Into the Void

Night time is the best time to take pictures, because the dark shows the true qualities of objects and people. A flower that might look like any other in the daylight, but the colors brighten and they all look the same. Yet at night the moon flaws everything, darkening the shades to something very different. Even new. The night time proves that the world wasn't perfect. It makes the true side of human nature come out- humans are all monsters, running around in dark clothes, stealing what they didn't have and being who they really are.

Night was also my favorite time because of the moon. Every night I know that the moon would show up. It changes through cycles, just like humans, who were sometimes happy, and sometimes sad. Unlike the sun, the moon brought out the reality in the world.

My finger slips over the familiar button and freezes the scene forever in a picture. A simple click, flash, and everything is perfect. It is a modern version of the old instant film from Polaroid. The film slips out and I wave it around, waiting for my picture. My eyes slip away from the exposing photo towards my wall. For years I have been posting up nightly pictures of the moon. One for each day, I could hardly see the pink paint under them. Chipped and outdated as it was, I will always refuse to paint over it-my mother had worked for hours to make her little princess a pink room.

The photo was just as perfect as if I were looking out the window. Taking a thumb tack from the tray, I tack it up next to last night’s. Scribbling down the date I now realize what today is. My heart stops for a second and I felt a rush of anxiety. A cool rush of air surrounds me; I knew better then thinking it was from my open window. The hairs on my neck stand up, but still I didn’t turn around to him. His presence was enough to restart my heart and make the tightness ease up. Before he could blink I spin around, taking a picture immediately. Stefan covers his light glass eyes from the flash.

“I better not have come out clearly, love.” He warns me, but follows to my side as I held the photo under a lamp. His pictures were so much harder to see. Stefan grins as his figure was blurred and look more translucent than solid. My lip stuck out, but it was one of his better pictures. Usually he is just a mist. I wrote his name and took out the hollow book from my book case, which was where I kept all my other pictures.

By 'other pictures' I mean my pictures of the dead, my friends. It was a curse set upon me exactly five years ago today. Stefan tells me it’s a gift, but I don’t believe him. The photo fell into a stack of others. Most of them were of him, while the others were just random pictures I took during the night of flowers, people and my best friend.

Stefan sits down on my bed; the mattress gives a small squeak in reply. That is one of the many things I wonder about him. He would physically move and touch inanimate objects. But once that thing breathes, including plants and animals he goes right through them. Like they aren’t even there. It annoys the hell out of me.

His clear green eyes stared at me with child-like innocence. “What?” He asked still staring. I shake my head and return the fake book to the shelf. “You’re acting weird tonight. What’s wrong?”

My lungs fill up with air as I took a deep breath. It almost burned, like it did so many years ago. “I didn’t honestly expect you to remember what today was. It’s the five year anniversary of the crash. The night you found me,” Tears threaten to fall. “I could have been at the bottom of Galveston Bay, with my mother.”

Stefan stands up; his arms were straining from reaching out. The pain was clear in his eyes of the wishes he had. His fingers twitch as he forces himself to sit back down. A silent battle raged. I back hand my tears and look away.

“I did remember,” he mumbles. “I was hoping you didn’t.” He appeares at my side, looking directly down into my eyes. If anyone saw him, or even this he would have been locked up for years to come. Stefan was around twenty when he was killed. Or died; he never told me how he died. I was twelve when he found me that night; not even a teenager yet.

My lips peck were his cheek was and my feet lift to their toes just to reach. It was like pecking night air. Even though he looked so solid, so real, he was never solid in touch. Stefan touches his cheek and smiles. I touch the camera, the cool metal was comforting. “Would you like to go visit mom with me? I would love to take a few pictures.”

He stiffens, looking around the room strangely, only to smile. “I would love too. Just don’t you talk to me. The neighbors already think you’re crazy. I rather not hang around a nut house until you are free." Stefan chuckles to himself.

I want to push him. “Everyone thinks I’m crazy anyway. It’s better then when we used to play tag.”

Stefan laughs. “I remember that. It was fun while it lasted. Life, well your life, had special moments like that.”

“It does. Now come on lazy butt, let’s get this freak show on the road.” I skip towards the door, Stefan mumbling, “Ha-ha”. He follows behind, not letting much distance between us.

The dead were lined up outside. Some were recent, so I smiled toward them. “I’ll help you tomorrow.” I promise before I leave them. Most of these people don’t speak unless I ask them too. Helping them was something I enjoy. As much as I hate this ‘gift’, I still help. I owed that much to them. It still scared me everyday, but luckily I always had Stefan at my side. I looked to my side at him. He was toying with his dark brown hair, pushing it behind his ears, then back around his face.

He looks down at me and grins. “Time to play hide from the ape,” he places his finger to his lips and gets down on his knees. I copy; it was a game we used to play everyday. We would sneak out to go play in the neighbor’s garden. The ape of course was my step father. A 6’5, hairy, 330 pound man-monkey who smelled like ass. Arthur is laid out on the couch, snoring so loud I’m surprised animal control hasn’t barged in yet.

I crawl with him, holding back the giggle that wants to erupt from me. We were found out half way through the front door. Stefan urges me to run, my skirt flowing behind me like black silk. His legs evaporate, leaving him just hovering above the ground. A shiver runs down my spine; another reminder on just how alone I was in the living world.

Pushing the feeling away I continue up the block.