Sweet Child of Mine

The next morning the boys left for school, but Amy stayed home. I went down to my music studio to bet Bluey 2 and brought it up to her room. I knocked on the door.
"Amy." I said loudly.
"Come in." a muffled voice said. I open the door and walk over to her bed where she's lying.
"Music always takes away the pain."
"Thanks." She said taking the guitar from me and sitting like an Indian on her bed with Bluey 2 on her lap.
"Write songs, play existing songs, do whatever you like." I say as I'm about to leave to room.
"Thank you." she said as she got up to plug the guitar into her amp. As I walked away from the room she started playing Wake Me Up When September Ends. I fell to my knees when I heard it. I don't want her to have to deal with this.

Amanda didn't leave her room all day, and I wasn't one to force her. I let her confine herself to her room till the day of Erin's funeral. The boys went to stay with my mother and Adie, Erin and I got dressed in black.

The funeral was calm, sedated even with Mike and Tre there. Tre was too uneasy the whole time to make any jokes; I think he has issues with death. Amy's band mates were there too, she didn't talk to them, she didn't talk to anyone. She only talked to me and even then all she only talked to ask to go home.

Amanda spent the rest of the week locked in her room.
"Amy, I brought you some lunch." Adie says as she knocks on her door. I walk up to Adie, who's trying to balance the tray while knocking on the door, "She won't answer me."
"I think she's only been talk to me." I say as I take the tray from her.
"She has to eat something."
"Don't worry." I say as I knock on the door, Adie stares at me for a moment before walking away. "Amy its me." still no reply. I started to fear the worst at this point; I hadn't seen her all day. I crack open the door.

Her room looked like it was hit by a hurricane, and not in the nagging parent way. This literally looks hurricane stricken. Posters were ripped off the wall, various items were flung, drawers pulled out of the dresser with clothes thrown about and there are shards of glass in a pile on the floor from the lamp. Amy was no where to be found. I put down the tray.
"Amy!" I call out worried she'd hurt herself or worse. "Amy where are you?!" a sob is heard from the corner of the room. I run over her bed to find her sitting in the corner in the fetal position sobbing. Her usually smooth hair was a frizzing like crazy and her eyes were red. I get on my knees next to her and wrap my arms around her.
"It's okay." I mumble as she continues to sob.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She sobs.
"I'm not mad." I say craning my neck to check her wrists, they were clean. "I know how you feel, it's okay, it's okay."
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She continues.
"Maybe we should go outside." I suggest as I help her up, she was still in pajamas.
"No, I have to clean up."
"No you don't." I say pulling her out of her room, "I'll call the maid service and get the cleaning lady to come."
"No, I don't want you wasting money on my stupidity." She says as she pulls away.
"I'll take it from your college fund then." I say trying to find any excuse to get her out of that room. "And it's not stupid, it's normal." She gives up trying to pull away and walks ahead of me towards the stairs. I hurry back into her room to get her lunch tray. I catch up with her on the stairs.

"Let's go outside." I say as we reach the main floor. She doesn't say anything; she just walks out the back door to the outdoor table. I place the tray with her lunch in front of her.
"I'm not hungry." She says pushing the tray away from herself.
"Adie says you need to eat, I promised her you'd eat." I say pushing the tray back to her.
"Throw it in the garbage."
"No."
"Then you eat it."
"How about this, you eat half the sandwich and I'll eat the other half." I suggest raising my eyebrows.
"Fine." She mumbles as she picks up half of the ham and cheese sandwich. I take the other half and bite into it. I watch her intently as she finishes off her sandwich and opens the can of lemonade in front of her and chugs it down quickly. I just realized she hadn't eaten anything in like two days. She picks up the apple off the tray and bites into it.
"Do you want another sandwich?" I ask as cautiously. She shakes her head.

Moments later Adie joins us in the backyard with Markey.
"Oh shit." She says as she realizes him walking toward us.
"Don't worry." I say trying to calm her down, "You don't have to talk if you don't want to."
"No not that." She mutters as she pulls her messy hair into a ponytail.
"Oh that." I say chuckling. "You look fine."
"Liar." She mumbles.

"Hey Amy." Markey says quietly. I get up from my seat and walk past Markey.
"Hey Markey." I hear her says as Adie and I walk back into the house.
"Did she eat?"
"Yeah." I say as I dig under the kitchen sink for a garbage bag.
"What are you doing?"
"You haven't seen Amy's room yet, have you?"
"No why?"
"She got angry and took it out on her room." I say as I head upstairs with a garbage bag in hand.
"And you really need a whole garbage bag?" she asks in disbelief.
"Yeah, this girl can trash a room." I say chuckling. "Remember when Mike saw himself on TV?"
"Yeah." Adie says cautiously as we near the room.
"Well it's just about equal." I say as I open the door.
"Whoa, you weren't kidding." Adie says as she looks around.

We start cleaning up the room, most of the mess is ripped up posters so it went rather quickly.
"Billie." Adie says with a quivering voice. "Did Amy cut herself?"
"I didn't see anything, I checked her wrists." I say as I walk over to Adie who's holding a white t-shirt with blood stains on it. I stare at the t-shirt in shock for a while. I collapse onto the bed.
"I think I'll talk to her about this." Adie says as she leaves the room. I stay there scared out of my wits. After a few minutes I get up and continue to clean up the room, putting the drawers back in there place and clothes in her laundry basket. As I finish up picking up the pieces of the shattered lamp.
"It's okay." She says leaning on the doorway. "She had a nose bleed and didn't want to leave the room."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I checked her arms and legs, they're clean. It makes sense, when you cry your sinuses swell."
"Yeah." I say as I tie up the garbage bag.

Amy walks into the room.
"Dad, I told you I'd clean it." She says in disapproval.
"From past experience, I can tell you cleaning your own anger mess leads to more anger mess." As I leave the room with Adie.
"Dad, I'm going out with Markey. Okay?"
"Yeah sure." I say as she shuts her bedroom door.

We walk downstairs to find Markey watching TV with Joey and Jake in the family room.
"So, where are you taking Amanda?" I ask as sit on the couch as well.
"I was thinking of taking her out for coffee and if she feels up to it a movie."
"Okay." I say eyeing him to make sure he's not lying.
"Can I go to the movies?" Jakob asks eagerly.
"Not today." I say ruffling up his hair.
"Awe, why not?"
"I don't think Amy wants to take you along." I say laughing.
"She doesn't like you." Joey teases.
"That's not true." Markey says shaking his head, "she talks fondly about you two."
"Then why can't I come?" Jakob pesters.
"Oh jeez." Joey says flinging his head back.
"Uhh you'll understand when you start liking girls, or guys whichever." Markey says turning red.
"Now that I think about it, maybe I should send Jakob along to keep an eye on you two." I say evilly.
"No Dad, we'll behave." Amy says entering the room, dressed and her hair smoothed out.
"Alright, I'll see you later." I say as the two of them leave.