Everything Leaves A Mark

I'm strong. I'm alone. I'm average, and lastly I'm lonely. I grew up only being able to trust myself. My dad left. My mom has a child like innocence and has extreme trust in people's better side and my brother trusts my mom completely. They both dream big. I dream about being able to make the rent payments. I dream about someday being happy, but I don't have time for dreams. I work and I go to school. I am the girl that I can hear all the boys whispering about, but I don't hear what they say about me. I hear my name and I keep walking. This time I can ignore the whispers easier simply because I don't know any of them, nor do I intend to.

We had just moved from Natick, MA to the lovely small town of Carlisle, Pennsylvania because my mom decided that when her latest boyfriend dumped her that it was time for a new start. She didn't normally do this, it was just that she was known all over town for being dumped in such a rude way and for once, my mom was done. We were done with being stepped on when a better thing came along. We were done.

I didn't really care about anything except making the phone bill payment that day. Some kid saw me and then purposefully bumped into me, sending our book all over the hall. I sent a sharp glance his way and hurried after my books, but the boy already had them all in his hand, forsaking his own books.

"I believe that these are yours," he stated as if I was supposed to fall in love with him.

"Nice fact Sherlock. Give me them now and we can forget this," my words were sharp, and this rattled him.

"Now, that's no way to treat someone who just helped you," his pride sounding hurt.

"No, but it is how you treat someone who knocked into you in purpose and is trying to pull a Prince Charming act to win some poor girl's heart." He was speechless and so I grabbed my books and walked away a little haughtily.

"You know, he deserved that," I gasped, this one had caught me off guard. He noticed this fact and smirked, extending his hand. "I'm Danny. Maybe I'll see you around." That's it. Our first encounter. Simple, direct and for some reason it knocked the breath out of me. I can't believe myself. Getting caught up over a boy. I have more important things to think about, like how I'm going to find a job in this new town. Yes, that's what I'll think about. How to get a job, not a boy.

As I walked through all my classes I felt one emotion radiated toward me: curiosity. Plain and simple. I felt no hate or love. No admiration or the feeling of being bullied, just curiosity. I won't have minded if it weren't for the fact that curiosity caused interest in me, and I just can't bring myself to care about any of these rich spoiled kids who get everything they want. I have nothing against fate, I just don't like the tantrums that the spoiled kids throw when they don't get their way. It's rather tiresome.

Anyway, those rich kids I was talking about, they are everywhere, and they all want to know everything about me. They want to be the new kid's best friend for the status of being the "nice kid who got through to the new kid". If you think I'm kidding, think again. Oh! You want an example. Well, I won't deny you wish.

"Hey there! I'm Lauren! Who are you? Oh, I know, do you want to come over on Friday afternoon and we can get to know each other?"

"No thanks. I'm busy," I said in a flat tone.

"With who?" her voice had an under current of jealousy most would have missed.

"None of your business," I replied quite rudely. After this she strutted off to her friends and I saw her hand over a twenty dollar bill in a quick flash before she strutted away with her posse. Well, I've been hated, loved but never bet on. How refreshing I thought sarcastically before I turned away in disgust. Who bets on friendship. Well, obviously these people.

As I walked home I got a few wolf-whistles, but I just pushed on through it. If anyone of them lay ed a hand on me they would regret it. When I was younger I enrolled in a self defense class and I rocked at it. I beat the instructor at once, but that was before I became the responsible one in the family. When money had no real value in my mind. Anyway, as I flashed these morons a glare they shut right up, and I continued on my way, thinking about how monotonous it would be here. Stereotypical kids in a cookie-cutter community. Talk about boring.

I was right. It's boring here. I can't wait to graduate this place. Although, knowing me I will probably just take out a student loan and go to the collage around here, Dickinson I think it's called. And knowing me, I will forsake all of my happiness so that dear brother can have the life I never did. Why do I have to be so nice all the time? The only time I forgot why I hate karma and whatever I did to her is when I catch the occasional glimpse of Danny. Stalkerish I know, but I really don't care. Life will go on with or without my stalkerishness. Now is one of those times.

"You know, you should really be more careful." He caught me off guard again. Yes folks, we are talking about Danny.

"About what?" I raised my eyebrows with what I hoped was a calm and care free face on.

"Watching where you're going. All those guys would love if you bumped into them." Please let me not be blushing.

"Psh. Your just saying that," I retorted not-so-tactfully.

"Oh really? Well, watch that guy," he pointed out a guy in a polo shirt. "Wait for it. There, his eyes snapped toward you and then, yup right there. The classic away and back." My face screwed up in a questioning look. Danny sighed before explaining it. "Guy's classic look is to look at a girl, look away and then look back because they're so beautiful. Not that bad kind of hot, but that beautiful girl-you-want-to-take-to-prom-and-marry. They have all been doing." Then I smiled.

"You just called me beautiful." Danny blushed.

"Well, you are. Don't look at me like that. I'm just here for any guidance you might need. You know high school is really hard. It's like piranhas. They're just waiting for you to breakface. I thought 'hey, why not offer help'." By this point he was blushing even redder. I just giggled.

"Well since you put it that way, I guess I can't refuse," I said, half laughing. I stuck out my hand and we both shook hands and with a smile over my shoulder, we both walked away.

It's been many a month since Danny offered to look out for me, and I really loved him for that. He was so kind to me, but not so much to those who weren't so nice to me. I would know. I saw the dark looks that he gave the wolf-whistlers and the boys who so much as had a dirty thought about me. Not to sound love struck, but... I was. He was just so amazing and nice and best of all, he was a gentleman. A gentleman is hard to find, but apparently not impossible. He could even play guitar, guitar. Who doesn't like the cool guy that can play guitar?

"Hey Jess," Danny greeted me at lunch. I smiled up at him.

"Hey Danny. How was English?"

"Boring. Plain and simple. Hey, do you want to come see my gig at the Gingerbread Man tonight?" Shock danced across my face.

"I didn't know that you were trying to get gig's."

"Not try particularly hard," he said in a round about type voice. "The owner heard me playing on the street for fun, and offered some money of I played for a half hour. I accepted, and I want your opinion on my proformance. Please!" He said the lastpart in a whiney type voice. I laughed and nodded my head.

"Sure thing Danny. What time?" Danny let out the breath he had evidently been holding and grinned widly at me.

"7, sharp." I grinned wide and promised to be there before I headed off to my classes.

Danny's show was amazing! I never knew he had such a beautiful voice. I just about died every time he shot me that stunning smile of his. All of these emotions were over whelming me. I had never even considered another guy before, I just put my head down and went through life, but Danny made me want to feel those butterflies he inspired. A totally new feelling. And yet, a feeling I loved.

"Hey guys, I have to go, but I have one last song. It's called Assassin, and it's originally by John Mayer, and here it goes.

I work in the dead of night
When the world's quiet, no one is around
Track my moves, racing the yellow lights
To find the gate is open, she's waiting in the room
I just step on through

You get in, you get done and then you get gone
You never leave a trace, or show your face, you get gone
Should've turned around and left before the sun came up again
But the sun came up again

Enter the morning light
To find the day is burning the curtains and the wine
In a little white room
Though I'm not alone, her head is heavy on me
She's sleeping like a child
What could I do

You get in, you get done and then you get gone
You never leave a trace, or show your face, you get gone
Should've turned around and left before the sun came up again
But the sun came up again

I was a killer, was the best they'd ever seen
I'd steal your heart before you ever heard a thing
I'm an assassin and I had a job to do
Little did I know that girl was an assassin too

Suddenly I'm in over my head and I can hardly breathe
Suddenly I'm floating over her bed and I feel everything
Suddenly I know exactly what I did, but I can not move a thing
And suddenly I know exactly what I've done
And what it's gonna mean to me, mean to me

I'm gone

I was a killer, was the best they'd ever seen
I'd steal your heart before you ever heard a thing
I'm an assassin and I had a job to do
Little did I know that girl was an assassin too

She's an assassin
She's an assassin
She's an assassin
She's an assassin and she had a job to do
That folks is one of my favoite songs. Thanks for listening. Goodnight," and with that Danny slipped off the stage. I rushed back stage to see Danny putting his guitar into his case, concintration creasing his forehead.

"Danny! Great job," I said, excitment coloring my voice, as I jumped into his arms. Danny caught me, and spun me around. As we parted, I gave Danny a quick kiss on the cheek and Danny's color rose.

"What was that for?"

"For an awesome show."

"That's all?" Danny inquired with a coy smile.

"Well, maybe for being over all awesome."

"Oh really, well if you think I'm over all awesome then you won't mind if I do this," and then his lips were on mine, and then they weren't. I opened my eyes to see Danny scratching his head. "Sorry, I just-" and then I kissed him. It was beautiful and so incredably perfect. When we parted his was breathless. "I've wanted to do that for so long now. Jess, will you be my girlfriend?" I nodded vigourusly. "Good, because you're the best thing that's ever happened to me." I laughed that nice type of laugh and Danny joined with his beautiful smile evident on his face.

Six Months Later

I was sobbing on my bed room floor. I knew it. You get attached, you get hurt. I was moving. Mom didn't feel the love here so we were moving, and I hated it. I hated her stupd boyfriend too or breaking her heart.

When I walked into school Danny saw my tears and demanded to know what was wrong.

"We're moving. Mom doesn't like her boyfriend." Danny understood and just held me as everyone walked past us, pausing only to cast concerned looks over thier shoulders. And so I cried and cried. And for the next couple weeks I fell into a depresion, no one could help me out of. My mom finally understood that I had reached my breaking point, liferally, and yet she didn't think possibly it was time for dear ol' Jess to be put first. Of course not. But comparitivly speaking, that was nothing to the heartbreak to come.

"Jess, you're gunna break up with that boy." My mouth went slack as I gasped at her. How could she!

"Why in the dickens would I do that?" I asked with outrage and anger mixing together.

"Becuase he's no good for you," I immeditly defended the one boy to ever truly see the real me, of course.

"Like you would know. I'm just income for you. I support over half my wieght!"

"Oh honey, just think of it this way, you can find some one else," I scoffed. I wasn't in love with Danny yet, but I felt a strong pull toward him and fireworks with thier own accomping sparks were there, and the more time I spend with him the stronger these feelings grow.

"Please," I scoffed.

"Honey, he'll move on," myy mom said in a voice so cold my heart believed her, and it broke into tiny pieces. Then I relized how right my mom was. So the next day after lunch I set out to meet him, and tell him the word I hated to even hear myself say.

"Danny, I love you, but I think it's t-time we g-go our se-se-seperate w-ways," I said half stuttering, my mouth not wanting to say the words that would break me, tears trickling out of my eyes.

"What! Jess, I-I love you," the last part came as a whisper and my tears doubled till they were running down my face thick and fast.

"B-but you'll m-m-move o-on and I-I'll be l-l-left behind. I bet I won't even l-l-leave a m-m-mark. And th-th-this way you c-c-can be famous and n-not worry about y-your stupid o-old girl friend." At this Danny took my face in his hands and looked my straight in the yes.

"Jess, I can't ever forget you. I won't. You are amazing and bright and dfinatly not stupid. I will wait for you until we can be together again and you can hold me to that. If you don't want to wait, ok, but I will." I was full out sobbing and I could see a fewtears making thier down Danny's face too, and I just sat with him, just loving being togethr, until it was dark out and I had to go home to get packed.

Waking up the next morining was terrible. I felt alone, and unloved. I packed all morning, not even pausing for lunch.

"Jess! You need to eat!" Mom yelled up the stairs.

"No way! I feel sick!" I yelled back with a fake cough added on for convincing. And so I stayed in my room all night, till I went out to meet Danny for a last goodbye.

When I got to out meeting place I parked my car and went to wait by the agreeded upon, old tree.

"Danny, what took so long! I missed you!" and I ran straight into his arms. Danny grinned at me and we enjoyed each other's company as we chatted about everything trying to forget tomorrow. When the night ended Danny walked me to the car. When I started the car I saw a note on my windshield that brought tears to my eyes, it was that adorable. It read "Everything Leaves A Mark". I got out and flipped it over and it had Danny's address and phone number. As I drove away, I looked over at Danny, maybe for the last time.