Dear Diary

1-26-10

Why must she over analyze? All she can do is think "What if?" What if he tries something? What if she does something wrong? What if she gives him the wrong impression?

She's trying to move on, it's making her sick. She's got to stop this madness! She's only hurting herself.

She wants to stop. She wants to be happy. But her mind keeps telling her that she won't be a happy with anyone but him.

She promised she wouldn't wait for him. Promised him, herself, and to whatever higher powers out there. She can't stop her heart though. It's becoming rogue. It won't listen to her brain anymore.

And yet, all she can think about is that one kiss. How her mind literally went blank as their lips touch each other. Shivers down her spine as their tongues massaged each other. His hands giving her goose bumps.

She's completely herself whenever he's around. She doesn't have to think about the "what if"s, about how she sees herself.

But, he can't date her. He doesn't want to risk losing what we have. Our friendship. Our bond.
Me.

But there's the question that's been bothering me. So was he lying?