Even If Saving You Sends Me to Heaven

Danny and I sat in silence for the rest of the night, but it was a comfortable silence that I enjoyed very much. I was glad not to be alone, and the things he’d said gave me plenty to think about, so I wasn’t bored.

Zane was the first to wake up. His headache had returned, but it wasn’t quite as bad as the day before. He grunted when he was aware enough to acknowledge this, and pressed his palm to his forehead.

“What’s wrong with him?” Danny asked me. He wasn’t the least bit concerned, only slightly curious.

I rolled my eyes. “They went to a party Friday night and got completely smashed. He’s still got a headache.”

“What day is it now?” Danny asked.

“It’s Sunday, May 8th,” I answered.

“Wow, that’s a long-lasting hangover,” he noted in an almost skeptical manner that set my nerves on edge.

I was about to retort back when Zane realized whose arm was around him, and a few explicit thoughts crossed his mind. I curled my lip in disgust.

“What now?” Danny inquired with amusement.

“He’s well enough to be quite thrilled that Mara is here,” I spat, only getting more irritated when Danny laughed at me.

“Reading my expression and realizing he may have gone too far, he explained, “I know how you feel. Sometimes it’s helpful and informative to hear their thoughts, but other times… it’s just too much.”

I snorted my agreement.

“I highly suggest you don’t block his thoughts unless it’s truly unbearable, though,” Danny added. “My first time doing this job, I failed because of that.” The same shadow that had crept across his face the night before when he’s spoken of “failing” did the same thing now, and I figured that Danny was not as confident and ignorant as he made himself seem.

Despite his recent advice, Danny grimaced when Mara woke up to find Zane staring at her intently, and they kissed. It was my turn to laugh at his face.

“I can’t imagine it’ll get any better,” I said. “I’m sure Mara will stay all day to make sure Zane is better.”

“She fully intends to stay,” Danny confirmed for me.

“Of course. She had to take care of him,” I grumbled.

He gave me a funny look. “You say that almost grudgingly. Don’t you want him to feel better?”

“Well, yeah,” I admitted. “His headache is practically my headache. I just with it didn’t involve Mara.”

Danny was till looking at me with a weird expression, but he didn’t say anything else.

“Are you feeling any better?” Mara crooned sympathetically.

Zane leaned in and kissed her forcefully, answering, “Almost one-hundred percent better.” I laughed shortly and shook my head at Danny, indicating that this was not the truth.

“Good,” Mara said, playfully pushing him away. “You must be starving, so I’ll go down and make you breakfast.” She got up, but she hesitated. “Your uncle isn’t home, is he?”

Zane waved his hand dismissively. “I doubt it. If he is, it’s not like he’ll care.”

“Still, it’s awkward,” Mara mumbled, moving towards the door.

“I’ll have to follow,” Danny reminded me, standing up. His huge, glorious wings came to my attention again, and I was transfixed and envious.

Before Danny exited the room after Mara, he turned around, saw my gaze, and winked.

I sighed and, tuning to Zane, I dismissed his ravaging hunger as unimportant and returned to pondering about Danny.

I felt that our long hours of not talking were filled with more than just silence. I’d wanted to ask him about himself; about how old he was, how he’d died, if he’d left behind anyone he loved. However, I knew if I asked him, he would ask me the same questions back, and I surely wasn’t ready to talk about it, especially with a stranger. Likewise, I thought his unwillingness to ask me anything was for the same reason. I thought we both understood that we were on a strict “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy that would’ve been comical if it wasn’t so serious.

As the smell of bacon and sausage reached Zane’s nose, his hunger became harder to ignore. I went to the door and called down to Danny, “How much longer? Zane’s stomach is about to implode!”

Before Danny called up, “Almost done, shut up!” something strange happened. For a fraction of a second, Zane somehow responded to his name. He hadn’t heard me and he wasn’t suspicious of anything weird going on, but a small part of his consciousness twisted in response to his name.

It disappeared almost before it occurred, and Zane got up to change. I turned my eyes away once more. A little after, he looked halfway decent and sat on his bed, Mara arrived carrying food, oblivious to the angel in tow.

“Danny,” I asked, while they sat together and began to eat on Zane’s bed, “is it possible for them to sort of hear us, even if we don’t intend them to?”

“If you’re asking if they can see or hear us without our consent, the answer is ‘no,’” he replied. “But if you’re asking if they sometimes have a way of knowing that we’re here without even admitting it to themselves, the answer is ‘yes.’”

“How strange,” I mused.

“Why do you ask?”

“Zane just responded when I yelled his name down to you,” I told him.

Danny smiled. “It’s a curious thing. Wait until you actually show yourself to him if you get the chance to save him that way. It’s even stranger, I assure you.”

Once again, Danny left me wondering how he know so much.