’t have feelings for her. I asked you, and you said no!”

“I wasn’t sure about my feelings back then, Lora, but… I never wanted you to know like this.”

“And how exactly did you plan on telling me?” she laughed without humor in it.

He shrugged. “I’m not sure, talk calmly or something.”

She dragged her gaze back to me.

“I didn’t expect this from you, Eddy,” the tears finally won and I could see them fall down her face.

“Lora, I--”

“Don’t speak to me… ever!”

I thought she was going to hit me, but she seemed to rethink her action, and she just turned away and ran.

“I think I just lost my best friend,” my own voice cracked too.

“Eddy, I--”

“No,” I stopped him, I was suddenly feeling very numb. “Not right now, Antonio. I just… I need… space. A lot of space.”

I turned my back to him and walked back home. Tears fell down my face and the only sound was of my heels clicking on the cement sidewalk. I saw my house, and I was glad to see that all of the lights were out.

I took out my keys and opened the front door. I headed up to my room. I took off my shoes and dress, and I got into some pajamas. I took out the bobby pins from my hair, and I brushed it down. I was still crying.

All of those years of friendship and I lost it because of a boy.

It was times like these I wished I had my family. I imagined coming back home and have Coraline be worried about how things went. I would pour my heart and soul to her. She and I would never have secrets. Then in the morning, somehow, my mom would know something was wrong with me, and she would make my favorite breakfast.

“Hey,” a voice broke me from my bittersweet thoughts. It was Roza. I was sitting alone in the cafeteria.

Sterling didn’t come to school for the past two weeks. I told Antonio needed space, and he gave it to me.

So for the past two weeks, I’ve been eating by myself, I was surprised to see Roza.

“Hey,” I responded to her.

She sat down next to me and looked to where I had been. “Why are you guys mad at each other? You guys NEVER fight.”

I didn’t want to look over to them anymore.

“It’s a long story,” I muttered.

“We have thirty minutes to kill,” she smiled at me.

“It’s going to sound like I’m a slut,” I said.

“You’ll never be one, okay? It looks like you need someone to talk to,” she placed a hand on my shoulder.

I nodded and cleared my throat. “Um, Luke is mad at me because I kissed Antonio while I was still with Sterling and he was with Lora. Lora is mad at me because two weeks ago she saw Antonio and I kissing even though I told her there was nothing going on, when in reality… something has been going on ever since he came here.”

“Well duh,” she laughed.

I gave a surprised look. “You know?”

“Eddy, I know when a boy likes a girl, and the way Antonio looked at you was never the way he ever looked at Lora. Luke has had that look ever since I can remember. Sterling too. You have three boys, Eddy, lucky butt.”

“Not when one lies to you, the other is mad at you, and the other is making you doubt everything you know,” I muttered.

“Who is making you doubt?” she asked.

“Antonio,” I sighed. “He… when we’re together it is so perfect, but if it means losing my best friends, I don’t know if it’s worth it or not.”

“Hmm, yes that is a tough decision. Antonio is a good guy,” she said as she looked over to where he was. He was with a couple of friends.

“He is. His family always welcomes me with open arms,” I giggled at the thought of Joseph. “His little brother is always flirting with me, it’s so cute.”

“Here is my thoughts, Eddy, if Lora and Luke are your true friends, then they will suck it up and move on. Antonio makes you happy, I haven’t seen that smile in a long time.”

“What about Sterling?”

“Do you still love him?”

“I’m… not sure.”

“I think you should know because it might be the thing that’s stopping you from being happy again.”

She changed the subject after that. It was a rather eye-opening lunch. It was true, if I decided to be with Antonio, Luke and Lora should support me. But they also had every right to be mad at me.

I was going to corner them, individually, not together. The first one would be Luke. I would do it during dance class. Oh dance class, yeah, he requested we get separate partners. The teacher asked why, and he said because he thought it’d be best to dance with other people to get more experience.

I got stuck with someone that thought he knew absolutely everything! It was very annoying and I wanted to yank my hair out.

When dance class came, I was stretching. Luke got partnered with some girl that barely knew how to twirl perfectly. Antonio was still with Lora, but she was giving him the cold shoulder.

I walked up to Luke, and he turned his back to me. I took his arm and turned him back around. I gave him my most pissed off look.

“I get you’re mad and that you’re hurt, but I’m hurt too, okay? You are one of my very best friends. Why do you do this to me? If you care, why are you doing this? Please, Luke, I don’t want to be mad. I want to talk like we used to. I want back what we had.”

I was glad no one stopped and enjoyed the show. It was just him and I.

He didn’t say anything to me. He just gave me a stern look. He moved away again, and I didn’t stop him, but I was glad I got it out of my system.

I went back to my control-freak partner feeling a lot better. I glanced over to Antonio and Lora, they looked deep in conversation, well he was talking, and she was listening whilst looking pissed. But, she was bouncing her foot up and down, which meant she was trying really hard not to do something.

Hit him?

Kiss him?

I had no idea.

In Psychology class, Cruella was more happy than ever before. She would pass around papers with a grin on her face. I hated that my misery was her happiness.

At least she didn’t get Sterling back.

The pop quiz was really hard to focus on. All of my thoughts went to my problems. Losing best friends, boyfriends, and having feelings for someone that could ruin my life.

After class, I wasn’t feeling any much better anymore. I was walking to my locker when someone pulled me into a storage closet. I half expected Antonio, but it was Luke.

His brown eyes looked into my green ones. He licked his lips nervously.

“I can’t pretend anymore, okay?” he told me. “I can’t just go on like I don’t love you. I love you with all I have, Edalene. Ever since we were little, I have loved you.”

He kissed me.

It wasn’t that sweet innocent kiss we had before, it was full of passion. It was full of love. The love he claimed to have towards me, and I could feel it. I could feel his love for me through the kiss. He backed me up to the wall.

I never thought Luke could be so passionate. He also knew how to kiss so well. When he cupped my ass, I gasped and he snaked his tongue in my mouth. It was very weird, but very, very good.