I'm Not Okay (I Promise)
.o9.
There used to be this overwhelming loneliness whenever I thought of my life. My parents care more about being able to move around freely than keeping their own kid with them, my cousin probably doesn't even remember I live with him, and all I'm good at is random acts of juvenile delinquency that get me kicked out of school after school. I guess they don't want me there either. But I don't know, it's like the second I met Gerard, all the empty spaces in my life got filled up by him, and no matter how bizarre it would probably be to outsiders, it feels like the most natural thing in the world to be on my way home from a date with him, with the heat turned up high and the radio higher, talking about meaningless crap and wondering whether he's going to kiss me goodnight.
I hope he does.
I know we'll probably just end up making out in his car, and I know I'm stupid not to want that..it's just that whenever I pictured my first real date I always thought it would end with a kiss on my front porch underneath the moon or something.
Well it's not like I can ask, anyway. We're pulling into my driveway now, so I guess we'll see.
All of a sudden he's unlocking his car door and mine too, and getting out to walk me up to my front porch.
Oh my God, this is really happening.
We're standing just outside my door. He puts his arms around my waist and holds me in a way that's already becoming familiar. He leans in close and whispers,
"You're amazing."
And then he is cupping my face and kissing me softly, like he really means it.
Like I always wanted him to.
--
Yes..this is my favorite chapter.
The shortest one.
Lawl, I just think it's maybe a tiny bit cute?
I hope he does.
I know we'll probably just end up making out in his car, and I know I'm stupid not to want that..it's just that whenever I pictured my first real date I always thought it would end with a kiss on my front porch underneath the moon or something.
Well it's not like I can ask, anyway. We're pulling into my driveway now, so I guess we'll see.
All of a sudden he's unlocking his car door and mine too, and getting out to walk me up to my front porch.
Oh my God, this is really happening.
We're standing just outside my door. He puts his arms around my waist and holds me in a way that's already becoming familiar. He leans in close and whispers,
"You're amazing."
And then he is cupping my face and kissing me softly, like he really means it.
Like I always wanted him to.
--
Yes..this is my favorite chapter.
The shortest one.
Lawl, I just think it's maybe a tiny bit cute?