She's Just The White Envelope Girl

“And I wonder were you scared when the metal hit the glass?
See, I was playing a show down the road
when your spirit left your body.
And they told me on the front lawn.
I'm sorry I couldn't go,
But I still know the song and the words and her name and the reasons.
And I know 'cause we were kids and we used to hang.
And I know ‘cause we were kids and we used to hang”My phone rang, non-stop.

“Ugh!” I whined, getting out of bed. I looked at my phone and saw it was just my alarm. 7:30 is too early for me. I just want to wake up at a later time.

Today was the day we go back to school from winter break. What joy!

I have what people call people problems. I am very shy and quiet. I don’t have any friends, never really did, except my imaginary friend Avon, but he’s long gone.

I went to go take a shower, then blow dried my hair and straightened it. I don’t like attention, so I try to dress in clothes that don’t catch people’s attention. I did my make up, like, I said, not too much attention grabber. Then, I put on my clothes; I chose a button up plaid shirt blue and black, with some skinny jeans, my black chucks, and my special necklace.

I looked at the clock, 8:05. I have till 8:30. I went to my small kitchen and got a green apple. I hate red ones. The green one has more flavor, especially the sour flavor, my favorite.

I haven’t told you my name, or anything else more important? My bad, my name is Rosalie Faith Carter. I barely talk in school, only when teachers ask me questions (which are barely). I haven’t had a friend since I was 11. I love to read, write, play my guitar, and read some more. I hate being called Rosie, Rose, Rosa, no nicknames. They all have a past to it. I’m short, like 5’4, 14 years old, quiet, shy, nice (But who would know?), independent and I love music.

My parents are divorced. I live with my mom. My mom is a total wreck; I never see her. She is either asleep or at work. She works a bakery warehouse from 4 in the morning to, like, 2pm. And when she gets home, she gets something to eat, but that’s before I’m here from school, and goes take a “nap”, in other words, a nap from 3pm to 9pm. Then, she takes a shower and goes back to sleep.

My dad took all the money and lives a new life, family, wife, house, a different person. He hasn’t called or made any other contact, but I don’t ever want him to.

I live in a little house, always clean, because of me; we barely have enough money to pay the house now. Wondering how I buy all my stuff? Well before my dad left, I “borrowed” some money, as in like 5 thousand dollars. I still have some, but not a lot. Also, that was a long time since we had the money. It’s practically wasted, because my mom stole some of MY money. Why? I don’t know.

I looked at the clock, 8:15. Better get going. I walked out the front door and started to walk to school. I rather like to walk than take the bus. It has too much germs, crowded loud people, very unclean, and stinky. I’m not a clean freak, but the bus is disgusting. Anyways, I love to walk fresh air in the morning, no one to push you around, or yell in your ear.

I took out my Mp3 player, notice I didn’t say iPod, and put my ear buds in. I picked a random song and kept walking.

“She's upset
Bad day
Heads for the dresser drawer to
Drive her pain away
Nothing good can come of this.
She opens it there's nothing
There is only left over tears
Mom and dad had no right she screams
As the anger runs down both of her cheeks.

Then she closed her eyes
And found relief in a knife
The blood flows she cries

All alone the way she feels
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief
Bite the lip, just forget the bleeding”My ear buds blasted full blast.

I reached the school, Acoustic Wood High, and made my way to my class. As I was walking, I saw from the corner of my, people in groups talking to their friends about how was their break, what did you get for Christmas, you know the usual.

Sometimes, I wished I had at least one friend. Before, I had a lot of friends, but, my life started to change my parents divorced, my “friends” started to talk behind my back, what my dad and uncle did to me, and my best friend wasn’t around for those things. So, I managed to shut everybody out, not letting anybody in even my mom. Sad? I know, but I managed to live with it.

I walked into the semi-full class and took my seat in the back.

“Welcome, students! I hope you had a wonderful break, but it’s time to get to work!” My cheery teacher yelled out to the class.