Spinning at the Seams

I was excited when my alarm went off the next morning. I was going to get to see Adam today! I studied myself in the mirror, trying to figure out what to do with my hair. Marc moved past me, shutting the door that led to the toilet again. I jumped when his voice came.

“Hey, Toni.” I looked at the shut door, well doors don’t talk, so that must be Marc talking, but Marc hasn’t talked to me in over two weeks, well at least nothing nice.

“Uh, yeah.” I said still staring at the door, wondering if they could talk, because that would make way more sense then this.

“Why do you think she did it?” I stared at the door, very confused, wondering who the she was.

“Who? Diana or Tiffany?” We had dropped the Tiffany conversation long ago, based on what I saw in the halls he was still with her, but it was hard to say for sure.

“Diana,” Ahh okay, that made more sense. I leaned my back against the counter, contemplating my sister’s motives.

“I really don’t know, I thought I knew her, you know, but then…” I trailed off, I couldn’t bring myself to admit the ultimate betrayal she had done, the knife in my back twisted slightly as I thought of it.

“No, I really don’t know, I don’t really know any of them at all.” He said quietly opening the door. I frowned, not sure what he meant. Seeing my frown he continued dropping decibels as he went.

“Toni, I don’t know them at all. I have no idea what goes on in their lives. I couldn’t tell you the last conversation I had with any of them.” I smiled sadly, I could.

It was the day before dad left. I was swinging on the swing that now sat abandoned in our yard. Marc was on the swing next to me, daring me to go higher. Olivia had then come running up to us, begging us to play Go Fish with her and Di. The fact that they were identical twins gave them an odd sense as to what cards the other one had. We had agreed, and Marc jumped from the swing, turning to me, daring me to do the same. I had, I had even landed farther then him. We had run to play, Marc and Olivia had teamed up, and won. The entire game between turns we had talked about nothing and everything at the same time. We talked about school, friends, sports, our futures, boys much to Marc’s annoyance. The next day I came home to a broken house, and that ended the conversations and games. It ended Marc’s conversations with us, after that he pushed us away, me especially, I sighed running a hand through my hair, wishing I had the answer to this problem. Or that the twin telepathy that Olivia and Diana seemed to have existed for us, that way he couldn’t lock me out. Our moment was lost with his phone going off, and him taking off to answer it. 'It will never change, they will always come first for him. Not me, not Olivia, not Julia, not Di, Them. The people he calls his friends, the ones who would turn on him in a heartbeat.' I walked back to my room, deciding my hair didn’t matter, what mattered was holding back the tears that were now threatening to fall.

I arrived a school early again, I couldn’t be alone with Marc again, my thoughts earlier had been a revelation. Thoughts I had known and never admitted to myself, ones I was determined to banish again. I walked around the large school aimlessly looking for someone to talk to. I nearly screamed when an arm grabbed me from a doorway. I looked up to see Tristan.

“Tristan, are you trying to scare me?” I demanded, he laughed, apparently scaring me was funny.

“No princess, I wasn’t trying to scare you.” I raised an eyebrow; I didn’t believe that for a second.

“And you couldn’t just say my name because?” I asked, he shrugged.

“Because, what would be the fun in that?” he asked grinning. I pointed a finger at him.

“Life’s not all about having fun you know.” He just shrugged again, the grin not leaving his face.

“For you maybe, but for me the more fun the better.” I shook my head, this boy was never going to change. I was saved from further discussion with him as I watched Adam walk by me.

“Adam!” I called after him, waving to Tristan, who had a slightly sad look on his face.

Adam didn’t turn, he just kept walking, his brow furrowed in concentration. I tried again.

“ADAM!” He still didn’t turn, kids were staring at me now, but I ignored them, running to catch up with my boyfriend.

“ADAM!” I screeched when I was right next to him. He jumped and whipped his head around to see me.

“Oh, hey. What’s up?” He looked nervous, but I tried to ignore that, deciding it was just my conversation with Marc making me edgy.

“Nothing much, you didn’t call me back. I was hoping to tell you sooner.” Adam looked at me, guilt passing over his perfect face.

“Oh, sorry, I got caught up, my grandparents needed help around the house. Sorry.” He looked sorry, but something was off, though I couldn’t place a finger on what.

“That’s okay, but do you remember how I told you that my dad left when his secretary got pregnant?” Adam flinched at the word pregnant and he snapped to look at me. He suddenly looked scared and guilty, what was going on?

“You know what, sorry, um, I’ve got to go, need to talk to my econ teacher about a project I need to make up, I’ll talk to you later.” He then kissed the top of my head, before walking quickly in the other direction; I turned to watch him go. Mel was coming towards Adam, and when she waved to him, he looked panicked.

“What’s with him?” asked Mel, coming to stand next to where I was frozen in place, watching the guy I trusted act like he had a huge secret.

“I really don’t know. Does your boyfriend act like this?” I asked turning to look at her. She shook her head, causing her blond hair to fall into her face.

“No, not really, only when he has some surprise planned. Maybe he’s planning a Christmas surprise for you.” She said cheerfully, I smiled really hoping that was it. I refused to think the worst, trust him needed to trust him.

“Yeah maybe, though my Christmas is already full of surprises.” Mel looked confused, and I started walking, letting her keep a steady pace beside me.

“My sister has forgiven my dad, and now we’re spending Christmas with him in California.” Mel’s mouth made an ‘O’ and she nodded. Her voice was hesitant as she asked the next question.

“Do you forgive him?” I shrugged thinking of my conversation earlier today, I couldn’t, and I knew that, the reason my world fell apart was because of him. How do you just forgive someone for taking the world out from under you?

“No” I said simply, letting that stand as my final answer. Mel seemed to accept this, and smiled suddenly.

“Are you coming to the winter show this year?” I tried to remember what that entailed. I was pretty sure it was Christmas music, Julia would enjoy that. I nodded, and watched Mel bounce up and down. I was saved from further bouncing by the bell, and her brother walking by us, not noticing either of us. Which just caused Mel to get annoyed and go chasing after him screaming the lyrics of some Hannah Montana song he hated as she went. I laughed as I watched him wince and walk faster. Marc suddenly walked by me, talking to Rick about some party tonight. I watched him go, wondering why we couldn’t be like Mel and Luke, siblings who fought but helped each other, and who got along most of the time.

Adam was distant the rest of the day. It bothered me to no end, I really needed to talk to him, and here he was lost in his own world. Hunter seemed to notice it too.

“Did you and Adam have a fight?” Asked Hunter watching Adam walk around the room to get to his seat, instead of just coming behind me like he normally does. I shrugged, and Hunter shot me a look.

“If that entails an I don’t know answer coming out of you mouth, I will be forced to make you watch the Notebook 300 times you know.” I rolled my eyes.

“No we didn’t have a fight, at least that I know of, but who knows what’s going through that boy’s head. One minute he’s all romantic, the next he’s acting like I’m the walking plague or something, it just makes no sense.” Hunter nodded, his eyes puzzled as he looked at Adam. As Adam turned to look at me, I turned away, and looked at Shannon who was just walking in.

“Hey Shannon.” Shannon looked at me, and grinned, coming to stand behind me.

“Hey Romans, what are you doing?” She asked looking at the computer screen, which was blank as I debated what to write about.

“Avoiding talking to Adam.” Shannon looked at me, and cocked her head to the side, grinning mischievously.

“Hey Adam,” She called, I turned to look at her, oh no she didn’t.

“What are you doing?” I hissed, Adam had turned towards us, and was now walking toward Shannon.

“What’s up?” He asked, looking at Shannon. I turned to Hunter, praying he would help me, he didn’t disappoint.

“Toni, are you going to that party tonight?” I rolled my eyes, I hated parties and Hunter knew that, but it gave me and escape from whatever conversation Shannon and Adam were having.

“No, Marc is of course, but I’m not if I can help it.” Hunter nodded, and Shannon turned to look at me.

“Why not Romans? It will be fun, Kyle and I are going.” I raised an eyebrow at her, was she off her meds, I don’t do parties she knew that. Adam was looking at me expectantly, now he cares what I have to say.

“I don’t do parties Shans, you know that, and I have plans tonight.” I saw Adam look confused, probably trying to figure out if we had plans. But if he was going to be that way, I wasn’t going to sit idly by.

“Hey Tristan,” Tristan’s head popped up at his name, and he got up strolling towards me.

“What’s up princess?” He asked, cocking his head, probably wondering why I would talk to him first.

“You want go shopping for Christa’s Christmas present tonight? I know you were looking for someone to help you.” Tristan looked at the ground, then back at me.

“Uh, well Christa and I broke up, but if your willing to help me shop for my sister, mom, and cousin, I’d be more then happy to go with you tonight.” Adam looked annoyed when Tristan mentioned that he had broken up Christa. He looked at me again, probably wondering what my next move would be. I still needed someone to talk to, and Tristan was a bit like my brother.

“Sure Tristan I’d love to go shopping with you tonight, if you’re willing to help me pick out Marc’s gift.” He grinned at the prospect of picking out my brother’s gift. Him and my brother had an odd friendship. They didn’t talk, but rather acknowledged each other’s presence, yet they were still friends. Adam looked even more annoyed then before and walked away. Shannon raised an eyebrow as Tristan walked away as well.

“So, you and Tristan. Knew it would happen eventually.” She grinned and I resisted the urge to hit her with a heavy object.

“No, Adam’s been avoiding me, and I need a guy’s opinion on what to do about my brother. I’d ask Hunter here, but I already hog his advice, so I decided Adam, but then he avoided me, so Tristan’s next in line.” Shannon shook her head and walked away as the bell rang. I might be mad at Shannon now, but she would be a lifesaver later.