Cemetary Gates

I woke up again to the same scenery. My grey and purple walls and my black sky ceiling. As soon as I sat up, a heavy painful feeling settled in me and knocked me back down. I put my hand over my heart, clutching my chest. It got hard to breathe for a second, but the feeling was lifted away. It was like my heart was being shattered, over and over again. I've been getting those a lot lately...ever since he died.

It's also been a week since Zacky's death. It felt like the longest time. The world was rocked by his death; there wasn’t one TV station that didn’t have his face on it. There was a candlelight vigil the other day, I went to it. Hundreds and hundreds of fans were there, and it looked like a giant sun, with all of the candles lit. All of the band members and some fans talked about how they knew him, and how amazing he was. I didn’t have such memories of him, but it was beautiful to hear how many lives he had touched.

I got up out of my bed and went to my window. I leaned on the windowsill and saw a large concession of people surrounding a white coffin. I felt my breath hitch. It seemed so unreal, and now it just sunken in. He's dead...
I cracked my window open and a gentle crisp breeze blew in my face as I watched.
A petite blonde with long hair and a black dress stepped up to the microphone.

"Zacky was...hands down one of the greatest people I’ve ever met. He was so funny and sweet...He was one of my best friends ever since grade school, and I m-miss and love him. Rest in Peace Zacky..." She began to cry, and Matt took her into his arms.

"Me and Zack were like... those little punks when we were younger. We were always running around, getting into god knows how much trouble. We were best friends almost our whole lives. We wanted to grow up and start a band, and in high school we made it happen. Zack was such an influential part of this band, and our lives. You lived your dream man, Rest in Peace." Brian said, his eyes covered by sunglasses but tears ran from under them. I could feel tears running down my face as well, and dropping onto the frame of the window.

An older couple took the floor, and the crying woman managed to say.

"Zachary was such an amazing, and loving son. When they started the band, we knew he could do it. When he set his mind to something, he would get it done no matter what, and we had always believed in him for that. And I know my son loved what he did, and knowing he accomplished his dreams couldn’t have made him any happier. Goodbye Zacky, we will always love you, you are in our hearts forever." she finished and I was crying so hard. There were small tear puddles.

The four remaining members of the band took the stage, and Matt began singing a slow, heartfelt song. The soft melody kicked up and was carried through the breeze.

"Seize the day, or die regretting the time you lost, it's empty and cold without you here, too many people to wake over." More tears made their way down my face as I listened. Brian played a beautiful solo that lingered in my heart.

"Silence, without you no chance for one more day..." I could see visible tears down everyone's face, there wasn’t one dry face.

They soon began to slowly lower the pristine coffin into the ground, and cries of pain could be heard. I could only imagine the finality of his death they felt, as he was being lowered into the ground where he would stay forever. A strangled noise arose from my throat. A beautiful orchestration began to play and roses were dropped into the grave, as dirt sprinkled down from the sides.

The man with the short blonde and black hair released doves from a cage as "Rest in Peace" was said over the casket. People said their last goodbyes as they began to leave the site, looking back as the grave was being filled in.

I turned my head and I saw his sunglasses perched on my dresser. I walked over and held them in my hands. I looked back to the window before I grabbed my purple sweater and shoes and shuffled down my stairs. I went out my back door and over to the fence that hid the cemetery. There was no entrance, so I put the glasses on my head, and climbed over it. I landed on my feet with a 'thud'.
I looked at the fresh grace, and the black marble stone. It was square and in cut letters it read

Zachary James Baker
Dec 11th 1981 - April 10th 2008
Loving Son, Best Friend, and Guitarist
"Carpe Diem"

Another lone tear streaked down my face and onto the earth. I fumbled with the sunglasses, turning them over in my hands before I placed them facing up in front of his grave.

"Here these are yours." I began. I wanted to make things right with him. I believed I still had some chance.

"I don’t know if you know exactly who I am Zack, and I don’t expect you to. But I'm sorry for what I said to you. You didn’t deserve this. Believe it or not, I miss you, and if you can hear me, forgive me. Rest in Peace Zacky." I said quietly smiling a bit at the space. I got up and turned around, but I felt an extremely cold chill blow past my back, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand straight up. I whipped around and I didn’t see anything.

A strange wind blew from the direction of Zacky's grave. It blew the hair out of my face, as if it were coming towards me. I heard a hollow moan come through the wind, and right in front of my eyes materialized Zacky. My eyes widened and the breath caught in my throat. I took a step back, but I tripped over a rock and landed on my ass. The image was still there and I backed up fearfully blinking my eyes to make it go away.

STOP! I screamed inside my head, clenching my eyes hoping this was just my imagination. When I opened them, it was gone and I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding in.

I tried pulling myself up, but I felt something wrap under my arms and pull me up onto my feet. I turned around quickly and something cold moved my hair and tucked it neatly behind my ear.

This was seriously freaking me out.

"W-who is th-there?" I sputtered out. Darting my eyes in every direction trying to find what was doing this. I refuse to believe that Zack is haunting me.

Can you hear me? I heard a hollow ghostly voice ask. My eyes widened and I gasped as I saw Zacky appear again. I backed up and turned to run, but he reached out for me.

No...Don’t leave, please. I won’t hurt you. He said with a pleading look on his face.
I stopped once again. He moved towards me and I stood frozen in time. His green eyes let out a ghostly glow, they left his piercings in, and his hair was combed down in front of his face. He wore a black suit, with a red tie and a silver '6661' belt buckle.Why was he always so goddamn attractive

I forgive you too, Ana. And I should be the one to apologize; you never deserved what I did to you. I mean look at what you turned out to be. We were just so immature back then, and I’m sorry. He said, his voice echoing. I was shocked. I couldn’t say one thing even if I tried. I still thought someone was playing with my mind.

I’m really here. You’re not crazy. He seemed to read my mind, bur probably from my scared shitless expression, which might have given it away.

"I forgive you too..." I mumbled, still looking at him in awe. Why was he a ghost though? Shouldn’t he be in heaven or hell? Why is he still trapped here?

You know, I don’t really know why I’m trapped here. He said as if he read my mind again. He hooked his hands in his pockets He looked around as he sauntered over to me.
It kind of reminds me of "Afterlife". Ironic, maybe I’ve arrived too early." He said laughing lightly. I was still amazed by him. He began singing and the way he sounded made me want to cry all over again.

And when I think of all the places I just don’t belong. I've come to grips with life and realize this is going too far. I don’t belong here, I gotta move on dear, escape from this Afterlife... He sang before his gaze returned to my eyes.

"Wow..." was all I could manage. I could feel more tears brimming my eyes. Crying is all I've been doing it seems. He looked at me sadly.

"Oh no, please don’t cry. I can’t stand to see people cry anymore. Especially over me. I watched almost everyone I know and didn’t know cry over me, with no way to console them. I even watched my own funeral, and I don’t want you to cry too." He said with soft eyes, it looked like he was going to cry and it made me want to cry more.

I reached up and tried to wipe one off his face, but my hand just went through and it was like putting my hand into cold water.

I can't feel...

Tears found their way down my cheeks as well.

Don’t Cry He reached up to wipe my tears away, but it was like cold water running on my face.

"How can I not anymore! You’re...your dead!" I exclaimed.

"I didn’t know you still cared about me." What did he mean by still? Was he getting at something?

I knew you liked me. He said, but not in a cocky tone. More of a pained one, afraid of my reaction. So that’s why he did that...oh that asshole. I felt myself get pissed all over again and he noticed.

“I’m sorry, its just that, after what happened I was under the impression you hated me and didn’t care anymore."

“I did hate you." I mumbled

"I tried to forget you all. I tried not to get hurt again. I didn’t have much of a life and I blamed you. I hated you for five years." I said, and he looked hurt.

"What changed"

“I saw you again. You weren’t the same person I could tell. I was somewhat relieved you weren’t the same, but my mind wouldn’t let me forget what you did. But you did change me in some way. I’m the way I am today because of you. And I realized something that I didn’t change to prove everyone wrong, I changed for you" I said releasing what I’ve felt for five years onto him. He didn’t say anything at all and I could barely describe the look on his face

Shock, disappointment, disbelief, sadness, sympathy, and anger.

" I-I never knew...I...I didn’t even know I could do that. God, Ana I’m sorry. I know I told you but I seriously am. And you’re beautiful; you don’t need to change anymore. I mean five years ago I couldn’t see that but your too good for me. In fact I wouldn’t even deserve you. Please don’t change anymore for me." He said, he grabbed my hand and I got cold chills.

"I'm not here anymore. I don’t matter now. He said gazing deep into my eyes so truthfully. I can’t believe I’m going to say this now.

"You will always matter Zacky." I reached out and wrapped my arms around his neck. It felt like I jumped into a cold shower, and he wrapped his arms around my waist as well.

"Thanks Ana, you think we are okay now? I heard his voice near my ear, and despite the temperature that gave me chills alone.

"Yeah, I know we are." I said letting go of him. I was really cold now; I looked back to my house for a second.

"I’m going to go inside now. I’m cold." I said smiling. He flashed me a dazzling smile that made my heart dissolve.

"I'll definitely be back though." I said hopefully. He nodded and replied.

Okay, bye Ana. He said with one more wink and we turned around at the same time to head in different directions.

"Wait!" He called out, his voice echoing over the still air. I turned to see him holding the glasses.

"Keep ‘em He said with a friendly smile and he tossed them to me. I caught them and smiled again. I put them on my head just like before.

"Thanks Zacky, bye." I called and he nodded. I watched him gracefully turn around and walk as if in slow motion back to his grave and dematerialize. I stared at the spot for a while before I felt the glasses being pushed onto my nose. I smiled and walked back to where I came.