I don't need you

I can't believe I'm doing this. After about an hour of debating with myself I've caved in and I'm going to Joe's party, it's just gone 7 and I still need to find something to wear. It's a good thing I wear dresses otherwise I'd be screwed. Staring at the contents of my wardrobe I flicked though everything, who am I kidding I don't have dresses for a night out..... Actually I do still have that dress from my cousins wedding last year which I was forced to go to.

**

Staring at myself in the mirror I cant help but feel stupid, it's like I'm trying too hard by getting dressed up. I really don't know why I'm doing this, kicking off my shoes I sat down on my bed putting my head in my hands. It's already 8 there's no point going now, but I have just spent all this time getting dressed and doing my hair and make up. I can stay 5 minutes and if I hate it then i'll leave..... yea thats good, i'll do that. I'll stop by, say hi then leave.
Standing up I put my shoes back on grabbed my clutch and my coat, sticking my head out the bedroom door I made sure Allen wasn't nearby before carefully making my way down the stairs.
Quietly opening the front door I slipped outside and put my coat on, right there's no going back now.

***

Just ring the doorbell, just do it! I reached out and pressed the button. If the door doesn't open in 10 seconds I'm going, 8.7.6.5.4.3.2 ok times up.
Just as I was about to turn around I heard the door open, damn it!
"Er.. hi" I smiled nervously looking at Joe as he stood at the door.
"Erica. You came!" Joe stepped out and hugged me, what do I do? This doesn't really happen to me, should I hug him back?
"Yea, I don't know why I'm here." I lightly pushed him away from me "I should go."
"No wait." he took hold my arm making me stop "Come inside.... please." he smiled
"It's looks like you've got plenty of guests already, I didn't even want to come anyway."
"Then why did you?" he asked...... good question, why am I here?
"I don't know." I shrugged
"Just stay for a little while, you did come all this way. And you look great by the way."
Oh good he's looking at me, I feel so exposed!
"If I'm honest I feel a little overdressed." I looked down at myself shifting uncomfortably
"Trust me, compared to the outfits some girls a wearing you look like a nun." he laughed
"Er... thanks, I think."
"Well come on."
Biting my lip I stepped forward ignoring Joe's hand which he held out for me to take. Going inside I couldn't help but feel really nervous and like everyone was watching me.
"I can't do this." I whispered to Joe as I stood still
"Why not?" he asked placing his hand on my back
"People are watching me and I don't like it."
"No one is watching you.... ok maybe a few people are but thats just because you don't go to these things, and they're surprised." he lightly steered me through the people and towards the living room
"Can I just go home?" I muttered
"I'll tell you what, stay for half an hour and if you still want to go then you can."
"Ok fine." I squeezed through the groups of people and into the living room, I can't believe I'm doing this.
"Ok, I've gotta go sort out some stuff, I'll be back in 5 minutes." Joe whispered him my ear his hand brushing against my arm.
"You can't leave me alone."
"Look who wants me around now." he smirked while nudging me in the arm
"No, I would just rather not be standing alone in a corner of the room." I quickly explained
"You'll be fine... go mingle." I stumbled forward as he gave me a light push into the crowded room making me accidently bump into someone.
"Oh I'm sorry." I apologized as the guy turned round
"I know you, your in my english class.... Erica, right?" he smiled
"Yea." I nodded "And your... Dale?"
"Daniel." he corrected me
"Oh right, I'm sorry."
"It's cool don't worry about it. So it's a surprised to see you here, didn't you have a breakdown or something and now you like hate everyone."
A breakdown! I didn't have a breakdown.... people think I had a breakdown?
"No, not exactly." I sighed trying not to show that I was offended
"Oh... well it's good to see you're finally normal again, and you're looking hot." Oh god he's looking at me too.... I need to leave
"Er, can you hold on for like 1 minute. I've gotta- yea" I quickly turned round leaving the room, where the hell is Joe?

"There you are!" Finding him in the kitchen getting more drinks out of the fridge I tapped him on the shoulder
"Can't handle being without me?" he smirked as he closed the fridge with his foot
"I'm going home."
"Why?" he asked putting the bottles on the counter
"Because people think I'm crazy, and one guy just told me he was glad that I was normal again."
"Your over reacting. Here, have a drink, and go make friends." he pushed a bottle of beer into my hand and spun me round.
"I don't want to make friends." I groaned
"Just go, I'll come find you in 10 minutes." I glared at him when he lightly slapped my butt and pushed me towards the door.

*****

10 minutes.... please it's been half an hour and i've been standing in the corner drinking non-stop just so I have something to do. Screw this, I'm going to the toilet then I'm going home.
I really don't remember these heels being hard to walk in, I guess this is what happens when you don't move for ages...... either that or i've drunk more then I thought.
Weaving in and out of people I finally made it to the staircase which seemed to take forever to get to the top of.
"Where's the bathroom?" I asked some girl who was on the phone, she pointed to the door at the end of the hallway.

I went to open the door but it was locked so I sat on the floor and waited for the person to come out. There's no point standing up, besides my legs hurt.
"Come on!" I groaned as I repeatedly hit the door with the back of my hand after a few more seconds the door opened "Finally" I went to stand up but fell back down again "Ow" I groaned
"How much have you drank?" a voice asked from above me
"I lost count." I shrugged looking up Joe was stood over me "Oh hey Joe" I smiled
"I think it's time for someone to get home." he sighed put his arms around me and tried to pull me up but I pushed them away.
"No! Allen doesn't know I snuck out, if you take me home he'll realize." I lent my head against the wall and crossed my arms, I am not risking more torture from that bastard.
"Who's Allen?" Joe asked as he squatted to my level
"You know!! My stepdad, hello!! If he knew I snuck out, I'd be in really big trouble, so you cant tell him ok. You have to keep that shh" I put my fingers to my lips and briefly closed my eyes
"Ok" he nodded while lifting my head up
"This must be why he drinks, I feel really carefree right now..... Oops I shouldn't have said that either..... Don't tell people he drinks that's a secret too." I put my fingertips over his mouth "Wow I'm going to be in so much trouble." I muttered, taking my hand off his mouth I rubbed my forehead.
"Im sure he'll understand."
"Yea, ok. You clearly don't know Allen, he's mean. So when I say trouble I mean trouble."
"What kind of trouble?" Joe asked trying to straighten me up
"Did you know I snuck out, he doesn't know i'm here."
"You said that already, look Erica what kind of trouble do you mean?"
"I did? Did I tell you that he drinks, and that he once took my money to buy alcohol." I slouched forward resting my head on my knees
"Erica, get up." Joe put his arm around me again and tried to lift me up again
"No! I'm tired." I groaned slapping his hands away
"Erica you can't sit on the floor."