Dreams Don't Always Have To Exist While The Sun's Down And Your Eyes Are Shut

"so what are we doing today?" he questioned.
"i don't know, whats there to do around this place?" i questioned him, Alex was the only person i planned on talking to while here, i didn't plan on talking to his friends because i didn't want to get too settled or attached because i didn't plan on staying, i would get out of here one way or another as soon as i could.
"wanna go get some lunch?" he asked, i suddenly came nervous i haven't eaten since we arrived in America, and i don't feel the need to.
"actually, i have an idea" i stated changing the subject "wheres the school uniform shop?" i questioned knowing that if he didn't come with me my mum would end up dragging me along to get my uniform for St. Timothy's All Girls School and i was no way in hell going anywhere with 'that', Alex gave me a strange look as if he was asking 'uh were supposed to be hanging out and you want to go get a school uniform?' "Its fine Alex, if you don't wanna go there we wont, i was just wondering because i don't want to have to go there with mum" i said "no don't worry about it I'll come with you" he smiled.
"ugh come on Alex we need the uniform for St. Timothy's not your school, i don't need my parents hating me more, as much as i don't care and as much as i hate them its actually really annoying" i stated while Alex was joking around trying to get me to try on a uniform to his school instead of the school i was going to, i was pissed that my parents are making me go to an all girls school, but i wouldn't be there for long, i was going to make certain of that!
The uniform for my school was hideous and Alex thought it was hilarious, he had insisted that we go to lunch and that he pay, i kept trying to change the subject but damn Alex wouldn't budge, i didn't want to eat its not because i think I'm fat, i know I'm not, its kind of like me punishing myself for letting my parents drag me here, or me punishing my parents, either way i refused to eat we arrived at the Cafe, i told Alex i wasn't hungry and that i had, had a big breakfast but Alex insisted that i eat, i ended up ordering a small green salad and a water, Alex gave me a weird stare as if to say 'why are you eating so little and so healthy' but i just pretended i hadn't noticed it.
Alex decided to take this time to get to know me and ask me questions about what went down at the studio, for me this is such an awkward subject because i cant stand talking about sex, it makes everything so awkward and its just like 'will you shut up', but this i didn't feel i could ignore Alex was really curious and i had actually dragged him into it by saying that stuff to my father about sleeping with him, i actually felt bad for that because if dad found out we were hanging out dad would hate him and think we were sleeping together, my bad!
"So what exactly went down back there?" he asked, "what do ya mean?", "i mean what was up with your father kicking you out of the room just because there were guys in here and then believing you when you said you were going to fuck me, it was a bit odd" he stated, i sighed i knew i was going to have to explain everything to him from the beginning but i really didn't want to.