In Love With a Bad Boy? Not Possible Especially When Love Doesn't Exist for Me

Chapter 14

Over the next few days Jayden and I have become closer and became friends. I think the fact that we each trusted the other person with our pasts made us have a better understanding of the other. Jayden knew about my running away when my family died and he didn’t judge me for it and that alone made us closer in person. Anyone who doesn’t judge me based on my past decisions is good in my book. Surprisingly I also got closer to Trent and Demitri as well, they may not know my past but they told me that they really didn’t care; if Jayden accepted me without question then so do they.
It was weird the more I was around Jayden the more strange foreign feelings developed in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t exactly comprehend what they meant at the moment but I found I didn’t care that much at this particular time. Mainly because I was concentrating more on forgetting my past that has come back to haunt me and trying to figure out how to get my enemies off of my back.

It had been a week since I told Jayden my past and a week since my last confrontation with Shelby. They haven’t bothered me which I found strangely odd and made me keep my guard up whenever I was anywhere near them in school. At lunch times I sat with Jayden, Demitri and Trent which wasn’t as bad as I first thought it would be. The longer I hung around the three the more I learned about them and the more I grew used to the idea of us being friends or the “outcast group” as Jayden liked to call us.
I had gotten my bike fixed thanks to Andrew who apart from being a bar keeper he was also a mechanic who had offered to fix my bike for free, but for payment I had to work extra shifts for the week but I didn’t mind.
Anyway the next day I had school I rode my bike over all the while I had a weird feeling in my gut which I couldn’t explain. I didn’t think too much of it as I parked my bike next to Jayden’s bike. Jayden was waiting for me by his bike as he had been doing for the past few days.
The day went on as per normal, except the weird feeling in my gut intensified tenfold as the day went on. I didn’t know what the feeling was but something told me that it was bad. After my last class had ended I soon found out the reasoning behind the feelings.
I walked out with Jayden by my side as usual, but as I got into the hallway I froze at the sight before me. Everyone was staring at me with amusement, horror, shock or remorse expressions on their faces. The reasoning behind those expressions was that pasted on every locker were pictures of me. But not just any pictures, the same pictures taken the night Shayne raped me. What was worse was that Jayden now knew the truth of the horror of my past, and this was all thanks to Shelby and Tyson who were at the end of the hallway smirking at me with laughter in their eyes.
I couldn’t believe that they would stoop this low as to reveal to the entire school of what happened to me. I was literally frozen to the spot as memories of that night ran through my mind along with images of the looks on everyone’s faces now. My worst nightmare had come true and there wasn’t a thing I could do to stop it.
Flashbacks of that night ran through my brain.
“I’m giving you something I want to make you feel all better and forget about your pathetic mother”.
One moment I was holding my cheek in pain and Shayne was sitting on the lounge breathing hard, the next he was on top of me straddling my hips holding my legs in place with his hands holding mine above my head.
Looking into my terrified eyes he whispered “It’s my birthday so give me what I deserve”.
He ripped my clothes off my body and every time I thrashed or struggled he slapped me and beat me till I had bruises everywhere. I had huge hand prints on my hips and thighs from where he held me open forcefully while he invaded and took my innocence.
I will never forget the satisfied look on his face when he stared at me throughout the whole thing. The smugness of him was showing strength to the weak, the look of getting exactly what he wanted, and the look on his face when he finally let me go and left. The look was one saying ‘that he expected no less from a pathetic girl like me’.
Knowing he had that power over me that night ruined me completely, I tried all I that I could to get that power back but due to the humiliation of the whole school finding out about the rape just ruined all of my hard work. I felt vulnerable and exposed even more now than I ever did that night.
“Colby?” Jayden’s voice brought me out of my frozen state. Blinking I did the only thing I could do at that time, I ran. I ran from Jayden’s frantic calls after me. I ran from the humiliation coming from everyone. I ran from the memories terrorising my mind. I ran from everything with no intentions of looking back.
I ran through the school doors and to my bike where I hopped on and stormed down the road without a look back.

End chpt 14