I Must Be Dreaming
Tell Me That You Love Me and It'll Be Alright
It had been about three months since that morning on the back patio. Since John had promised to always be there for me and he has yet to let me down. We were together as much as humanly possible.
"So..." Garrett began as we sat in the living room watching some stupid reality show. "What is going on between you and Johnny Boy? You guys hang out almost every hour of the day, and if you don't, you two are always texting each other. I know he like, adores you, and I know that you have been crushing on him, but I think he feels more for you than you do for him..." He ranted.
I knew he would bring this up sooner or later... I knew how I felt about John, and that's what scared me. I was falling for him. It sounds ridiculously, and incredibly stupid, but I know I'm heading towards the point of no return.
"Garrett, I like him. Okay? I just... I don't know... I'm afraid of commitment. You know this." I'm so sick of always having to tell him this. Even though I already know that I like John a bit more than I should...
"Yes, yes, yes! I do know this!" Garrett exploded as he jumped up off of the couch, catching me by surprise. "But I also do know that John would never hurt you, AJ! He is one of the best guys I know! He is so strung up on you, he can hardly breathe without your presence!"
"You can't force me into love, Gar! Jesus Christ! You know me better than anyone! You know I have trust issues! I can't just turn that off!" I screamed right back at him.
"Stop hiding behind your past, AJ! You are forcing yourself away from love! I'm not forcing you into it!" He got right up in my face, "I just want you to be happy. You deserve all the love you can get... But when you don't let people love you, you are making yourself miserable." He whispered as he put his hands on my cheeks, making sure I looked him in the eyes.
I hated it when we fought. Especially when I knew I was hurting him. He hated it when I wasn't happy.
"I have your love, Gar. And-"
"No. My love is not all you need, got it? I don't mean a friendship type of love, AJ. You know this." He said, cutting me off completely. "Now go get ready. Our concert is in three hours."
I nodded my head and kissed him on the cheek as I left to get ready.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
The concert started at 7:30 and was located at a small club downtown. It was their fifth small concert, and locally, they were getting pretty big.
I stepped out of Garrett's car wearing my "Extinct is forever" long sleeve t-shirt, denim shorts, and some jewelry. I had straightened my hair, and kept my makeup simple. Simple was always my favorite, and John likes it when I wear very little makeup...
"Andy, baby!" Speak of the devil. He was wearing his big ol' sunglasses, a white v-neck, black skinny jeans, and white vans.
"Johnny Bravo!" I yelled back as I hugged him. We were backstage, the boys still had about thirty minutes before they started. We talked about how our day went and they started warming up. Before I knew it, they were on stage, everyone playing their hearts out, and John, singing his out.
"Alright guys, thanks for coming to our show! This will be our last song for the night, it's new, and kicks ass! It's called Give Me Anything! Enjoy!" The club was packed, so the screaming was pretty damn loud from all the fans.
The boys they have their eyes all over you,
And you're loving every second of attention.
I need to find just some way to get through,
Or at least some way that I can mention.
I'm feeling you,
You're feeling me,
What exactly is holding us back?
I'm feeling you,
Are you feeling me?
Just Give me something,
give me, give me, give me anything.
Oh it's you,
And it's true,
You're electric I can't get over it.
[x2]
You're running through my veins you feel like a freight train,
I'm trying everything to keep my hands off of you.
So give me something,
Please just give me anything,
Cause I want you more than they do.
And oh no,
I think I lost myself in your deep blue eyes,
And oh no,
I think it's time we cut to the chase tonight.
Oh it's you,
And it's true,
You're electric, I can't get over it
[x2]
I'm feeling you, (You're electric)
You're feeling me, (and I can't get over it)
What exactly is holding us back?
I'm feeling you, (You're electric)
You're feeling me, (and I can't get over it)
Just give me anything.
John was watching me the entire time he sang.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
John's P.O.V.
Andy knew. I mean, she had to know that entire song was about her, there was no denying it. I had to tell her; Tell her everything that has been going through my mind. I'm pretty sure if I didn't, I would explode.
I asked her to go on a walk with me once we had packed up all the equipment. There was a park not far from the venue, and I knew she wouldn't mind going on one. She loves getting fresh air.
The walk was quite for the first few minutes, not awkward, comfortable. I let out a sigh, knowing I'd have to tell her sooner or later. Well, here goes nothing...
"Andy, you scare me." Whoa, that sure didn't come out right. She looked at me strangely as she let out a small laugh.
"What?" She asked as she stopped walking.
I can't believe I just said that. I sound like such an idiot. I turned so that I was facing her and took a deep breath.
"That so did not come out right... Uh, you scare me in a good way. Like, whenever you are in the room, my heart starts beating so rapidly, I'm afraid I will suffer from a heart attack. When I'm away from you, I feel as if I can't breathe, but when I am with you, I forget how to breathe."
"John.." She began, but I held up my hand, telling her I was not finished.
" Ever since I met you, I can't seem to stop singing, or smiling. I can hardly ever complete my sentences, and stutter like a fool." She was blushing, while looking into my eyes with a confused expression. "What I'm trying to say Andy, is that I've never felt this way about anyone. Ever. I-I'm in l-love with y-you." There, I finally told her how I felt. I could feel the weight on my shoulders lift.
She was silent for a few minutes, letting it all sink in, I guess. "I... John... I don't know what you want me to say..." Her eyes were filling with tears. Wait, what did she just say?
"W-what? I-I just poured my heart out to you, and you have nothing to say back?" I asked, getting a little angry.
"John... I just don't know what you expect me to say... You can't just dump all of this on me... You know this kind of stuff makes me uneasy." She said, taking a couple steps backwards, only to have me close the space between us.
"I was expecting you to say the same thing, Andy. Not even going to lie. I mean, seriously? All the signs are there! You return my feelings! Just tell me!" I exclaimed. I probably shouldn't have gotten so angry, but I couldn't help it. I was sick of not knowing for sure.
"Then what do you want me to say if you already know?!" She shouted back as she got into my face, even though she had to stand on her tippy toes, even then she wasn't tall enough.
"I want you to tell me that you fucking love me back! I want you and only you, Andy! For crying out loud you know I will never hurt you! We will be okay! We will be happy!" I could feel the tears coming to my eyes. Andy already had tears pouring down her face.
"Well I do! I fucking love you, Jo-" I didn't even give her time to finish. I smashed my lips against hers before she could even finish saying my name.
"So..." Garrett began as we sat in the living room watching some stupid reality show. "What is going on between you and Johnny Boy? You guys hang out almost every hour of the day, and if you don't, you two are always texting each other. I know he like, adores you, and I know that you have been crushing on him, but I think he feels more for you than you do for him..." He ranted.
I knew he would bring this up sooner or later... I knew how I felt about John, and that's what scared me. I was falling for him. It sounds ridiculously, and incredibly stupid, but I know I'm heading towards the point of no return.
"Garrett, I like him. Okay? I just... I don't know... I'm afraid of commitment. You know this." I'm so sick of always having to tell him this. Even though I already know that I like John a bit more than I should...
"Yes, yes, yes! I do know this!" Garrett exploded as he jumped up off of the couch, catching me by surprise. "But I also do know that John would never hurt you, AJ! He is one of the best guys I know! He is so strung up on you, he can hardly breathe without your presence!"
"You can't force me into love, Gar! Jesus Christ! You know me better than anyone! You know I have trust issues! I can't just turn that off!" I screamed right back at him.
"Stop hiding behind your past, AJ! You are forcing yourself away from love! I'm not forcing you into it!" He got right up in my face, "I just want you to be happy. You deserve all the love you can get... But when you don't let people love you, you are making yourself miserable." He whispered as he put his hands on my cheeks, making sure I looked him in the eyes.
I hated it when we fought. Especially when I knew I was hurting him. He hated it when I wasn't happy.
"I have your love, Gar. And-"
"No. My love is not all you need, got it? I don't mean a friendship type of love, AJ. You know this." He said, cutting me off completely. "Now go get ready. Our concert is in three hours."
I nodded my head and kissed him on the cheek as I left to get ready.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
The concert started at 7:30 and was located at a small club downtown. It was their fifth small concert, and locally, they were getting pretty big.
I stepped out of Garrett's car wearing my "Extinct is forever" long sleeve t-shirt, denim shorts, and some jewelry. I had straightened my hair, and kept my makeup simple. Simple was always my favorite, and John likes it when I wear very little makeup...
"Andy, baby!" Speak of the devil. He was wearing his big ol' sunglasses, a white v-neck, black skinny jeans, and white vans.
"Johnny Bravo!" I yelled back as I hugged him. We were backstage, the boys still had about thirty minutes before they started. We talked about how our day went and they started warming up. Before I knew it, they were on stage, everyone playing their hearts out, and John, singing his out.
"Alright guys, thanks for coming to our show! This will be our last song for the night, it's new, and kicks ass! It's called Give Me Anything! Enjoy!" The club was packed, so the screaming was pretty damn loud from all the fans.
The boys they have their eyes all over you,
And you're loving every second of attention.
I need to find just some way to get through,
Or at least some way that I can mention.
I'm feeling you,
You're feeling me,
What exactly is holding us back?
I'm feeling you,
Are you feeling me?
Just Give me something,
give me, give me, give me anything.
Oh it's you,
And it's true,
You're electric I can't get over it.
[x2]
You're running through my veins you feel like a freight train,
I'm trying everything to keep my hands off of you.
So give me something,
Please just give me anything,
Cause I want you more than they do.
And oh no,
I think I lost myself in your deep blue eyes,
And oh no,
I think it's time we cut to the chase tonight.
Oh it's you,
And it's true,
You're electric, I can't get over it
[x2]
I'm feeling you, (You're electric)
You're feeling me, (and I can't get over it)
What exactly is holding us back?
I'm feeling you, (You're electric)
You're feeling me, (and I can't get over it)
Just give me anything.
John was watching me the entire time he sang.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
John's P.O.V.
Andy knew. I mean, she had to know that entire song was about her, there was no denying it. I had to tell her; Tell her everything that has been going through my mind. I'm pretty sure if I didn't, I would explode.
I asked her to go on a walk with me once we had packed up all the equipment. There was a park not far from the venue, and I knew she wouldn't mind going on one. She loves getting fresh air.
The walk was quite for the first few minutes, not awkward, comfortable. I let out a sigh, knowing I'd have to tell her sooner or later. Well, here goes nothing...
"Andy, you scare me." Whoa, that sure didn't come out right. She looked at me strangely as she let out a small laugh.
"What?" She asked as she stopped walking.
I can't believe I just said that. I sound like such an idiot. I turned so that I was facing her and took a deep breath.
"That so did not come out right... Uh, you scare me in a good way. Like, whenever you are in the room, my heart starts beating so rapidly, I'm afraid I will suffer from a heart attack. When I'm away from you, I feel as if I can't breathe, but when I am with you, I forget how to breathe."
"John.." She began, but I held up my hand, telling her I was not finished.
" Ever since I met you, I can't seem to stop singing, or smiling. I can hardly ever complete my sentences, and stutter like a fool." She was blushing, while looking into my eyes with a confused expression. "What I'm trying to say Andy, is that I've never felt this way about anyone. Ever. I-I'm in l-love with y-you." There, I finally told her how I felt. I could feel the weight on my shoulders lift.
She was silent for a few minutes, letting it all sink in, I guess. "I... John... I don't know what you want me to say..." Her eyes were filling with tears. Wait, what did she just say?
"W-what? I-I just poured my heart out to you, and you have nothing to say back?" I asked, getting a little angry.
"John... I just don't know what you expect me to say... You can't just dump all of this on me... You know this kind of stuff makes me uneasy." She said, taking a couple steps backwards, only to have me close the space between us.
"I was expecting you to say the same thing, Andy. Not even going to lie. I mean, seriously? All the signs are there! You return my feelings! Just tell me!" I exclaimed. I probably shouldn't have gotten so angry, but I couldn't help it. I was sick of not knowing for sure.
"Then what do you want me to say if you already know?!" She shouted back as she got into my face, even though she had to stand on her tippy toes, even then she wasn't tall enough.
"I want you to tell me that you fucking love me back! I want you and only you, Andy! For crying out loud you know I will never hurt you! We will be okay! We will be happy!" I could feel the tears coming to my eyes. Andy already had tears pouring down her face.
"Well I do! I fucking love you, Jo-" I didn't even give her time to finish. I smashed my lips against hers before she could even finish saying my name.