A.N.O.R.E.X.I.A

ft. Dean Winchester & Lara Singer.



“Of course, the Vatican is in...?”

“...Paris?”

“You're kidding right?” I turned around in my seat to face the idiot.

“Oh shut up, you nerdy bitch.”

“Why don't you go--!” “Children!” The teacher stepped in, stopping me from ripping the head of that rabid little...

She sighed as she heard the bell, “We will continue this lesson tomorrow class.”

I gathered my binder, feeling someone shove passed me, and my hip dug into the desk. “Ouch...asshole.” I muttered, before glaring after the bane of my existence. His name; Dean Winchester. Or Mr. Popular would be rather appropriate also, as well as manwhore and dickwad.

“Hey!” Ruby said, as I walked into Japanese. Ruby was my best friend, we had our ups and downs, but all around she was pretty amazing. She was the dark to my light, she has brunette hair, I have dirty blonde, she's loud and outspoken, I'm generally quiet and not-so-compulsive...except around certain people.

“What did he do this time?”

I looked over at her innocently, “Who? What?”

She cracked a smile, “Dean Winchester. Nobody but him could get you all riled up.”

“I am not all riled up!”

I heard a snort from across the table and turned around, snapping, “Shut up, devil consorter!”

That was Castiel, he was the third man to our four man table, the table which as of yet doesn't have a fourth man. Castiel's a pretty good guy, he seems nice. We could be friends except for his aforementioned sin – consorting with pure evil. His best friend? The devil himself.

“Seriously man, who thinks the Vatican is in France?!”

Castiel snorted with laughter, “It's not like he takes Religion.”

“It's general knowledge!” I growled, glowering down at the table that had done nothing to me.

“Come on, it's not like he's dumb, he's just...uninformed.” Ruby said, and I turned to her.

“Don't talk to me. You're consorting with the enemy too.”

“How am I?”She shot back, “I don't even talk to him!”

“Crushing on his younger brother totally counts Ruby.” I shook my head, laughing as she turned red. It was common knowledge to everyone in our group that Ruby has this massive crush on Sam Winchester, who was in a lower grade than us, something we liked to bring up incessantly.

When Japanese lesson passed we headed out to meet the group at the front of the school as it was the last lesson of the day. It was an incredibly hot day and we had all decided at lunchtime that we would meet up this afternoon and go to the beach. We all had beach stuff with us, it was what we normally did in summer.

When we got there Anna was waiting. Anna was two years younger than us, in the same grade as Sam, she became our friend almost instantly when she arrived at our school six months ago. She has this strange hateful relationship with Castiel though, something I couldn't figure out since he seemed nice enough.

Clearly Anna wasn't too impressed when she saw him with us. She never said anything, always the polite one Anna, but we could tell.

Completing our little group was Jo Harvelle, Chuck Shurley – the guy of the gang. Jo was a sweetheart with a vicious streak and Chuck...Chuck was pretty much the same, just without the vicious streak.

We made small talk for a minute or two before I noticed Castiel had disappeared. “Hey, where's-...no way.”

The others turned around, prompted by my jaw dropping to the ground. Castiel was with a small group of his own. The first thing that came to mind was, yes, Castiel is popular but no, that does not mean his little group have to follow him everwhere, what the hell were they doing here?

Hearing Ruby growl, I noticed that it wasn't just a few of the boys, it was also a few of the girls and the first one my eyes landed on was Jessica Moore, and with one look at her I could tell exactly what set Ruby off. She was literally all over Sam Winchester. Oh dear. That was a big no no with Ruby around.

Another glance showed my greatest fears realised, yes, Dean Winchester was also present...and so was his girlfriend, Bela Talbot. She was hard to miss the way she was hanging all over him. It'll be hilarious when he realises she only wants to be “Dean Winchester's girlfriend”, not actually be his girlfriend. I can honestly say I hate her, just because she's a massive sluz. And yes, that is in fact, a word, thank you very much.

A few others from their group were also there including Pamela Barnes, a girl from my history class and Uriel, a guy who I'd seen around a few times but found a little too creepy for my tastes.

Ruby shifted beside me, “Lara, I know you don't want to go anywhere with them, but-.”

“Ruby, it's okay.” I cut her off, “I get it, Sam's going. You know I'll come with, I'll just...sit on the sand.”

“What's the deal Lara? You know we won't let them bother you, come swimming.” Jo said and I looked down.

“Like I'm going to take my clothes off with them around, let's just go guys.” They went quiet as I shook my head and walked towards the other group.

“Cas, we're taking off, We'll see you there.” He nodded and I could still feel Dean's eyes glaring into my shoulders as I walked towards my car.

I drive a blue 1969 SS Camaro, it's a classic muscle car and I love it. In fact, as hard as it is for me to admit, I'm partial to Dean's Impala, but that's something I'll take to my grave.

It wasn't far to the beach and after our discussion in front of the school, the group was silent. Ruby was riding shotgun, leaving Anna, Jo & Chuck to share the back seat.

Itching to break the silence I said “So...” But at the same time, so did Chuck. I laughed, “You go.”

“Lara,” he started hesitantly, “You know you're not fat right?” He cringed as soon as he said it as though I was going to kick him out after the words left his mouth.

“Sure,” I lied. “I just don't want to go swimming with all of them around.”

“What Chuck means to say is that we're worried about you,” Anna started, sounding sure of her self, ever the confidant one. “You don't eat much and you're getting thinner and thinner. You're wasting away Lara.”

I glared this time, through the rear view mirror. Anyone else would have gotten angry, but not me. Not Lara. I just felt like crying.

“I eat all the time.”

“No. You don't. Y-.”

“This conversation is over.” I said firmly, turning up the radio and blasting Lady Gaga the rest of the way.

When we got to the beach and the rest of the group slipped off their clothes revealing swimmers, I locked up the car and sat down on the sand, just close enough that the water lapped at my feet.

Soon enough the other group arrived and I watched as Ruby made move after move on Sam and I smiled. If anyone could get the guy, it would be her. Jo and Chuck began shoving each other under the waves and I frowned as Anna picked up a piece of seaweed, it turned into a choked laugh however when a minute later it his the back of Castiel's head. He turned around and she innocently swam under a wave, not even glancing his way.

I looked up when I felt water dripping on my nice, dry clothes, frowning at the looming form of the older Winchester.

“What do you want?” I snarled, glaring up at him. I swear I'm not normally like this, he brings out the worst in me.

“What's wrong?” He snipped, “Can't swim?”

In rolled my eyes, “Of course I can you idiot, I just don't want to.”

“Well that's too bad.”

My eyes widened as he grabbed me roughly, throwing me over his shoulder and walking a few steps before throwing me into the surf. I surfaced, completely soaked and gasping for air.

“You son of a bitch!” I growled, before pushing him over into the waves.

Walking a few steps back I attempted to pull of my sopping clothing, turning around when I finally succeeded only to see him staring at me with a frown.

“What?!” I snapped, before stomping passed him and diving into the water in a hopefully inconspicuous effort to cover up my body.

Ruby looked over at me with a questioning gaze, seeming to ask, “Would you like me to beat the shit out of him?” I shook my head, seeing how she was floating around chatting with Sam and I knew that she was over the moon on the inside.

I swam up to Anna and sighed as we began to float on our backs. “They're all morons, the entire sex.” She said quietly, “there isn't much we can do.”

I laughed, “You're right, they're a bunch of dickheads.”

“I resent that!” I opened my eyes to see Chuck looming above me. “Aw, not you Chuck, you know you're one of the girls.” We all laughed at that one.



I felt really tired that afternoon for some reason, I hadn't eaten much, at least less than I normally do. I dropped everyone off then headed home and when I got to the lounge room I began to feel a little woozy and the first thing I did was yell out to my Uncle Bobby, unfortunately that was also the last thing because after that I was falling, I never felt myself hit the ground.



The first thing I saw was really, really bright, white light. I thought I was dead, but after a moment for my eyes to adjust, I realised I was in a hospital. Struggling to sit up, my eyes finally adjusted to see three people sitting around me. I had an IV in my arm and tubes everywhere. In front of me was my uncle Bobby, Ruby was to the left and to right was somebody who had no right to be there whatsoever.

“What's going on?” I said hoarsely and their eyes snapped up to me.

“You stupid, stupid girl.” Bobby muttered, before giving me a hard look and I knew he was furious, what I didn't get was why. And what the hell Winchester had to do with it for that matter.

“I'm getting a coffee” Bobby said, before giving a significant look to Ruby as he left.

I turned to her, “Why am I here?” And after getting a glass of water continued more strongly, “And why the hell is he here?” I nodded my head to the right.

Ruby just looked at me silently.

“What?! Do I have cancer?” Dean gave a shaky laugh and I turned to him questioningly.

He just looked down and I turned back to Ruby, starting to get really cranky.

“Seriously what the hell is up!?”

She silently handed me the board at the end of the bed and I stared, not comprehending the words. Until that moment I couldn't have imagined eight letters could change my life forever. A. N. O. R. E. X. I. A. Anorexia.

“No...” I whispered, looking up at my best friend. “No! I don't have anorexia! This is wrong! It's wrong Ruby!”

I went to rip the IV out of my arm but was stopped by a hand grabbing mine. “And what the hell are you doing here?” I glared at him.

Pulling my hand back from the IV he looked at loss for what to say.

“He's here because this is his fault.” Ruby said venomously and I didn't understand until she waved a green book in the air that she had been holding onto – it was my journal. And suddenly it all made sense.

“What the hell Ruby?!” I yelled at her, “That's my private stuff! You can't just-.”

“You've been asleep for four days! You were diagnosed with anorexia, we had to find out why!”

“And what exactly did you find out? Because I don't remember writing in there about my “anorexia” considering I don't HAVE anorexia!”

A deeper voice interrupted, and until then I had forgotten he was in the room. “Dean Winchester is an asshole. I hate him so much. I hate that he always knows exactly what to say to hurt me. I know that I'm not skinny, not even average size, and he knows it too. I can't help it if I eat too much.” He finished and looked up expressionless.

“Get out.” I said dangerously.

“No.”

“Get out.” I choked and this time it was Ruby who said, “No.”

I sobbed as finally the tears came, turning to bury my head into the blankets and screamed as warm arms wrapped around me. “I hate you!” I yelled at him, pushing at his arms and gouging with my fingernails. “God, I hate you so much!”

“I hate you too,” he whispered, so soft I almost missed it and I cried. Why did he have to be so calm? I punched him over and over, doing no damage at all, before loosing all my energy and just crying.



I must have fallen asleep somehow because the next thing I knew, I was waking up and it was dark. I was clinging to someone and I turned, expecting to see Ruby, only to see Dean and that's when it all came flooding back.

I tried to get up and after five minutes of untangling tubes and getting my bearings, my feet hit the floor and I grabbed the IV for balance.

“Where do you think you're going?” A rough voice said behind me and I turned around.

“Outside.” I told him, before turning back to walk to the door.

“Oh no you're not.” He grabbed me. “It's freezing outside and you've been sick.”

“I'm fine.” I said quietly, but he interrupted me again.

“No, you're not. You've been asleep for four and a half days after falling unconscious from starvation and have only been fed through tubing! You're not going anywhere unless it's to the cafeteria.” He exclaimed, waving his arms around.

“Don't treat me like a child!” I said, tears welling in my eyes.

“I'm not! Look, – oh god, don't cry.”

“I'm not –.” I looked down, rubbing at my eyes furiously.

“I'm sorry.” He said desperately, “what I mean is...just eat something? Please?” I just looked up at him silently before he tried again. “How about this, you come to the hospital cafeteria and eat a meal of my choosing, and then, we'll go outside.”

Slowly, I nodded my head. I should have known from the beginning that agreeing to eat any meal Dean Winchester chose was a death sentence. I was hoping that the cafeteria would be shut at this time of night and I wouldn't have to, but unfortunately this was a hospital and apparently they're open 24/7.

So now, I was lost in my own self misery, staring down at a double bacon cheeseburger, willing it to just disappear. Dean on the other hand was scoffing down a pie like there was no tomorrow and I looked over at him with wide eyes before slowly taking a bite out of the cheeseburger.

I think it was easier for me than it should have been. I had been trying so hard to be skinny that I hadn't realised just how thin I had already gotten, not even after the group had brought it up. And I liked this food, it tasted good. I choked back my gag reflex and slowly forced myself to eat.

“I didn't mean it you know.”

I looked up at him, raising an eyebrow.

“Calling you fat or whatever it was that I said. God, that sounds so bad, that I don't even remember what it was.”

“It's okay.” I said, and he looked at me incredulously,

“Really? Because it sure as hell doesn't look like it from where I'm sitting!”

“Shut up! Seriously Dean, I'm fine. You have been a right asshole to me since the day we met,” I said and he looked at the ground, “But I've been a horrible bitch to you as well and I'm sorry for that.”

“You believe me though right?” He said, “honestly, you were never overweight, if anything you're fucking hot –.” He stopped, probably realising that wasn't supposed to come out.

I looked at him with wide eyes.

We both looked down for a minute before I said quietly, “You're pretty hot yourself.” And we both began to laugh. “C'mon,” He said, grabbing my hand, “I promised you I'd take you outside.”



It was a Saturday morning and I found myself working in the garage for my uncle, Bobby. He ran a salvage yard and everyone in town knew, if there was something wrong with your car, go see Bobby Singer.

However, I had been out of hospital for a week now and my weight was back to average so Uncle Bobby had decided it was time to start my punishment for 'being such a stupid girl'. So on this particular day, if you needed something done with your car, you had to see Lara Singer and that would be me.

I was sitting on the workbench in jeans and a singlet, sipping a coke when I heard an engine rumble and was greeted by the sight of Dean's beautiful '67 Chev Impala. He parked it, stepping out in jeans and a button up tee with his usual leather jacket.

“No way.” He said, swaggering towards me.

“Yes way.” I said, hopping off the bench to meet him halfway.

“I mean, I knew Bobby was your Uncle, but when he said he had someone else doing the work today I didn't think it would be you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You are such a liar Dean Winchester.”

He put on an innocent face, “Me? Why?”

I laughed, “I know you well enough to know that you could fix anything that may have gone wrong with your beautiful car.”

He looked like a child caught red handed with the cookie jar. “Uh...”

“So, that means you came to see me.” I decided to make it easier on him, “so why?”

“Cas told me to.” He blurted out before smacking a hand to his forehead, “that's totally not what I meant! I mean, It wasn't supposed to sound like that!”

“So what do you mean?” I asked, still confused.

He looked to the side, clenching his fist, before pulling me towards him and before I knew it, his lips were on mine. Nothing, nothing in this world, is like kissing Dean Winchester. I felt my stomach do one thousand flips over and over again. I was twisted around and I groaned as he pushed me back onto the hood of the Impala. As he covered my body with his I looked up at him. Green eyes looked back.

“I can't do this.” I said, before pushing him off me and running.

“Lara! Lara, wait!”

I could hear him yell after me, but all I could do was run. When I finally stopped I found myself in an old shell of a 56 Mustang, rusted with age and I sank down to my knees and cried.



The next day I had to go back to school and I was dreading it. Not because of my trip to hospital, but because of seeing Dean. The only people that knew about my hospital visit were my group, Dean and Castiel, who I knew wouldn't tell anyone. But the prospect of facing Dean had me terrified.

He brings out the worst in me. I'm never loud or outspoken. I'm just quiet little Lara Singer. Or at east I was, until I met him. He gets under my skin and makes my blood boil in both bad and, as I have discovered, good ways. I think that morning, as I walked to my car, shaking, I finally realised, I love Dean Winchester. I am in love with him and I completely blew my chance.

When I got out my car, the Impala was already parked and he was sitting on the hood in his usual jeans, tee and leather jacket ensemble. I almost smiled, but his arm was wrapped around Bela Talbot, and he didn't even glance my way. Bela did though and smirked at me before grabbing his chin and pulling him down to meet her lips.

I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders, walking up through the front grounds and that's where it all fell apart. Ruby was sitting on the tabletop, her tongue down Sam's throat and on the grass next to them Castiel and Anna were sitting, their hands just touching, heads tossed back in laughter.

I choked on a sob, before running as fast as I could into the school and to the girls bathroom where I curled up in a ball on the floor and cried.

“Lara?” I met Ruby's brown eyes with my own red-rimmed ones and laughed.

“I'm such an idiot.”

“What happened?” She asked, but I ignored her.

“You guys are all so happy, you and Sam, Anna and Cas, probably even Jo and Chuck! But not me! No, not Lara Singer!”

“You have Dean!”

That just made me sob harder.

“I know you like him Lara, it's okay to like him.”

“Ruby, it's not that, god. I love him. I didn't even realise, but then he kissed me and I freaked out and I ruined everything!”

“He kissed you?” She said quietly and I nodded.

“We pretty much started to make outon the hood of the Impala and I freaked and now...”

She shook her head, “Doesn't mean you can't still have him.”

“It does! I sobbed. He's with Bela and she knows it! She even smirked at me in the carpark, she probably won't let him anywhere near me. We'll probably never talk again!” I wailed.

I sunk back into my corner before suddenly my cheek stung. She had slapped me.

“Man up!” She spat, in true Ruby style.

I looked up at her, shocked and her face softened. “Honey, I know this isn't your usual style, but you can't just sit around and wait or you might really miss your chance. You can't just wait for him to come to you honey, it's Dean, the Dean, Dean Winchester, he's not going to come running again. You have to go out there and take what you want.”

I slowly stood up. “You're right.” I fixed myself up in the mirror, so it wasn't as obvious that I had been balling my eyes out.

“I know, I'm great at inspirational speeches right? Now go out there, and take what's yours. Go get 'em tiger!” She patted me on the back and handed me a soda can. “Here, you might need this.” She winked.

And I laughed. Dean Winchester really brings out the worst in me. I ran out of the school slowing to a walk as I saw the Impala. He was still there and so was she. As soon as she saw me coming she had her tongue down his throat.

I knew he didn't see me however and it was confirmed by the look on his face when I ripped that slut away from him by the hair and poured soda: All. Over. Her.

I smiled, “Stay the hell away from my boyfriend, bitch.”

Shoving her away from the Impala and Dean, I leaned up to his shocked face and attached my lips to his.

“I hate you,” I whispered, smiling as he breathed out a shaky laugh.

“I hate you too.”