Status: Discontinued
You Only Get One Shot Do Not Miss Your Chance to Blow
Eight
“This is a long story Brendon.”
“I have plenty of time Emily,” he imitated my tone. “Besides, I am fricken confused!”
“Okay well, I don’t really know where to begin… Okay, well my parents were young when they fell in love, and they were young to marry also. My mom was 18 and my dad was 22. They both agreed that they wanted kids, but were going to wait until they were older. My mom had a brother, his name was Mike and he was married to Alice. So in other words they are my aunt and uncle.”
I paused to make sure Brendon wasn’t already confused. He nodded for me to continue.
“Anyways, so they were relatives, but they didn’t really act like it, they were more like best friends. They did everything together. Mike and my dad would have football parties and my mom and Alice would throw dinner parties and redecorates bathrooms together. My dad and Alice worked together as real estate agents, so everyone was around each other all the time and they spent all their free time together. Finally when my mom turned 24 and my dad was 28, they decided to have me, and just two years prior, Mike and Alice had their third son.”
“Since we were less than two years apart, when my parents went out with Mike and Alice, my newest cousin and I were lumped together. We had to spend all our time together, we played together, we went to daycare together, hell sometimes we had to have sleepovers because our parents would go out. But no one could ever ignore the tension between us. Even when I was one we would get into fights and throw toy trucks at each other or he would deliberately try to make me fall when I was learning how to walk.”
I paused and swallowed hard, as I inhaled my breath became shaky.
I continued, “When I was about two, and my cousin was around 4, my parents stopped hanging out with my uncle and aunt. I remember there was yelling all the time and my parents were always fighting, so were Mike and Alice. I didn’t know what was happening, I was only two, but as I grew up, the fighting never stopped. It only got worse. My dad started drinking and he would come home from bars at three or four in the morning. Sometimes he didn’t come home at all and he would show up a couple days later, his clothes full of filth and his whole body would reek of sweat and beer. My mom was a mess too, but she didn’t do anything about my dad’s behavior, she would let it happen and deal with it.
“I grew up like this, and the sad thing was, I thought it was normal, I thought your dad was supposed to hit you. If I didn’t get 25 out of 25 on my spelling test, I expected my dad to throw and plate at my head, and if I forgot to make my bed, I thought it was okay for my dad not to feed me. I also thought it was normal for him to hit my mother. Sometimes I would be lying in bed and I would hear yelling and screaming downstairs, and I knew he was probably throwing her up against the counter.”
I let tears escape my eyes and fall down my cheek. Brendon was still sitting there very still and wide eyed at me, his mouth hung open with disgust.
“I was just a kid, so I didn’t know it was bad. I grew up with that lifestyle and I didn’t know any other way so it seems perfectly normal for me. I finally figured out my family was not normal. It was the second week of fifth grade, and my teacher let us bring home our first project we did. It was a color wheel we painted in art class. I had gotten an A and I was so excited to show my dad and get his approval and maybe a tootsie roll for my good efforts. I walked home from school with my best friend Kevin, like every other day. The sun was beating down on us and as we approached his house, right across from mine, his mom poked her head out the door and told me I could come over and play for a little bit. When we got inside, Kevin showed his mom his color wheel and she gawked at it and smiled down at him saying it was one of the most beautiful things he had ever made. Then she looked at mine and had the same reaction. She said she was so proud and that we were good artists.
“That’s when I got confused, Kevin had gotten a B on his and I had gotten an A+. Why would his mom be so happy for him? Shouldn’t she be sending him to his room right now? When I got home from his house that day and ran over to show my dad. He took one look at it and threw it to the ground. I looked up at him with pleading eyes and said, ‘Don’t you like it daddy?’ And I remember his voice boomed across the house, ‘NO! YOU WENT OUTSIDE THE LINES! YOU ARE WORTHLESS AND YOUR AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH!’”
I finally let out a whimper and started crying. Brendon took me into his arms and hugged me, he kept shushing me and telling me it was okay. I finally gained more mental strength and sat up a little and kept continues with the story.
“That was they day. That was the day I knew something was wrong, Kevin’s mom had always been so nice to me, like a real mother should, she made me supper when my mom wouldn’t get out of bed and she helped my with my homework when my mom was too depressed to function. So she pretty much became my mom and Kev’s dad pretty much became my dad.
“My cousin went to my school and I saw him all the time in elementary and middle school and we still hated each other the same, just in different ways. For instance, we were put in the same music class coincidentally. The whole music class I was dedicated to beat him out and vise versa. The thing was, we didn’t know why we disliked the other so much, we just did.
“When I was thirteen, everything fell into place. My mom finally built up enough guts to divorce my dad, she also got a restraining order for fear of him coming back to hurt us. My mom finally told me what happened.
“Two years before I was born, my dad had an affair, but my mom didn’t know about it, and it resulted in something very bad. The women my dad had an affair with just so happened to be my aunt Alice. Brendon, my dad was the father of her baby and no one knew except them two. Mike was so happy because we would be having his third son. Alice and my dad kept it a secret for a while. They kept it a secret until I was born. They dept is a secret after I was born. And my dad assumed that they would always keep it a secret. But finally Alice broke, she said she couldn’t handle the stress and guilt from keeping it hidden.
“She gathered Mike, my mom and my dad and spilled the whole story about how she had an affair with my dad that resulted in her and Mike’s child.”
I looked at Brendon, “Bren, I’m sure you already know the punch line, cause I’m pretty sure you know who Mike and Alice are.”
“Yeah b-but, I need you to say it.”
I deeply inhaled my shaky breath and said, “My cousin, their child, the kid I could never get a long with, was Jon. Jon is my cousin slash brother.”
*Silence*
*More silence*
“I have plenty of time Emily,” he imitated my tone. “Besides, I am fricken confused!”
“Okay well, I don’t really know where to begin… Okay, well my parents were young when they fell in love, and they were young to marry also. My mom was 18 and my dad was 22. They both agreed that they wanted kids, but were going to wait until they were older. My mom had a brother, his name was Mike and he was married to Alice. So in other words they are my aunt and uncle.”
I paused to make sure Brendon wasn’t already confused. He nodded for me to continue.
“Anyways, so they were relatives, but they didn’t really act like it, they were more like best friends. They did everything together. Mike and my dad would have football parties and my mom and Alice would throw dinner parties and redecorates bathrooms together. My dad and Alice worked together as real estate agents, so everyone was around each other all the time and they spent all their free time together. Finally when my mom turned 24 and my dad was 28, they decided to have me, and just two years prior, Mike and Alice had their third son.”
“Since we were less than two years apart, when my parents went out with Mike and Alice, my newest cousin and I were lumped together. We had to spend all our time together, we played together, we went to daycare together, hell sometimes we had to have sleepovers because our parents would go out. But no one could ever ignore the tension between us. Even when I was one we would get into fights and throw toy trucks at each other or he would deliberately try to make me fall when I was learning how to walk.”
I paused and swallowed hard, as I inhaled my breath became shaky.
I continued, “When I was about two, and my cousin was around 4, my parents stopped hanging out with my uncle and aunt. I remember there was yelling all the time and my parents were always fighting, so were Mike and Alice. I didn’t know what was happening, I was only two, but as I grew up, the fighting never stopped. It only got worse. My dad started drinking and he would come home from bars at three or four in the morning. Sometimes he didn’t come home at all and he would show up a couple days later, his clothes full of filth and his whole body would reek of sweat and beer. My mom was a mess too, but she didn’t do anything about my dad’s behavior, she would let it happen and deal with it.
“I grew up like this, and the sad thing was, I thought it was normal, I thought your dad was supposed to hit you. If I didn’t get 25 out of 25 on my spelling test, I expected my dad to throw and plate at my head, and if I forgot to make my bed, I thought it was okay for my dad not to feed me. I also thought it was normal for him to hit my mother. Sometimes I would be lying in bed and I would hear yelling and screaming downstairs, and I knew he was probably throwing her up against the counter.”
I let tears escape my eyes and fall down my cheek. Brendon was still sitting there very still and wide eyed at me, his mouth hung open with disgust.
“I was just a kid, so I didn’t know it was bad. I grew up with that lifestyle and I didn’t know any other way so it seems perfectly normal for me. I finally figured out my family was not normal. It was the second week of fifth grade, and my teacher let us bring home our first project we did. It was a color wheel we painted in art class. I had gotten an A and I was so excited to show my dad and get his approval and maybe a tootsie roll for my good efforts. I walked home from school with my best friend Kevin, like every other day. The sun was beating down on us and as we approached his house, right across from mine, his mom poked her head out the door and told me I could come over and play for a little bit. When we got inside, Kevin showed his mom his color wheel and she gawked at it and smiled down at him saying it was one of the most beautiful things he had ever made. Then she looked at mine and had the same reaction. She said she was so proud and that we were good artists.
“That’s when I got confused, Kevin had gotten a B on his and I had gotten an A+. Why would his mom be so happy for him? Shouldn’t she be sending him to his room right now? When I got home from his house that day and ran over to show my dad. He took one look at it and threw it to the ground. I looked up at him with pleading eyes and said, ‘Don’t you like it daddy?’ And I remember his voice boomed across the house, ‘NO! YOU WENT OUTSIDE THE LINES! YOU ARE WORTHLESS AND YOUR AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH!’”
I finally let out a whimper and started crying. Brendon took me into his arms and hugged me, he kept shushing me and telling me it was okay. I finally gained more mental strength and sat up a little and kept continues with the story.
“That was they day. That was the day I knew something was wrong, Kevin’s mom had always been so nice to me, like a real mother should, she made me supper when my mom wouldn’t get out of bed and she helped my with my homework when my mom was too depressed to function. So she pretty much became my mom and Kev’s dad pretty much became my dad.
“My cousin went to my school and I saw him all the time in elementary and middle school and we still hated each other the same, just in different ways. For instance, we were put in the same music class coincidentally. The whole music class I was dedicated to beat him out and vise versa. The thing was, we didn’t know why we disliked the other so much, we just did.
“When I was thirteen, everything fell into place. My mom finally built up enough guts to divorce my dad, she also got a restraining order for fear of him coming back to hurt us. My mom finally told me what happened.
“Two years before I was born, my dad had an affair, but my mom didn’t know about it, and it resulted in something very bad. The women my dad had an affair with just so happened to be my aunt Alice. Brendon, my dad was the father of her baby and no one knew except them two. Mike was so happy because we would be having his third son. Alice and my dad kept it a secret for a while. They kept it a secret until I was born. They dept is a secret after I was born. And my dad assumed that they would always keep it a secret. But finally Alice broke, she said she couldn’t handle the stress and guilt from keeping it hidden.
“She gathered Mike, my mom and my dad and spilled the whole story about how she had an affair with my dad that resulted in her and Mike’s child.”
I looked at Brendon, “Bren, I’m sure you already know the punch line, cause I’m pretty sure you know who Mike and Alice are.”
“Yeah b-but, I need you to say it.”
I deeply inhaled my shaky breath and said, “My cousin, their child, the kid I could never get a long with, was Jon. Jon is my cousin slash brother.”
*Silence*
*More silence*