Here's to You
One shot
If you do read this, please comment. It takes about 10 or 15 seconds of your life, this oneshot took me about two hours, maybe more, and I would like to know what you think of it. It would make me smile :)
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Here she comes to ruin my day again
Right away she's start with shouting
Making this the best week ever
If only she could scream forever.
“Emily!” She screamed at me and I winced from my seat on the sofa.
My girlfriend was home, and I say ‘girlfriend’ in the nicest, most loveable way. I did; I really did. Through all of her hardship, I loved her – of course I did. You couldn’t just stop loving someone after three years, could you?
She stumbled into the room I was in, the living room, and it was obvious that she was drunk out of her mind – as she always was. I got up off of the couch, something I had learned to do when she came into the room and walked over to her to give her a kiss on the lips. She tasted like vodka and other kinds of alcoholic drinks that I couldn’t put my finger on at that second. I had never been a heavy drinker and there are thousands of drinks out there that I had never touched in my life, I had usually stuck to vodka. It worked for me.
Here she comes to pick at my faults again
Right away she's punching, kicking
Making this the best week ever
Better off dead than together
Isn’t it funny how your girlfriend can be the one that ruins you, the one that completely destroys you? The one that you love and the one that says it back. It’s just really, really funny. Well, I think it is anyway – but I don’t know what that counts for.
She started throwing obscenities at me, cursing and cussing me out. She was picking on everything I had done wrong today; how I had not cleaned the living room, how I had not put away the dirty plates or done the washing up. Silly things like that really and I knew she was only saying them to give me guidance in my life. After all, she loved me – right?
But then, of course, she started picking on my personal faults. How I was getting a bit chubbier, how I was forming bags under my eyes, how I had a few more wrinkles than last week. Things that shouldn’t get to me, but they secretly really do. I had managed to hold myself well in front of her, I had taught myself not to break down in front of her.
She always had to go and ruin a perfect day, a perfect week. Every Saturday it was like this, well every weekend it was. Through the week she would work, and so would I. She would be loving towards me in the evenings and in the mornings. She would be the one to kiss me and I would kiss her back, knowing that it wasn’t compulsive. I didn’t have to kiss her during the week, I just liked to.
Sometimes I’ve wondered if maybe I would be better off dead, maybe we’d both be better off dead – she wouldn’t need alcohol and I wouldn’t be verbally abused every weekend after she got back from the bar. But then I would realize that that’s just stupid! It would only fix our problems, what would my parents say? What would her parents say?
Stab your dagger right through my heart and twist
Does this turn you on?
Follow it up by punching my face with your fists
Does this turn you on?
Now on the ground, cut open both of my wrists
Does this turn you on?
Say you love me and suffocate me with a kiss
Whatever turns you on!
She was forcing me down on her, holding my head down with her hands as she forced me to give her oral. This was yet another weekend occurrence; she would come home horny as fuck and force me to eat her out. It wasn’t so much that I minded, she was my girlfriend after all, I liked being able to share intimate moments with her. It was just the fact that this wasn’t intimate, she was forcing me to do it and I knew that I wouldn’t get anything in return. Not even an ‘I love you’, not even a kiss.
I’m not sure if it was whether that this turns her on even more, maybe the fact that she was able to be completely in control of the moment, have complete dominance over the scene that made her thrive it even more. Maybe that was what got her even more turned on. Dominance.
Fancy that, I’ve known this girl four years of my life, and three of them have been spent dating her and I don’t even know for sure if it was dominance that got her completely turned on. Maybe I really was a bad girlfriend, as she so kindly told me.
Here's to me calling off this war
Here's to me walking out that door
Here's to the only casualty
Here's to the mess that you made of me
I wish I could say no, I wish I could just walk out of the room, and out of this horrible mess. I wish I could stand up for myself, I wish I could tell her just how pathetic she made me feel, how horrible she made me think I was.
I wish a lot, but wishes never come true – well, never for me any way. I’ve wished on plenty of shooting stars in my life, wished on plenty of fairies, wished on plenty of birthday candles; but they never worked. Not one of them came true.
Here she comes to ruin my perfect game
Doctor says she's borderline insane
I don't know what I like better
Being comatose or just being with her
Here she comes to point her fingers down at me
With all ten of her personalities
I don't know what I like better
Saying goodbye or saying that I hate her.
She came into my mouth, forcing me to lap it all up and she got up off of the bed and walked out of the room; pulling her pants up from around her ankle as she did so. Her shirt hadn’t even come off of her and her skirt had just risen higher up her waist.
She must have some sort of drinking problem, she would be fine in the morning and then just go out and get drunk in the afternoon – leaving me at home watching TV, waiting for her to come home and insult me.
I’m not sure which one I would prefer, or which one I did prefer – when I was in the coma or when I am able to be with her. You see, a few months ago she really did go crazy. She went way past verbal abuse and started with physical. Of course, I had tried to stop her, blocking her punches with my arms or trying to push her off of me but eventually she was the stronger out of the two of us – her punches had weakened me and I wasn’t feeling one hundred percent that night anyway. She managed to shove me down the stairs after I had walked out of the room, after just having gone down on her and I had landed at the bottom of the stairs in a crumpled heap – my head bleeding and being knocked out.
I think it must have been seeing the mess that she caused that sobered her up pretty quickly, of course I was out at the time but she had told me she dialed 999 as fast as you could say ‘go’ when she saw what she had done and I believed her. I loved her; you believe the people you love, you don’t question it.
You always get to me
Always get to you
Always do your worst to get the best of me
It was now Sunday, and yet again my girlfriend was out getting drunk; most likely. I was sitting on the couch and watching the clock tick, waiting for her to come home. I didn’t feel like putting up with her shit today. I really and truly didn’t. I usually wouldn’t bother with it; I knew that she’d be all lovey dovey with me on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. That was five of the seven days which was more than half – so I was happy. It was only two that she was horrible to me.
But today, I just wasn’t in the mood. I had had myself a drink, as well. Something from her liquor cupboard, something she had told me not to touch. I didn’t even read the label – I just drank, not caring what the consequences were.
I glanced up from the sofa as she came into the living room, she was the kind of drunk that was able to compose themselves – she could walk in a perfectly straight line and act almost sober, but I knew she wasn’t. I could tell deep in her eyes just how much she had been drinking; and it was a lot.
“Well?” she growled and I knew what she was talking about. She expected me to get off of my backside and go over to her and give her a kiss. It was what she wanted.
“No,” I was finally standing up for myself and I knew that so much could go wrong.
“What did you say you fucking slut?” I had no idea why she called me a slut, I didn’t sleep around and I didn’t force my girlfriend on me. That was all of her doing; if anyone, she was the slut around here.
She didn’t tell me exactly, but I could tell that she probably had sex in her drunken state – of course it meant nothing to her, it was just a meaningless fuck, but she would. And then she would come back here and force me on her – she was the slut!
I know I shouldn’t let her, but I did. I let her get to me, I let her get under my skin and I let her pick her way through all of my insides, gnawing her little teeth on my bones – giving me immense pain.
Me always pushing you
Always pushing me
Always manage to being the worst in you!
Once again, she had managed to force me down on her and yet again she was holding my head down with her hands. Only this time, I wasn’t really having any of it. I was doing nothing with my mouth and I was trying to stare up at her, well, more like glare up at her. She stared back at me, an expectant look on her face and all I could do was growl at her and dig my nails as hard as I could into her thighs. It was the best I could do, seeing as the position I was in wasn’t exactly fit for these kinds of situations.
She yelped and her legs jerked, her hands coming off of my head and I was able to get away from her as she looked at the half moon crescents I had managed to make with my nails, I had managed to draw some blood.
“Get back here, you fucking animal,” she growled and sprung off of our bed and pushing herself into me.
I fought back this time, throwing in my own couple of punches and pulling her hair as she did the same back. Both of us growling and spitting at each other in various places until we managed to fall on the floor and I kneed her in the stomach.
She let go of her grip on my hair, clutching onto her stomach and I was able to force my way out from underneath her – giving her one last kick in the stomach before I walked out of the door.
Here's to me calling off this war
Here's to me walking out that door
Here's to the only casualty.
---
Here she comes to ruin my day again
Right away she's start with shouting
Making this the best week ever
If only she could scream forever.
“Emily!” She screamed at me and I winced from my seat on the sofa.
My girlfriend was home, and I say ‘girlfriend’ in the nicest, most loveable way. I did; I really did. Through all of her hardship, I loved her – of course I did. You couldn’t just stop loving someone after three years, could you?
She stumbled into the room I was in, the living room, and it was obvious that she was drunk out of her mind – as she always was. I got up off of the couch, something I had learned to do when she came into the room and walked over to her to give her a kiss on the lips. She tasted like vodka and other kinds of alcoholic drinks that I couldn’t put my finger on at that second. I had never been a heavy drinker and there are thousands of drinks out there that I had never touched in my life, I had usually stuck to vodka. It worked for me.
Here she comes to pick at my faults again
Right away she's punching, kicking
Making this the best week ever
Better off dead than together
Isn’t it funny how your girlfriend can be the one that ruins you, the one that completely destroys you? The one that you love and the one that says it back. It’s just really, really funny. Well, I think it is anyway – but I don’t know what that counts for.
She started throwing obscenities at me, cursing and cussing me out. She was picking on everything I had done wrong today; how I had not cleaned the living room, how I had not put away the dirty plates or done the washing up. Silly things like that really and I knew she was only saying them to give me guidance in my life. After all, she loved me – right?
But then, of course, she started picking on my personal faults. How I was getting a bit chubbier, how I was forming bags under my eyes, how I had a few more wrinkles than last week. Things that shouldn’t get to me, but they secretly really do. I had managed to hold myself well in front of her, I had taught myself not to break down in front of her.
She always had to go and ruin a perfect day, a perfect week. Every Saturday it was like this, well every weekend it was. Through the week she would work, and so would I. She would be loving towards me in the evenings and in the mornings. She would be the one to kiss me and I would kiss her back, knowing that it wasn’t compulsive. I didn’t have to kiss her during the week, I just liked to.
Sometimes I’ve wondered if maybe I would be better off dead, maybe we’d both be better off dead – she wouldn’t need alcohol and I wouldn’t be verbally abused every weekend after she got back from the bar. But then I would realize that that’s just stupid! It would only fix our problems, what would my parents say? What would her parents say?
Stab your dagger right through my heart and twist
Does this turn you on?
Follow it up by punching my face with your fists
Does this turn you on?
Now on the ground, cut open both of my wrists
Does this turn you on?
Say you love me and suffocate me with a kiss
Whatever turns you on!
She was forcing me down on her, holding my head down with her hands as she forced me to give her oral. This was yet another weekend occurrence; she would come home horny as fuck and force me to eat her out. It wasn’t so much that I minded, she was my girlfriend after all, I liked being able to share intimate moments with her. It was just the fact that this wasn’t intimate, she was forcing me to do it and I knew that I wouldn’t get anything in return. Not even an ‘I love you’, not even a kiss.
I’m not sure if it was whether that this turns her on even more, maybe the fact that she was able to be completely in control of the moment, have complete dominance over the scene that made her thrive it even more. Maybe that was what got her even more turned on. Dominance.
Fancy that, I’ve known this girl four years of my life, and three of them have been spent dating her and I don’t even know for sure if it was dominance that got her completely turned on. Maybe I really was a bad girlfriend, as she so kindly told me.
Here's to me calling off this war
Here's to me walking out that door
Here's to the only casualty
Here's to the mess that you made of me
I wish I could say no, I wish I could just walk out of the room, and out of this horrible mess. I wish I could stand up for myself, I wish I could tell her just how pathetic she made me feel, how horrible she made me think I was.
I wish a lot, but wishes never come true – well, never for me any way. I’ve wished on plenty of shooting stars in my life, wished on plenty of fairies, wished on plenty of birthday candles; but they never worked. Not one of them came true.
Here she comes to ruin my perfect game
Doctor says she's borderline insane
I don't know what I like better
Being comatose or just being with her
Here she comes to point her fingers down at me
With all ten of her personalities
I don't know what I like better
Saying goodbye or saying that I hate her.
She came into my mouth, forcing me to lap it all up and she got up off of the bed and walked out of the room; pulling her pants up from around her ankle as she did so. Her shirt hadn’t even come off of her and her skirt had just risen higher up her waist.
She must have some sort of drinking problem, she would be fine in the morning and then just go out and get drunk in the afternoon – leaving me at home watching TV, waiting for her to come home and insult me.
I’m not sure which one I would prefer, or which one I did prefer – when I was in the coma or when I am able to be with her. You see, a few months ago she really did go crazy. She went way past verbal abuse and started with physical. Of course, I had tried to stop her, blocking her punches with my arms or trying to push her off of me but eventually she was the stronger out of the two of us – her punches had weakened me and I wasn’t feeling one hundred percent that night anyway. She managed to shove me down the stairs after I had walked out of the room, after just having gone down on her and I had landed at the bottom of the stairs in a crumpled heap – my head bleeding and being knocked out.
I think it must have been seeing the mess that she caused that sobered her up pretty quickly, of course I was out at the time but she had told me she dialed 999 as fast as you could say ‘go’ when she saw what she had done and I believed her. I loved her; you believe the people you love, you don’t question it.
You always get to me
Always get to you
Always do your worst to get the best of me
It was now Sunday, and yet again my girlfriend was out getting drunk; most likely. I was sitting on the couch and watching the clock tick, waiting for her to come home. I didn’t feel like putting up with her shit today. I really and truly didn’t. I usually wouldn’t bother with it; I knew that she’d be all lovey dovey with me on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. That was five of the seven days which was more than half – so I was happy. It was only two that she was horrible to me.
But today, I just wasn’t in the mood. I had had myself a drink, as well. Something from her liquor cupboard, something she had told me not to touch. I didn’t even read the label – I just drank, not caring what the consequences were.
I glanced up from the sofa as she came into the living room, she was the kind of drunk that was able to compose themselves – she could walk in a perfectly straight line and act almost sober, but I knew she wasn’t. I could tell deep in her eyes just how much she had been drinking; and it was a lot.
“Well?” she growled and I knew what she was talking about. She expected me to get off of my backside and go over to her and give her a kiss. It was what she wanted.
“No,” I was finally standing up for myself and I knew that so much could go wrong.
“What did you say you fucking slut?” I had no idea why she called me a slut, I didn’t sleep around and I didn’t force my girlfriend on me. That was all of her doing; if anyone, she was the slut around here.
She didn’t tell me exactly, but I could tell that she probably had sex in her drunken state – of course it meant nothing to her, it was just a meaningless fuck, but she would. And then she would come back here and force me on her – she was the slut!
I know I shouldn’t let her, but I did. I let her get to me, I let her get under my skin and I let her pick her way through all of my insides, gnawing her little teeth on my bones – giving me immense pain.
Me always pushing you
Always pushing me
Always manage to being the worst in you!
Once again, she had managed to force me down on her and yet again she was holding my head down with her hands. Only this time, I wasn’t really having any of it. I was doing nothing with my mouth and I was trying to stare up at her, well, more like glare up at her. She stared back at me, an expectant look on her face and all I could do was growl at her and dig my nails as hard as I could into her thighs. It was the best I could do, seeing as the position I was in wasn’t exactly fit for these kinds of situations.
She yelped and her legs jerked, her hands coming off of my head and I was able to get away from her as she looked at the half moon crescents I had managed to make with my nails, I had managed to draw some blood.
“Get back here, you fucking animal,” she growled and sprung off of our bed and pushing herself into me.
I fought back this time, throwing in my own couple of punches and pulling her hair as she did the same back. Both of us growling and spitting at each other in various places until we managed to fall on the floor and I kneed her in the stomach.
She let go of her grip on my hair, clutching onto her stomach and I was able to force my way out from underneath her – giving her one last kick in the stomach before I walked out of the door.
Here's to me calling off this war
Here's to me walking out that door
Here's to the only casualty.