Your Hand In Mine

- Shane -

So, my project was due in two days, which makes today Tuesday, and still didn't have any idea as to what the hell I wanted to take pictures of.

People--that was the topic. But what about them? Exactly. Seriously, what do you think of when you hear the word 'people?'

Tall. Short. Fat. Skinny. White. Black. Blonde. Brunette. Pretty. Ugly. Personality. Attitude. Age. Name. Gender. Family. Friends. Adults. Kids. Teams. Couples. Professions. The list goes on..

I sighed, picking up my camera and walking out my front door. After locking it, I made my way down the flight of steps and outside, smiling and sending a wave to a few of my neighbors who passed by.

I walked a few blocks, just observing everything around me, hoping to get some inspiration. I watched the trees sway when the wind would pick up, the cars drive past then come to a stop at a light only to move forward again, and people looking left and right before their feet moved them to the other side of the street. I heard the squeals of brakes, the chirps of birds, plastic bags ruffling when they were switched from one hand to the other, tires making that certain 'thump' when they crossed a pothole or bridge, and bells ringing when someone would open the door to a restaurant or store. It all brought a smile to my face. And that was when I found my inspiration, what I was going to take fifty frames of--happiness.

I couldn't take a picture of myself, though, because I wasn't truly happy. And sure, I might not know if these people were completely happy, but I could only hope that the same things that had happened to me weren't happening to them.

I flipped the camera on and adjusted all the settings to the way I wanted them. Then I let the camera fall back against my chest as I walked another block or so before I found the first person I was going to take a picture of.

There was a little girl, probably around the age of six, with sand-colored hair in two messy braids flowing just past her shoulders. She was wearing a dress that was mostly bright blue with light yellow and pink flowers scattered across it. There was a strip of pink fabric with white polka dots all the way around the bottom of the dress and the straps that sat on her shoulders. She had on those white sandals that every little girl once owned, too. In one hand, she held a white ribbon that eventually led up to a pretty, light pink balloon. In the other hand, she gripped her mother's fingers, while her feet splashed around in a stray puddle along the street. Her face held a look of complete bliss. She was probably so happy that if that balloon left her fingers, she would think the world was ending and sit down and cry.

After taking a few pictures of the little girl, I turned my head so I was looking at the stretch of sidewalk in front of me. There was a small bench a few feet up to my left that held a boy and his grandmother. The boy was basically reenacting Star Wars with some action figures. He had Darth Vader and R2D2 fighting Princess Leia and Chewbacca. I didn't think that's how the movie went, but hey, he was like, eight. You were allowed to make shit up and imagine things when you were eight. From what I could see, he wasn't wearing a smile, but rather an intense leave-me-the-fuck-alone-gramma-i'm-blowing-shit-up look. And what was great about that look, was that his grandma didn't bother him, she just left her grandson in his own little world, just the way he liked it. Without taking another step, I held the camera up to my eyes, shut one, and then snapped a picture of the boy.

A minute or so later, I came to an intersection, and instead or going in the same direction, I made a left at the corner. I hadn't taken more than four steps before I found somebody else to photograph. There was woman in her mid-thirties, I guessed, standing in front of a few racks of flowers. She would take a step and then bring her hand up to a bunch of flowers and take in their scent. Then she'd take another step and smell the next bunch. And every time she would bring her nose up to the pedals, a faint grin would appear on her lips as she closed her eyes for a moment. She seemed so content, like nothing could go wrong.

As I was pressing the button that takes the pictures, my phone vibrated in my pocket. I ignored it for second, making sure I got a good picture of the woman.

From: The Wicked Witch of the West
I know what you're thinking

Oh, do you now?

How could she possibly know what I was thinking? She could barely think for herself, let alone the both of us.

Yep. You're out there taking pictures of people with smiles on their faces, people who're having a good time. Funny that the first thing you didn't take a picture of was yourself..

As soon as I read the text, my eyes shot up, and I started spinning in slow circles, looking for my best friend until my phone vibrated again.

You'll never find me ;)

This is creepy, you know that? How long have you been watching me?

Long enough, babe. You know.. you might be able to take a picture of yourself if you went and talked to Kris

I bit my lip as I sat down on the curb before I kept reading.

I know you're not going to be 100% happy because you just lost your brother, and that's understandable, but maybe Kris could help ease the pain. He knows what it feels like, he's been through it before. I just miss seeing you happy and loving life, that's all

When I finished reading the words, I brought the back of my hand to my lips, resting my elbow on my knee as I wiped away stray tears with my other hand. I thought she had barely noticed what I was feeling.. It wasn't like her to care for someone like that, and I was okay with that, I accepted that. I had been her best friend for years, I knew how she worked. And I knew she cared about me, just like I did for her, but she was always so focussed on herself, nobody else. For her to actually notice and try her best to comfort me, even if she did bring up Kris, it said a lot.

Don't cry, babe. Just go talk to him, I promise it'll be okay. You still love him and by the way your face looked when you pulled that note out of your pocket, what those words did to you, it's a safe bet that he still loves you too. You can't get your brother back, but maybe you can get Kris back. Give him his second chance

I sighed, moving my fingers along the buttons, creating a message.

Maybe you're right, Lex. But maybe you're wrong too. What if I go over there and he's the one that's moved on, not me? What if I'm the one stuck loving someone that doesn't want me? What then?

You'll never know if you don't try, Shane. Pick your head up and follow your heart

I didn't reply, I just wiped away the rest of the tears and gave my head a few short nods, knowing she was still watching over me. I slipped my phone back into my pocket, picked myself up from the curb, and got back to my project.

I didn't see anyone for a few minutes that looked even the slightest bit happy; they were all bitching into the small, square piece of technology, also known as a cell phone, or they were walking with their face lowered and eyes on the ground.

I found person number four under a bridge. He looked like he was a bit older than my parents, and his clothes were torn and ratty; he was homeless. The guy was sitting on the concrete sidewalk playing the drums, well, they weren't actually drums. He had two white buckets upside down in between his feet and he kept hitting the buckets with to small sticks, creating a beat. He wasn't all that bad, actually. I was about to walk by him when a lady a few yards ahead of me stopped and tossed a dollar or two into his hat that was laying next to him. His face lit up as he gave her a nod and said, "God Bless." I took a picture of his face while he watched the woman drop a few dollars in his hat, freezing the moment. I would have given him a few dollars, too, but I didn't have any money with me.

Further down, past the bridge, I came across a group of girls. They were linked at the arm, and you could hear their laughter from miles away. They were probably talking about a boy or some inside joke that only they were supposed to get. I thought back to the time I was a teenager, and man, did I miss it. I was always with my friends, Lexa included, just messing around and having a good time. Everything was so simple compared to now, even though it seemed like the world was going to end over the stupidest reasons when I was sixteen. I took a few pictures of the girls as they kept walking.

When I came to another intersection, I took a right instead of a left. There was a small café with a few tables and chairs just outside on the sidewalk. There was a couple occupying one table, their hands resting on the table, fingers laced together. The girl was sipping her iced tea, but then she suddenly took the lemon from the rim of the glass and squeezed it with her thumb and index finger so the juice squirted on the guy's face. I took a picture of the evil, yet victorious smirk on the girl's face.

Then it was the guy's turn to get revenge. He dipped a crouton from his salad into his dressing then tossed at the girl's face. The look that appeared on her face was full of surprise and shock. But the guy's face, he was wearing that same smirk the woman across from him was wearing a few moments ago. That's when I took another picture. And I couldn't help but think that that was something Kris and I would have done. I let a sigh escape my lips.

Seven down, forty-three more to go.

Almost an hour later, I had all fifty frames, well there was actually sixty-one, but I had met the minimum requirement. When I had taken the last photograph, I sat down on the curb again and pressed a few buttons, bringing up all of the pictures I had taken. I looked through them for a few minutes, the smile never leaving my face.

All those people, they seemed to have what I was still searching for and trying to get back--happiness. And in the end, it was more than just a project to me.