A Posse Ad Esse

She flicked the butt of her cigarette to the ground and trod on it before closing the window once more. She was in a state of irritation, aimed more at herself than anyone. She had come to a point in her life where she was sick of this repetitive day by day schedule, the people around her, everything. She needed something, anything, soon.

Upon leaving the room she knocked over one of her haphazardly stacked piles of books. She made a slight sound of frustration, and then sat at the top of her stairs putting her head in her hands. She needed change. She glanced towards her front door, this was her chance her escape from this life, this prison.

She listened silently for a moment, glancing towards their room – her captor’s – before treading softly out the door and into the dark bitter air.

It was different out there – she was free. She ran into the sinister forest, surrounding the place she had once called her home, what would now only be referred to as her past. She lacked any artificial light and could only visualise what the reflective moon would illustrate, fear was building up inside her as the adrenaline pumped though her veins. How long would pass before they’d notice she was gone? The images became abstract in the dark; her only focus was on getting as far away from that place as possible, she didn’t care for the view, not yet, not until she had gotten at least a mile away from them.

She paused for a moment to catch her breath, having travelled a good distance; running had gotten the better of her. She wasn’t sure how far she had gotten but her fear was slowly decreasing. Sitting down for a moment she looked towards the moon, for the moon did not judge or criticise her, but merely sympathised with her. Looking toward the moon and the stars she became sidetracked, vaguely forgetting where she was and what exactly had led her there. In that moment she found a tiny fragment of peace in the world.

Having come back to reality she thought back to the event, the boy, the reason her life has suddenly became so unbearable; but it was silly to think of that now, she knew the consequences.

She hadn’t stopped for too long before she started walking once more, walking miles and miles, isolated from society, hidden from them. Time mocking her as weeks passed, her strength was rapidly being lost. She was lost and afraid, a scared child. After a while had past, her hope was failing her and having found no-one she could give her heart to in her travels, she instead gave it to the wind. She could no longer bear to hold onto it, and would no sooner watch it falter and break. So she stood, on what seemed like the edge of the world, and threw her poor heart to the wind and the sea and the sky - to anyone or anything that could bear it. And in doing so she created a new meaning to the word heartless, and unleashed a new kind of pain into the world. Then nothing was said, just like that first moment - except then nothing needed to be said. This was a new kind of silence; there was no one present to speak. There was only this poor ghost of a girl, who had given the world her heart; who had all of the happiness and security in her life turned around and ruined, taken from her. No-one was here now to hear her last words, for now, after the shock and pain, she was little more than dead.