Sweet Child of Mine

The next couple of weeks were hell, every time Amy came over I felt guilty about taking away her time with Erin. Then when I'd talk to Erin about it she'd say that she wanted life to continue as normal for as long as it could.

One afternoon Adie and I were working on some stuff for Adeline when my cell phone rang.
"Hello."
"Billie Joe?" Someone asked desperately.
"Yeah, who's this?"
"It's Keith."
"Hey Keith, is everything alright?"
"No, Erin took a turn for the worse." He says, I could tell he was crying.
"How bad?"
"She . . . . She fell unconscious, I rushed her to hospital."
"Jeez." I say as I close the door to the office, realizing I was getting attention from passing by interns.
"The doctor says she won't last long, I was wondering if you could get Amy from school and bring her here."
"Of course, what hospital."
"Oakland General." Keith says nervously.
"Alright, I'm leaving now." I say as I grab my jacket. I make my way down the hallway with quick pace but I'm stopped by Adie.

"Where are you going?"
"Erin is in the hospital, I'm going to pick up Amy from school and take her to see her mom."
"She's going to die." Adie manages to stutter out. I just nod. "I'm coming with you.

Adie had no resentment towards Erin, so it wasn't like she wanted Erin to die. She was as worried as I was. I'm not sure if we were more worried for Erin or Amanda. In the car Adie pulled out her cell phone and called the school, she had the number on her cell phone because it was the same number for Joey's school. She explains the situation and hangs up.
"She should be waiting up front for us." Adie says as she puts her phone back in her purse.

We pull up to the school and Amanda runs towards us and slides into the back seat.
"What's going on?!" she demands as tears build up in her eyes, "Don't you dare lie to me Dad."
"Oh fuck." I mumble under my breath.
"Tell me!" she says angrily, "I'm sick of this, I known something has been going on for a month and a half. Now tell me."
"I wish I could." I say as tears build up in my eyes.
"Then you tell me Adie!" Adie just shakes her head and puts her hand on mine.
"Your mom has gotten worse, much worse." I say slowly, Amanda just looks at me stunned for a moment.
"Is she d-dying?"
"She made me promise not to tell you, so you wouldn't worry." I say distraught. I look in the rear view mirror and see her put her hands over her face. The sound of sobbing fills the car. We pull into the hospital parking lot and I look into the back seat. Amanda looks up at me slowly, mascara bleeding down her face.
"I think I'll need a Kleenex." She says trying to stop the tears.
"Here kid." Adie says as she passes her a tissue.
"Thanks." Amy says as she wipes up her face.

We walk into the hospital up to Erin's room. I give Amanda a hug before we enter the room.
"Mom." Amanda says slowly.
"Amy, I'm so sorry." Erin says from the bed.
"Mom, it's okay." She says as she rushes to the bed.
"I need to tell you a few things before I go."
"Mom, don't talk like that, you're not going anywhere." Amy says bursting into tears. I see Keith sitting in a chair, totally distraught.
"I don't have much time left, we both know that." Erin says calmly, "Firstly, I left you in your Dad's care . . . ."

I can't stand to watch this anymore so Adie and I head into the waiting room.
"This isn't fair for Amy." I say as I sit on a chair. Adie sits next to me and puts her arm around me. "I lost my dad when I was just a kid, this can't happen to her, I don't want her to go through the same thing."
"I know." Adie whispers. "You're okay, and as time passes so will she."
"Adie," I say desperately lacking words, "Losing someone is the worst pain you can feel." We sit there for a while in silence.

"I have to pick the boys up from school, do you want me to come here after I take them home?"
"No, I'll be okay." I say calming down, "Explain to the boys what's happening so they won't say anything . . . ."
"Okay." She says as she kisses my lips before leaving me in the waiting room.

Amanda comes into the waiting room with teary eyes.
"Hey kid-o." I say as I go up to hug her.
"Mom wants to talk to you." she says softly.
"O-okay." We walk into the hospital room.
"Billie Joe, you're a good guy." Erin says with much effort. "You always have been, and I'm sorry I never told you about Amanda."
"Erin, you already . . ."
"Will you forgive me?"
"Yeah of course."
"Thank you." she said more relaxed. I realized what was going on, she was clearing her conscience. I back up against the wall, letting Erin, Amanda and Keith talk amongst each other. We stayed there late into the night, until Erin went flat line.

When the sound of the machine turned to one long beep Keith went into a state of rage and started pounding at the wall and Amy burst out crying. I went up to Amy to try to calm her and she just pounded her hands against my chest in aggravation, I didn't stop her.
"I know what you're going through." I say as I calm her down and hug her.
"No, no, no." she mumbles in to my shirt between sobs.
"My dad died when I was just a kid too." Her sobs lightened.
"It's not fair." She cries.
"I know."
"It's not fair!" she repeats.
"Please, take her out of here." Keith says crying.
"Come on." I say as I lead Amy out of the room.
"Goodbye Mom." I hear her whisper.

I call Adie on my cell phone and ask her to pick us up. While we waited we went to the cafeteria to get some coffee.
"How old were you when your dad died?"
"Ten."
"Oh." She says wiping her eyes. "Does it still hurt?"
"Sometimes, every time I sing Wake Me Up When September Ends."
"Then why do you sing it?"
"It's therapeutic; I feel that I should face the facts." I say as we walk out of the cafeteria towards the entrance where Adie's going to pick us up, "But facing the facts isn't for everyone, I never thought I'd be able to face it."
"Okay." She says as she looks out into the night, "It took you twenty years."
"Jeez you make me feel so old." I say receiving a tearful smile from her. "There's Adie."

We get into the car silently, not a word is said till we reach the house. Amy naturally heads straight to her room.
"So, Erin is . . ."
"Yeah." I say quietly, "Keith is distraught."
"I'm sure." Adie says quietly as we go into the kitchen for yet another coffee, I was seriously starting to feel like Mike, "I talked to the boys. I told them not to talk about Amy's mother until she said she wanted to talk."
"Alright."
"Billie, are you okay?"
"It's Amy, I couldn't stand seeing her like that." I say as I start to tear up, "It was like a flash back of me." she didn't say anything she just stared at me for a while.
"So you'll be the perfect person to help her through it. Last thing you want is her drowning the pain with drugs or something."
"You're right." I say looking into her eyes, her beautiful, entrancing eyes.