Even If Saving You Sends Me to Heaven

Zane fell asleep in the rowboat. At first I was going to wake him, but I decided to let him get as much sleep as he could.

I spent the night looking at the water and the back of the giant house that only one man, one teenage boy, and one little girl lived in. I wondered how much money it cost Zane’s uncle to pay someone to clean it.

When I got really bored I remembered my wings. When I reached up my back to feel them, my shirt felt tighter. My wings were indeed growing. There were no longer two lumps of fuzzy feathers on my back. They were now two small wings the size of a bird’s.

Curious as to what color they were, I bit my lip and plucked one small feather. Under the growing dawn’s light, I saw that it was a misty blue. I thought it was prettier than Danny’s black, but not as sleek and glossy. I dropped the feather in the boat.

Zane was very confused when the bright morning sun woke him up. He didn’t remember how he’d gotten on the rowboat no matter how hard he tried. This worried me. There was no reason he should’ve forgotten. He’d been completely sober and totally awake.

It didn’t take him long to piece together what actually had happened, and then he urgently rowed back to shore. He was worried he would be late for school. He saw that he had plenty of time when he got inside and saw Samantha still sleeping. Zane’s uncle was in the kitchen and saw him come in, but he didn’t ask where he’d been.

Zane went to his room and got dressed. He found that his uncle had already left when he went to eat cereal. Samantha came downstairs shortly after.

“My car broke, so Mara’s going to take me to school,” he told her.

Samantha looked upset. “Can she take me too?”

Zane was about to say no, but he had a change of heart and grumbled, “Whatever,” surprising both me and Samantha.

Mara arrived on time to pick Zane up, and with Mara came Danny.

“Good morning,” Danny greeted me happily while Zane and Mara shared a much warmer, distracting greeting.

I couldn’t help but return Danny’s friendly smile, but I shook my head and replied, “I’m going to get sick of you really fast.”

“We’ll see,” he retorted. We had to pile into the back seat of Mara’s car with Samantha. I had to squeeze in the middle. Not wanting to make awkward non-contact with Samantha and go through her like a ghost but also not wanting to press too hard against Danny, I felt uncomfortable.

Danny noticed my uneasiness and said, “If you really want, I’ll fly over the car, but I don’t think your chicken wings are big enough to do the same.”

I huffed and relaxed, replying indignantly, “No, I’m perfectly fine.” Danny left me alone for a little while.

After they’d dropped of Samantha, Zane stared at Mara’s face. Once again, he was wondering what he would do if she didn’t feel the same way about him.

“What are you thinking about?” Danny asked me. He’d caught me watching Zane watch Mara.

“Does Mara love Zane?” I countered, not answering his question. Before he could reply, I added, “I mean, does she really love him in the right way for the right reasons?”

Danny played my game and asked another question. “Why do you want to know?” He was grinning mischievously.

He caught me off guard. “I – I don’t know,” I stammered.

“Is it because you care? You, Arianna, and you claim to hate Zane?” he inquired mockingly.

I rolled my eyes. “Come on, Danny, give me a break. Yeah, I want to know because I sort of care.”

“Alright then. Mara really does love Zane. Happy now?” Danny replied almost grudgingly.

“Yes, I am,” I admitted.

“You should be careful though,” Danny warned, suddenly looking darker and more serious.

“Why?” I asked. I was trying to sound like I didn’t care, but I was worried about what his answer would be.

“Caring leads to loving,” he informed me wisely.

I snorted, grinned, and asked, “How would you know?”

My smile faded when he didn’t answer me. I didn’t push him further, fearing it would only make things worse.

Danny seemed back to normal in Zane and Mara’s first class. I stood uneasily behind Zane, while Danny lounged in an empty desk behind Mara.

He looked at me with interest. “Is everything alright? Aren’t you going to sit down?”

I shook my head. “I don’t like schools.”

He laughed, saying, “I’m not a fan of learning either.”

”No, I like learning, just not schools,” I corrected.

I wanted this conversation to end, but he continued it. “Why is that? Didn’t you have to go to high school?”

“Not for very long,” I stated.

“Did you drop out?” he pressed.

“No. After most of my freshman year I was home schooled,” I answered honestly, getting less and less comfortable.

“Because you hated going to school?”

“Because I couldn’t go to school,” I replied, looking down.

“Why not?”

When I risked a glance at Danny, I saw him leaning forward, eagerly waiting for my answer. He never got one. If he was allowed to withhold answers, so was I.