Lust or More

Always Be There

It's been a month since I found out about the half blood being Robert's boyfriend. A month since the fight, were nasty horrible words were said. I miss Robert so much, but what he said really hurt me. I couldn't believe he actually went there. Sure, I was attacking his boyfriend, but he hit below the belt. At the moment I was looking at myself in the mirror, double checking that my bandage were on good. The clock shows that there was still half an hour before breakfast.
“I shouldn't have waked up so early." I sat next to Sophia’s cage. I found myself talking to her a lot more lately. She nods her head, I smile at her.
"It hurts Sophia," I confess to her. She turns her head sideways as if asking what hurts. "It hurts seeing Robert with that thing happy. It's like he isn't even affected by us not being friends anymore. It just sucks." I said, not being able to find the words to explain the pain I was feeling. "Sorry, if I can't explain myself well. I'm a Slytherin what can I say." I explain. She nods her head in understanding. "Thanks for listening. I really need someone to listen to me. Draco and Blaise are boys, so talking to them wouldn't be an option." I appreciated her company. She squeaks at the door. "What's wrong?" I look around to see Draco standing by the door.
"You could talk to me." He leans against the door frame.
"How long were you standing there?" I stood up, feeling vulnerable and violated.
"Not long, I only heard that talking to me was not an option. I just want to let you know it is." He told me, but I was too in my emotions to care. He need to learn boundaries, he can’t just come up here and spy on me. How long would he have stood there, if Sophia didn’t let me know he was there?
I look at the clock. "Come on, let's go to breakfast." I pick up my bag.
"Did you hear what I said?" He was upset that I didn’t jump in his arm and declare him my knight in shining amore. A part of me couldn’t blame him, because I normally would have. We are both still learning what it means to be friends to the other.
"Yes, Draco I heard you and I'll think about it." I tried to walk out the door, but he moves his body to block my way.
"What you rather talk to the rat than me?" He hisses in my ear.
"You sound jealous." I laugh. He went from being a jealous boyfriend to a jealous friend.
"Let's go to breakfast." I knew that was his way of admitting that he was being ridiculous. We went down the stairs entering the common room.
"Where’s Blaise?" I look around. We normally went down here to walk to the Great Hall.
"I told him that I would get you. Blaise and Pansy are waiting for us at the Great Hall." He wraps his arm around my waist, pulling me out of the common room.
"Why is he with Parkinson?" I scrunch up my face. I didn’t want him to catch any diseases from her.
"Maybe he likes her?" He shrugs his shoulders.
"He would never," I snap not liking the idea of them together at all. I pull out of his grip and began speed walking to the Great Hall.
"Who do you like?" He asks, making me stop in my tracks right in front of the door.
"Nobody," I turn around to face him.
"Really, that’s not what I heard." He narrows his eyes at me.
"And what exactly did you hear?" I was interested to know what rumors where going around about me.
"That you liked Blaise." He stares at my face, waiting for a reaction.
"People at this school are so stupid and immature. A girl and a boy can be just friends." I shook my head. This wasn’t the first time that rumor gone around.
"No need to get upset, I was just asking." He put his hands up in defense.
"You got your answer." I turn back around to open the door.
"Can you afford to lose anymore friends?" Draco stood right behind me. Instead of answering me, I walk into the Great Hall. Insensitive bastard wants me to talk to him, but then says shit like that. I sat across from Blaise, who was sitting next to Parkinson. Draco took a seat next to me. "How was your guy’s morning?" I put on my best fake smile.
"My morning was good, Lopes thanks for asking. How do you think my hair is because at first I was thinking....” Parkinson starts babbling, making me wish I never asked. I look over at Blaise, who was trying not to laugh at the face I was making. I look around the Great Hall and caught Ron glaring at me.
I roll my eyes, he is so aggravating. I look back at Parkinson who was still going on about her hair. "Your hair looks great Pansy, good choice." I cut her off, this conversation need to be done.
"What do you think Draco?" She turns to him.
"You okay," Blaise whispers. I didn’t go into details to Blaise about the whole Robert situation, but he knew that I was heartbroken about it.
"Doing better every day," I grab a blueberry muffin.
"We got Charm next," Blaise reminds me. I let out a big sigh, a class with Robert in it.
"Draco and I got transfiguration." Pansy smirks at me.
"Hey Draco, we can talk later tonight in my dorm." I lick my lips, looking him over.
"Yeah, I'll be there," Draco smiles. I smirk at Parkinson’s scowling face.
"Let's go to class." Blaise drags me out of the Great Hall. "Must you always do that?" He asks as we walk to Charm.
"Do what?" I ask like I had no idea what he was talking about.
"Alright then, what are you going to talk to Draco about?" He gave me a look that let me know he saw right throw me.
"Nothing, I just said that to piss off Pansy." I drop the act. Blaise let out a dry laugh. I stop in front of Charm classroom.
"Ready?" He asks. I took a deep breath before walking inside. I went straight to my seat, not daring to look around and see Robert happy without me. I took my seat and look straight forward. "You’re gonna have to look around at some point." Blaise whispers, after sitting down next to me.
"That is what you think." I kept my head forward. Professor Flitwick began to teach the class. I took notes on what he was saying. The sound of Robert’s laughter fills the room. My whole body tense up, the laugh sound like it was coming from right behind me. Curiosity got the best of me and I look over my shoulder. Robert was laughing at something Susan Bones said. I grit my teeth, facing forward before he noticed me. Blaise grabs my hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. I pick up my pen to go back to taking notes.

Soon the class was done. I quickly gather up my things and shot out of my chair. I rush my way to the door, only to end up bumping into someone and falling right on my bottom. "Watch where you’re going, Miller.” Blaise got in between us.
"She bumped into me, not the other way around." He sneers at Blaise. He didn’t even look at me as he storms out of the room. It hurt to hear him talk about me as if I was so random stranger.
"What a git," Blaise helps me up. I open my mouth to defend Robert out of habit, but I close it when I couldn't find a reason to. "Come on." Blaise led me out of the classroom. "What class do you have next?" He asks.
"Care of magical creature," I told him.
"You have Draco in that class, right?" He asks. I nod my head. "That’s good. I'll see you later." He gave me a hug, before walking off to his next class.
I walk down to Hagrid's hut. Draco was sitting on a tree stump with Parkinson on his lap. Goyle and Crabbe were standing behind him. I turn my head to look at Luna. She looks up and made eye contact with me. I gave her a weak smile. She gave me one back, but quickly put her head down. I let out a sigh as I made my way towards Draco. He pushes Parkinson off his lap when he saw me coming.
"Drackie," She screams, bring a smile to my face. I walk right between Draco's legs just to piss her off. He wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me towards him.
"How did class with Miller go?" He rubs my back in comfort.
"Fine I guess, but I did accidentally bump into him and fell on my ass." I told him, making Parkinson laugh. Draco and I glare at her, making her shut up.
"Do you want me to look at it for you, make sure it's alright?" He let his hands travel down my low back towards my ass. I grab his hands, before it got there.
"Morning class!" Hagrid joyfully greets the class. I turn around still in his arms. He pulls me back, making me sit on his lap. "Today, we are going to learn about Nifflers." He held up a small, fluffy, long narrow snot creature. Hagrid went on to explain all about them. I listen to all the details, since I found the animal to be so cute. "So girls, you should take off your jewelry, because if not they will bite you." Hagrid ends his speech.
"Draco, can you hold my jewelry in your pocket? I don't have any." I ask.
"Sure," he held his hand out. I took off my necklace, bracelets, and rings. "I didn't realize you wearied so much jewelry." He put them in his pocket.
"You gave me most of it," I shrug his shoulder. Making Parkinson look at me alarmed.
"Everyone will get a niffler. You guys go in the forest to look for gold and who ever find the most will get a prize." Hagrid explains the task.
"What’s the prize, one of these ugly looking things?" Parkinson look revolted.
"It’s a surprise." He passes them out. Hagrid hand the smallest one to me and the biggest to Draco. I got off his lap to walk towards the forest with him right behind me. My niffler jump out of my hand and began to dig itself into a hole. It’s head pop back out of the hole, holding a gold coin in its mouth. Draco's niffler jumps out of his hands to ran over to attack my niffler.
"What the hell!" I kick Draco's niffler off of mine. My niffler jumps into my arms.
"Hey! What did you kick mine for?" He stood over it to make sure it was alive.
"Cause yours attacked mine." I held my niffler closer to my chest.
"He could have bitten you. Next time thinks about stuff like that." He scolds me. I blush at his concern. I tried to put my niffler down, but he didn't want to go.
"Look yours scared him so bad that he doesn't want to go down." I pet him in comfort.
"That's not mines fault. You shouldn't have babied him." He snaps, glaring at the animal in my arms.
"Where is yours?" I look around, not seeing him anywhere.
"I don't know. I better look for him seeing how he’s my grade." He began looking around too.
"Malfoy get your niffler!" Cho Chang screams. He was trying to hump Chang's sniffer. Draco and I couldn’t control our laughter. "Get it off!"
"Calm down, pothead lover," Draco grabs his niffler off of hers.
"Come back!" Hagrid call us back. We walk back over to him. "Line up and give me your gold and niffler." Hagrid instructed us. Draco and I got in the back of the line. Luna gave him two pockets full of gold. Goyle gave him a few. Cho gave him a hand full.
"That worthless thing didn't find anything. All it did was attack other nifflers." Draco explains, giving his back to Hagrid.
"Trouble maker this one is." Hagrid put him back in the box. Draco glares at him, for knowingly giving him a bad niffler.
"He only found one, before Draco's one attack him. He didn't want to find anymore after that." I gave Hagrid the one coin and held out my niffler. He tried to grab him, but he bites his hand.
"Ouch," Hagrid cried out. "I was afraid this would happen, one of them getting attached to one of you." He ran his hand through his beard thinking a solution. "If I take him, he'll just keep trying to escape. Maybe I could let you have him." He ponders over his choices.
"No, she already has a lot pets." Draco declines the offer as if he was my father.
"I have one rat." I correct him.
"That is enough," he hisses.
"It looks like you have one more." Hagrid said. This made me and my niffler happy.
"He's a boy, right?" I assume since Draco’s niffler attack it and didn’t hump it.
Hagrid nods his head, before turning back to the class. "The winner is Luna and here your prize." He hands her a bar of chocolate. "Class dismiss," he declares.
"Are you coming?" Draco asks, when he saw I wasn’t moving.
"No, I'm going to visit Krystal." I told him. He bid me goodbye.
"Right this away, Miss Lopes." Hagrid lead me to the barn. I went over to her stall. She reaches her head over for me to pet her.
"Hagrid, how would I take care of this niffler?" I pet Krystal with the hand that wasn't holding him.
"I wouldn't keep him in your dorm, he'll destroy everything." He fills up Krystal’s water.
"Then what do I do?" I ask.
"I would put him by a tree; he’ll make a burrow. You can visit him time from time." He explains.
"I'll go do that now. Bye Krystal." I gave her a kiss on the nose; she gave me a neigh in response. I walk out of the barn and to the Black Lake. "I'm going to name you, Nathan." I told my niffler. He nods his head. "Alright Nathan, I'm going to put you down by this tree, so you can build your new home." I put him down. He stood there looking up at me. "I promise I'll be back. Don't worry, you'll see me again." I reassured him. He nods his head and began digging his hole. I watch him as he finish making his new home. "Bye Nathan," I yell down his burrow.
I was making my way to the Great Hall; when I was pull into a dark classroom. The only light was coming from the cracks in the windows. I narrow my eyes, trying to adjust to the room. "Weasley?" I sneer, noticing that the person had red hair.
"Do you know how angry you make me?" He pins me up against the wall.
"Like you don't make me angry, always glaring at me likes a creep." I try to push him off, but he wouldn’t budge.
"That's because you make me sick. How could you drop your best friend because he is dating a half blood?" He snarls at me.
"You should shut your mouth. You don't know the whole story!" I squirm, causing him to push his body more into me. I could feel the muscles through his clothes as he flexes to keep me in place.
"What’s the whole story?" He moves his face closer to mine. Feeling his breath on my lips made me feel uneasy, I wasn’t sure if it was good or bad thing.
"W-weasley you need to ba-ack it up." I put my hand on his chest, but couldn’t find the strength to push him away.
"I don't think you mean that." He smashes his lips against mine. The kiss was fills with hatred, passion, and lust. I don't know why, but I kiss back with the same force. He tangles one of his hands in my hair to pulls me close to him. I slowly wrap my hands around his neck. He licks my lips asking for entrance and surprisingly to both of us, I let him in. As our tongues dance together, he let his hands drop to my ass giving it a nice squeeze, before letting them rest there.
'I love grabbing onto your ass while we make out.' I heard Draco’s voice inside my head. I pull my lips away from Ron’s. I look into his eyes as he looks back into mine. We could both see that it was just a moment of passion, it didn’t mean anything.
"I'm sorry." He whispers, moving his hands to my hips.
"Do not tell anyone. You'll lose your chances with that bushy hair girl and ruin my reputation." I remove my arms from around his neck.
"Her name is Hermione." He snaps, giving my hips a tight squeeze.
"I don't care." I scoff, rolling my eyes. Ron let out a growl, pulling me into a rough kiss. "Weasley!" I push him completely off of me.
"Sorry, can't control myself when I'm alone with you." He looks at his feet.
"Then make sure we are never alone again." I rush out of there. I look down at my watch and curse. "Great, I miss a class and a half." I said to myself. I’m going fail this year with how much classes I’ve been missing.
I went to my dorm and lay down on my bed. "I can't believe I let Weasley kiss me." I look at Sophia. "I can't believe I enjoy it so much." I play the kiss over again in my head as I stare up at the ceiling. I felt my eyes start to get heavy as I drift off to sleep.

I wake up to someone shaking me. I open my eyes to see Draco standing over me. "You missed dinner again." He passes me a plate of food.
"Thanks," I sat up and took the plate from him.
"So, let's talk." He sat down across from me.
"What?" I look at him confused.
"You said we would talk in your dorm." He reminds me.
"I only said that to piss Parkinson off." I dig into the chicken pot pie.
"I don't care, I want to talk." He glares at me.
"What do you want to talk about?" I ask, knowing that I wasn’t going to get out of this.
"Where's your mom? What do you mean she is dead to you?" He let out his first round of questions.
"My mom ran away with a muggle when I was ten years old, which is why she’s dead to me." I stare at my plate. It made me uncomfortable to talk about my home life. I don’t want people to psychoanalyze or pity me.
"That is disgusting. What did Robert say?" He was coming with a lot of hard questions.
"He said it was my fault my mother left. That she got tired of dealing with me and my tantrums. That she would rather give up her magic and live with a muggle then be with me." I couldn’t help, but let a few tears drop. Draco put the plate on the side and pulls me into a comforting hug. "He has always been there, Draco. He’s the only person whoever been there for me. Why doesn't anyone love me enough to stay?" I cry into his chest.
"You have your dad." He tries to make me feel better.
"Ever since she left, he buries himself in his work. I don't think he likes to look at me, because I look like her." I let out a pathetic sounding sob.
"I'll always be there." He whispers, kissing the top of my head.
"What?" I ask, thinking I heard wrong.
"I'll always be there for you. I'm not like the rest. I'll stay, I promise." He wipes away my tears. I smile at him, putting my head back on his chest.