Ruby Rooms

"Paul---it's Adrienne. Sorry to have to call you so late but something's come up. I'm coming back to Minnesota---"

"What the fuck? Are you ok?"

"Yeah I'm fine. I'll just explain when I see you."

"No---you'll explain now. You're doing great out there, why the hell are you throwing it all away? I've told you---there's nothing here in Minnesota for you."

"Well then send someone else out here to take over my place! I'll do anything at all, Paul. Anything. Just please---don't keep me here."

Adrienne had raced back to her apartment without even giving the Reverend/Billie Joe a second glance. Once she was safely inside, she wasted no time in dragging her suitcase down from the top of her closet and commenced throwing in whatever she could lay her hands on. It wasn't organised, but she was in a state of such anxiety that she didn't even care.

All she knew was that she wanted out of there. And fast.

"Please Paul," she choked back tears as her boss remained silent on the other end of the line as he weighed up his options.

"You know I wouldn't ask to come back unless it was really, really urgent."

"Well then tell me what's the matter and then I'll be able to make a better decision!"

Her voice broke. "I can't---I just can't."

At that moment, she heard a heavy hammering on her front door. She knew it would be him, but she gazed through the peephole anyway. Sure enough, as she squinted through the tiny circle of glass, he eyes were met with a flash of blonde hair with dirty, brown roots.

"I know you're in there Adie," she heard him shout. "And I'm not going to go away so you might as well open the door so we can sort this out!"

"Who's that shouting?"

Adrienne forgot that Paul was there.

"No-one. Just some drunk neighbour from across the hall."

"Open the fucking door Adrienne."

"Why's he shouting your name?"

"Coz that's what he likes to do after he's been drinking. He always asks to come in for a chat."

"I see---but back on to you. You know I can't let you come home without a valid reason Adrienne. You're the best journalist I have. I'm not letting you go to waste out here. Not when you've been doing so well for yourself---"

"It's uhhh--- uhh, it's---" She couldn't concentrate for the hammering on the door. "It's a family issue. I need to see my family."

She heard Paul sigh. "Stop lying to me Adrienne. I saw your mom and your brother the other day. They looked great. Your mom was telling me how proud she is of you. And your brother told me about the skate trip that he's about to make 'round Europe. So you've got two choices---you can either come clean to me and come home. Or you can carry on lying and stay there."

"I mean it Adie. I'm not leaving."

Between Paul's clipped tone and the racket coming from the hallway, Adrienne lost it completely. In a state of wild sobs, she launched the phone across the room and then tore the door open with a force so fierce that she wouldn't have been surprised if it had flown off the hinges.

The sight of Him made her feel ill. Nausea bubbled up her throat as he locked his green gaze with hers.

"Leave. Me. Alone."

"We need to talk about this." His eyes were wide with desperation.

"No. We don't. You've said what you wanted to say."

"But that's exactly it, no I haven't!"

"Well I don't want to hear any more."

She made to slam the door on him but he caught it with his palm and pushed it back open.

"Ok---fine. Run away again.. Just like you did last time."

"Excuse me?!"

"You heard me."

She squared up to him as best she could and forced herself to look him in the eyes. "Say it again. I dare you."

"I said---run away. Again."

He was expecting her reaction and so caught her wrist just before her hand collided with his cheek.

"Hit me all you want Adrienne. It's not going to change things because you know it's the truth. You ran away back then and look at the mess we're in now because of it. If you leave, nothing will ever get solved."

"Yes it will coz I'll be miles away from you so I won't have to see your face and be reminded of how much I've been lied to!"

"I haven't lied to you."

"Well you haven't exactly been honest with me either! You've had three months---three months to come clean to me. And in all that time, you let us grow closer and closer together with me thinking that you were a completely different person! You've got no idea how much of an idiot you've made me feel."

She turned away from him and continued to haphazardly throw items into her suitcase. He shadowed her around the room as if they were doing an Argentinean Tango; their footsteps intricately zig-zagged between one another's but their bodies never came into contact. The pace made him dizzy, in the end he broke out of their little dance formation and grabbed her elbow to turn her to face him.

"Stop. Adrienne. Please! I'm begging you."

Sobs began to rise in her throat again as she collapsed down to sit on the bed. "I can't do this! This is too much to take in!"

He slowly moved so he was sitting down next to her. "I can only imagine how hard this must be for you. But you've got to understand that it's not easy for me either. Do I feel a bastard for having hid this from you? Sure! Do I regret telling you? Fuck no."

"So why tell me now? In fact, why tell me at all? If I didn't realise who you were, why not just keep the truth hidden?"

"Another month of hiding it from you would have killed me."

He winced as he saw her flinch.

"Sorry---bad choice of words."

He cupped her face with one hand and gently pulled her head towards his; wiping a stray tear off her cheek as he did so.

"I never meant to hurt you. I wanted to tell you the truth because I love how close we've become again. You need to stop thinking that you're an idiot because you're not. I don't blame you for not realising it was me---I know how different I am now."

Adrienne laughed dryly. "Who would have thought that hair dye and sunglasses could make such a difference?"

But she knew it wasn't just the physical changes that had stopped her from recognising him; he was emotionally different too. He was a boy when they met, immature and excited about the possibilities that lay ahead for him. Now he was a man and was more determined, focused and wise.

"Who are you?" she whispered as her eyes searched for answers in his.

"I can be whoever you want me to be, Adie. If you want me to be Billie Joe, then I'll be Billie Joe. If you want me to be the Reverend, then I'll be the Reverend. But the only way you can find out who you want me to be, is if you stay---"

Adrienne closed one hand around his that was still cradling her cheek, and sighed. She knew that whether she ran away from, or embraced, the man in front of her; he was about to tip her life upside down for a second time.