Lima Loser.

So, here I was, sitting on the counter in the girl’s washroom on my first day of school. Grape slushie dripped from my blonde hair, and I wondered why I’d gotten a slushie thrown in my face in the first place. All I did was walk through the hallway, trying to find my first class. And all of a sudden, some random guy with a mohawk came up to me, and just…threw a slushie at my face.

I didn’t have any spare clothes with me, and well, the showers were for “Cheerios” only, anyway. Hell, I didn’t even know what a Cheerio was, besides a delicious cereal. I’d only heard the term over the intercom: “Cheerios practice at four!”

I heard the bathroom door open, and in walked an innocent-looking brunette. She had the exact same thing done to her, except the flavour that covered her face was cherry.

She took one look at me and winced. “Guys are jerks.”

I nodded. “I’m new here. Is this some kind of ritual or something?”

“The jocks do it to everyone they think is uncool, which is a big percentage of the school, so please, don’t be bummed,” she explained. “Welcome to McKinley High, though. I’m Rachel Berry.”

I held out my hand for her to shake. “I’m Courtney…so, wait. It’s my first day, and I’m already uncool?”

“Well, it kind of depends. If you’re planning on being a cheerleader or dating one of the jocks, your popularity is sure to go up. Otherwise, wear a rain jacket 365 days of the year.”

“Oh, God. I’m screwed,” I frowned. I was ready to cry.

“Hey, don’t worry. There are a lot more of us. And even though we just met, I’ve got your back,” Rachel smiled.

The bathroom door swung open, and three other girls walked in. Two were blonde, and the other was Latina. They were all dressed in majorly ugly cheerleading outfits.

“You don’t even have your own back,” the first blonde rolled her eyes as she entered one of the stalls. The other two entered the stalls on each side of her.

“Quinn Fabray,” Rachel whispered. “She’s the head cheerleader, and those are her pet gerbils, Santana and Brittany. Don’t mess with them unless you’d like to get double-slushed.”

“Will do,” I shrugged as I attempted to clean the slushie off of my face. “Ugh, this stuff is sticky. I think I’ll just call home.”

I took out my cell phone and called my mother, but lucky for me, there was no answer.

“Do they expect me to go to class like this?” I asked Rachel.

“Actually, they do,” she nodded.

“Oh, God. Welcome to humiliation.” I jumped off of the counter, grabbed my book bag, and glanced at Rachel. “What’s your first class?”

“Biology,” she stated.

“Me too,” I smiled, happy I wouldn’t have to go to class alone. “Coming?”

“Yes,” she smiled, and followed me out of the bathroom. We walked to Bio together, and I was still trying to figure out what the school was all about.

We entered the class, and had about twenty heads look up at us, including the teacher’s.

“Wow, Miss Berry. I think this is the first time you’ve been late to my class,” the teacher’s eyes widened. “And who do we have here?”

“I’m Courtney, the new kid. Sorry for being late,” I apologized, and then pointed to my hair, which was stained purple. “Slushie emergency.”

The class chuckled, and the teacher gestured for me to take a seat in the back corner, by a window. This seat just so happened to be directly across from a literally gay-looking schoolboy and behind guess who? Mohawk boy.

Rachel took her seat near the front, which I was sort of bummed about. I’d rather not sit next to this dickhead, who I feared had another slushie up his sleeve.

“Well, Courtney, my name is Mr. Wheeler, and I’m going to be your Biology and possibly Physics teacher for the rest of however long you survive here. Sorry about the slushie incident. Especially on your first day,” Mr. Wheeler shook his head.

“Ah, no big deal,” I shrugged it off. “But just so you know, my hair is naturally blonde. Not purple.”

The class laughed, and when Mr. Wheeler had to leave the class to get his notes from the staff room, Mohawk turned around and gave me a huge smirk.

“Sorry about that,” he laughed. “If I knew you were new, I probably would’ve waited a day or so.”

I just glared at him.

“Not the death stare!” he joked. “No, but really. Sorry. I usually only do it to people I know.”

“Why do you do it, anyway?” I asked, pathetically.

“I’m on the football team. Reason enough?”

“Not really. This school is so fucking weird,” I looked around with a sceptical look on my face.

“I agree. Anyway, I’m Puck. Well, my name is Noah, but I’m known as Puck, so just…call me Puck,” he grinned as he held out his hand for me to shake. I was a bit hesitant, but did so.

“Can I just call you Fuck?” I rolled my eyes, still annoyed.

“That works,” he chuckled. “You’re funny.”

“Yeah, I know. Wanna know what’s not funny?”

“What?”

“This purple shit in my hair,” I tried to get the stickiness out of my hair by running my fingers through it, but that just made it worse.

“If we’re being honest, I think you’re rocking the whole ‘80’s colored mess’ look,” Puck smiled. This guy was a total joke.

The gay-looking guy across from me looked over, and spoke in such a feminine voice, I kind of flinched. “Puck, back off of the poor woman. Yeesh.”

“Shut up, homo, or I’ll dump you in the garbage box twice as much as I was going to today.”

The kid ignored him. “Sweetie, if you’re worried about your hair, feel free to come over to my house sometime. I’ve got the best products around.”

Puck rolled his eyes, and looked back at me. “Or you can come over to my house,” he winked.

I smiled and glanced over at gay guy. “Your offer seems less disturbing.”

“I know, right?” he laughed a super-homo laugh. But it was cute. “By the way, I’m Kurt. Kurt Hummel.”
“Otherwise known as the faggot of the school,” Puck laughed, as if it were actually hilarious.

“I’m sure he gets most of his ‘faggot’ tips from sitting next to you, Fuck,” I was too pleased with myself. Puck looked at me, wondering if I’d actually had the guts to say that to him.

Kurt smiled. “Courtney, I think we’re going to be great friends.”

“Me too, Kurt,” I nodded before Mr. Wheeler walked back into class. He assigned some work to us, and I spent the rest of the period feeling like a strong, superior young woman.