Your Hand In Mine

The next morning I woke up to the beeping sound of a large truck backing up. It was obnoxious. I rolled over to face the other side of the room, in hopes that Kris was laying next to me. Instead of seeing him sleeping soundly, I only saw the place where he had once been. But he did leave a sheet of paper with something written on it and a.. what is that? A toy? What the hell. I quickly reached over and unfolded the paper and grabbed the toy.

To the girl who put a smile on my face,
Sorry that I wasn't there when you woke up. We had an early
practice and I forget to tell you. Be here when I get back?
-The boy who is lucky to have a girl like you in his life

P.S. I would have left you a flower, but it is the middle of winter
and I don't have a garden. So I left you a Star Wars action
figure that I got from my cereal this morning instead. May the force be
with you.

As I read, a smile appeared on my face, and when I got to the 'P.S.' part, I laughed at how cute he was. Then I picked up the toy and realized that it was Yoda. I didn't care how cheesy he might be, I was keeping the note and Yoda, forever. I stuck both of the things Kris had left me on the side table and then got myself out of bed.

I walked out into the kitchen and opened his fridge. Water, eggs, ketchup, milk, cheese, Capri Suns, a huge T-bone, and an apple--those were the only things in his fridge. I felt my stomach growl. "Yeah, I know you're hungry, but apparently Kris sucks at shopping," I told it. I shut the door then turned around and landed my eyes on an open box of Cookie Crisp sitting on the counter, and Kris' empty bowl and spoon.

I decided not to look any further for food, so I made myself a bowl of Cookie Crisp. I finished in a few minutes then took a look around the kitchen. Does he not know how to do dishes? I shook my head then walked over to the sink. I washed all of the dishes, dried them, then stuck them where they belonged. I wiped off the counters and put away the box of cereal, and it only took me a max of ten minutes.

I heard my phone ring, telling me that Lexa was calling, and I picked it up.

"Hey, what's up?" I said as I walked into Kris' bedroom.

"Are you free later? Like, around three?" she asked me.

"Uh.. What time is it right now?" I asked, searching for a clock.

"Ten eleven," Lex informed me.

"Well.. I have class in an hour. But I'm only there for two, so that means I'll be done at three. I just have to let Kris know, alright?" I told her while I pulled the sheets up to the top of the bed.

"Kay. I was thinking that we could maybe look for dresses. And Ry and I finally decided on a date."

"Whatever you want to do, it's your wedding, Lex. And really? When?" I asked as I grabbed the comforter and stretched it to the top, over the sheets.

"July sixteenth. I'm so excited!"

"That's cool. Do you guys think you're going to have it outside, or inside? It is gonna be kind of hot, ya know.."

"Um, probably outside. I don't know where the actual ceremony would be, but I kind of want the reception to be somewhere that you can be inside and outside. But you would mainly be outside," she said, and I tossed the pillows on the bed.

"I like the way you think. Did you tell Ry about your idea?"

"Sure did."

"And?" I asked.

"He said whatever makes me happy."

"Aw, that boy's too good to be true. You better hang tight to him," I told her

"I will, don't worry."

"Hey, I have to go.. I think I hear Kris."

"Later, babe. Don't forget.. I'll meet you at three at my place."

"I won't. See ya, love ya, bye," I told her then hung up.

"Shane?" he called. "You still 'ere?"

"Yeah, I'm in here," I called, starting to fold my now dry clothes from last night.

I heard him walk into the bedroom. "I missed you," he whispered near my neck, snaking his arms around my waist, hugging me from behind. Little things like that, they were the things that I liked most in a relationship. I didn't need big, extravagant presents. I was equally as happy with my Yoda action figure.

"I missed you, too," I whispered back, turning in his arms so I could kiss him. "Thanks for Yoda," I smiled. "It was sweet."

"No problem. And thank you for cleaning this place up. It look a lot better," Kris told me.

"Anytime. How was practice?"

"Fine," he shrugged. "We worked on the power play most of the time. You 'ave any plan today?"

I frowned a little. "Actually, I do. I have to help Lex pick out a wedding dress."

"It is alright. Some of the guy ask me to 'ang out in a bit, so I will just 'ead over to Flower's place whenever," he told me as he took off his hat and ran his fingers through his hair then stuck it back on.

"Okay. Well, I have to get going, unfortunately. I have class in an hour," I said.

"Aw. An hour?" I nodded my head in response and gathered up my clothes. "Text me later, eh?"

"Promise," I said and started walking towards the door, Kris right behind me.

"Alo'a," he said then leaned in to kiss me.

"Aloha," I replied after I pulled away from his lips. I gave him one last smile then walked out the door. I got to the bottom of the stairs when I realized something. I didn't drive here, and Kris' apartment is on the whole other side of the river from my school. It would take me an hour just to reach the bridge. I turned back around and marched back up the steps. When I reached the top, Kris was standing there, keys in hand.

"Need a ride?" he offered.

"Yeah, that'd be nice," I said with a slight laugh.

We got in his car and sang like usual on our way back to my place so I could pick up my project and book bag.

"You are wearing that?" he laughed. I looked down to take in my appearance. I was wearing his sweats and t-shirt from last night and pair of Nikes.

"Yup. I only had time to grab a hair tie and hoodie. I don't really care if people think I look like a slob, I'm comfy." He only shook his head at me. "I'll wash these," I said and gestured towards his clothes. "And give them back to you eventually."

"Keep them," he smiled.

"You sure?"

"Positive."

"I'll see you later," I told him, then leaned over to give him a quick kiss. Well, I only intended for it to be a quick kiss. Kris decided to deepen it, and we didn't pull away for a minute or so.

We said goodbye a second time then I opened the car door and stepped out into the cold air. I pulled the sleeves of my hoodie over my fingers, then I grabbed my project and bag and shut the car door. I waved to him one last time and turned around to make my way to class. I was not in the mood to be there.

Doesn't it always feel like it takes forever for class to finally end when you don't want to be stuck there at all? It was absolutely miserable. For the majority of the two hours I was there, I doodled all over my notebook and wrote down some lyrics to songs, combining different ones together. And every time I would look at the clock, I swear it would only move two fucking minutes. Eventually, I got out of that place, but it was then that I realized I couldn't meet Lexa at her place. Why? Because I'm an idiot and didn't take my car. I called her and she came and picked me up.

Right now, we were in some dress store that I don't know the name of.

"How about this one?" I asked Alexa.

"Nah, it's too boring."

"This one?" I sighed, showing her another dress. We had been to at least two other stores and she still couldn't find 'the one'. I know it's not just a dress she was looking for, but really, it was starting to get boring.

"Nope."

I groaned. "Can I sit down over there?" I said as a I pointed to a couch. "Because every single one I've asked you about, you've said no to. Clearly I'm not helping at all," I said.

I felt my phone vibrate, and I pulled it out of the front pocket of my old purple Plum soccer hoodie.

You're still coming to my game tonight right?

Maaaaybee. :)

"Yeah, sure," Lexa said.

I dragged myself over to the cool looking couch they had and plopped down on it. I wasn't sitting down for thirty seconds before she let out a squeal. "Shane! I found it, this is the one! I'm sure," she said excitedly.

I hopped up off the couch and came to where she was being mesmerized by the dress.

"It's gorgeous," I said. Just like her ring, it was flashy and detailed. It was this huge strapless champagne colored ball gown that fell to the floor. It had these.. victorian looking black designs down the middle and white ruffles that started at the hip and went to the bottom, wrapping the entire way around. The dress came with champagne colored gloves and shoes that had the same black design that the dress did. It wasn't something I would choose as my wedding dress, but she was going to look like a million bucks. "Try the damn thing on," I told her.

We found the right size and she went into the fitting rooms and put it on. I texted back and forth with Kris in the meantime.

Ha ha. Very funny

I don't even know why you ask anymore. I go to every home game I can you know that.

Well, I was just making sure gosh.

He can really sound like a girl some times, and I don't know whether I should find it funny or scary..

"Well, what do you think?" she asked, as I replied to Kris, telling him I had to go and that I'd see him later.

"I love it," I smiled, then twirled my finger, telling her to spin around. "It's perfect."

"Are you sure it's not too much?"

"Nope," I shook my head. "If you're happy with it, get it."

"Okay!" she said and then got off the stage thing and ran over to give me a hug.

"So, are your bride's maids' dresses going to be black since you have that black stuff on your dress and all?" I called to her in the fitting room.

"Um, I haven't given it much thought, but yeah, probably. Or would that look ugly?"

"No, I think it would look good."

"Really?" she asked, stepping out from behind the curtain with the dress in her hands.

"Mmhm," I nodded.

She bought the dress, it being extremely expensive--but that didn't really matter to Lex--then we walked down the street a little to Panera. I got half a sandwich and potato soup, Lexa got a salad. She eats so much of that, you'd swear she'd get sick of looking at those little green leaves.

We mainly talked about the wedding. She still wasn't sure where she wanted to have it at, but she did decide on the color of the bride's maids' dresses, what color flowers she was going to have, and an idea of some of the food she wanted to have served. Lex also told me that we were getting together some time next week to send out the save the date cards. As we were talking, I couldn't help but wonder what my wedding might be like, or hell, who I was going to marry. We sat in the booth for nearly an hour, talking about her 'big day', until she brought up Kris.

"He left you an action figure? That's lame, Shane," she said and rolled her eyes. These sort of things about Lex, the way she scoffed at little, thoughtful stuff, they could some times bother me. And right now was one of those times.

"I thought it was sort of sweet, different. I'm not a big fan of typical and predictable guys, you know that. Kris, he's not like them."

"Yeah, yeah," she said and ran a hand through her hair. "And not that you've never been happy or anything before, but once you met Kris, you've just.. you haven't changed, you.. He has some sort of effect on you."

"Is that good or bad?"

"It's good, trust me."

"Okay," I laughed, standing up to throw out my trash. I peeled the wrapper off my cookie and split it with Lex as we walked out. "I brought up his best friend, Luc, last night..," I trailed, looking down at the sidewalk.

"And?"

"You know he died a few years ago, right?"

"No," she shook her head. "I had no idea. What'd he say?"

"He didn't say anything at all at first. And as I was apologizing, he stopped me and said that it was alright. Then he started telling me about him, and God, Lex.. I felt so sorry for him. I just.. I can't even imagine it. I don't think I'd be able to make it if I lost you. He sounded like he was about to break down all over again."

"That's so sad.. I don't know what'd I'd do without you, either," she said. "But at least he has you now," she added as we rounded the corner.

"Yeah..," I smiled.

I could feel her looking at me, studying me. "You're in love with him, aren't you?"

"I think I might be," I said quietly.