Your Hand In Mine

"Have fun on your honeymoon!" I shouted along with everyone else as the two newlyweds waved from their limo. When they were too far away to see anymore, everyone started to slowly drift off to their cars, saying goodbye to the people they knew.

"Hey," I heard Aaron say, trying to sound sexy as he walked up beside me. "Do you want to come back to my place?"

I stopped walking and turned to look at him. "No," I told him then began walking again, my extremely high heels that Lex picked out clicking against the pavement.

He stood there for a moment, a bit shocked that I was still continuing to turn him down before he quickly caught up to me. "Can I at least drive you home?"

"Don't you get it? I don't like you," I enunciated. "I already told you that I'm in love with somebody else and to fuck off. Does it turn you on when a girl says that? Because if that's the case, sure, you can't take me home. Will that get you to stop bothering me?" I scoffed, walking away from him for the third time in less than sixty seconds.

He grabbed my arm, nearly clothes-lining me to the point where I almost fell. I caught my balance, ripping my arm from his grasp. "It's pretty obvious that I'm walking towards my own car to drive me, myself and I home, is it not? So what's your deal? Why are you always following me?"

"I, uh.. You don't remember me, do you?"

I just looked at him. I hadn't ever really met any of Ryan's friends or even his family for that matter, so no, I didn't really know who the hell this guy was. He looked like any other guy you would pass on the streets.

"I ran into you and your smoothie went all over your shirt?" he hinted. My eyes went wide, realizing that it was in fact Mr. Smoothie.

"And then I told you that I liked girls," I remembered.

"Yeah.."

"So if I told you that I liked girls, why are you, a guy, trying to take me home?" I asked.

"Well, I hung out with Ryan later that night, and I mentioned that I spilled a drink all over this really pretty girl..," he smiled, and to my surprise, I didn't blush. "And then he said something about Alexa saying that said girl had told her about the whole smoothie incident and Alexa had told Ryan. Then I asked if you really liked chicks, and all he did was laugh, saying that that's something you would have said. But then Ry told me that you just broke up with a hockey player and life just sort of sucked for you," he shrugged. "Back in there, though," Aaron said, jerking his thumb at the building we had all just left. "You told me you still love him, but I could tell that he wasn't here or you would have at least waved to him or something.. So, I figured that you'd give in and forget about him, and I don't know.. maybe then we could go on a date or something?" he said, hopefully. There was my chance. I could finally move on from Kris and be done with him for good.

"You're such an asshole," I semi-yelled at him, chuckling a bit. "Sure you might have seemed sweet at Panera, even if you did spill my drink all over me, but you didn't tell me who you were when you knew exactly who I was. Then you try to take advantage of me because my life took a shitty turn and I'm more vulnerable than the rest?" I said. "And I'll always love him, not you," I whispered as I shook my head. "Leave me the fuck alone." With that, I picked up my feet and got in my car, leaving him there to stand there, speechless.

I didn't want to move on from Kris and be done with him for good. I wanted the exact opposite of that.

~!@#$%^&*()_+

"Hello, Jane," I greeted my goldfish as I walked through my front door, my black heels and everything else I took to Lex's wedding in my hands. I tossed it all on the coffee table and grabbed the fish food.

"Did your day suck as much as mine did?" I asked her even though I knew I wouldn't get a response. I spun off the lid and tapped some food into the bowl. She just gulped the water. "I thought so. But hey, maybe tomorrow will be great. Maybe not for you, though, seeing as Tarzan's across the river.. But I could have one a hell of a day."

As soon as I mentioned Tarzan being across the river at Kris' apartment, I frowned, thinking back to when the idea of getting a pet fish was brought up.. That night we went grocery shopping at Giant Eagle, and I pushed him around the entire store. That night Kris asked--out of nowhere, might I add--if I wanted to get a fish with him. That night I was told that I couldn't name my fish Doug because that was already Alex Goligoski's fish's name. And that night, Kris told me that he loved me. And I had told him that I loved him, too.

It was probably one of the happiest days of my life. Even if that sounds really lame and pathetic, it was the truth. Nothing really happened in my life, at least nothing exciting. So to hear someone who isn't a parent say that they love you, and to feel the same way about them.. it was incredible.

I sighed, walking over to the coffee table and clearing everything off of it. Then I grabbed the bowl that Jane was in and set it in the middle of the table before making my way into my bedroom, leaving Jane there to suck down some more water and swim in circles.

I unzipped my dress, kicking it aside as it fell to the floor. I pulled open a few drawers and grabbed a pair of his sweatpants and one of his shirts that he let me keep. I put them on then stood in front of the mirror. I was.. comfortable.. and warm. It felt like home, somewhere where I belonged. They still smelled like him, too. He probably wouldn't ever get them back.

When I stopped staring at the Penguins logo in the center of his black shirt, I started pulling out all of the bobby pins in my hair along with the white flower then let them fall onto my dresser. I didn't need to bother with removing my make up, I had already cried it off. With one last glance at the girl in the mirror, I turned away.

I searched high and low all around my apartment until I found what I was looking for. When I found everything, I set it all on my coffee table, right next to Jane. I flopped down on the couch and just looked at all the stuff he had given me, save for Jane. But still, he even had the other half that.

To the girl who put a smile on my face,
Sorry that I wasn't there when you woke up. We had an early
practice and I forget to tell you. Be here when I get back?
-The boy who is lucky to have a girl like you in his life

P.S. I would have left you a flower, but it is the middle of winter
and I don't have a garden. So I left you a Star Wars action
figure that I got from my cereal this morning instead. May the force be
with you.

When I had read over the note, I picked up Yoda and smiled. He was such a geek. I didn't know of any guy that picked up an action figure from a box of cereal and though that it was good enough to replace a flower. I laughed, at least he was original. Nobody had ever given me my own little Yoda.

Jorge was the next thing I had grabbed. Kris hit the balloon on his first try, automatically winning me the fluffy pink flamingo. There were polar bears, and turtles, and lions.. But of all the things up there, he had to get me a flamingo. In the end, though, it didn't really matter to me which animal he picked out. The fact that he won it for me was beyond sweet. He was such a gentleman. He even let me name it.

I told you I would alway be here for you.

If only I would have believed that earlier and gone to him. Shaking my head, I let the slip of paper fall to the table.

Sporks. Of all the things to choose from, they were by far my favorite birthday present last year. Not only did he plan my little surprise party, keeping in mind that I was a little kid at heart, he listened and remembered to the things I said. Hell, I didn't even remember talking about sporks. That whole topic probably lasted all but thirty seconds, yet he took note of it and went through all the trouble of finding them for me. He really was different from the rest of them.. I had the proof.

And then there was the other half of my birthday. The half where he asked me to be his girlfriend and we threw pancake batter at each other. So, not only did I get the best birthday present ever, I got the most amazing guy, too.

I didn't have the most amazing guy anymore, though.

But what I had told Aaron earlier that night, it was still true. I was in love with somebody else; I was in love with Kristopher Letang.