The Natives

Honestly, I did nothing to the pork chops. To Matt, though, it wasn't this way. He ended up puking his guts out that night, but I don't know why. Nobody did. Maybe it was the thought that I might have done something. None of the others ended up that way.

I felt bad, though. As soon as I heard him fall back into his room, I went into the bathroom and grabbed a cold washcloth. I gently knocked on his door, but I heard no reply. I opened the door, and Matt lay facedown on his bed.

I sat by his side and said, "Matty?"

He turned and looked up at me, but he gave me no reply.

"I didn't do anything to the pork chops," I said. "You know that, right? I swear on my life."

"Yeah, right," Matt groaned, rolling over onto his side.

"I'm serious," I replied. "Don't you think the rest of us would be like this?"

"Kara, I know what you're trying to do," said Matt. "I was right and you were wrong, so now you're trying to get back at me. You know I don't control right and wrong. This isn't my fault."

I pushed his curls away and set the washcloth down on his forehead. "You can believe what you want, but I didn't do anything to the food. I just meant to give you a scare-"

"Yeah, so I guess me throwing up uncontrollably is because I'm bulemic," Matt said.

"You probably just have the stomach flu or something," I replied. "I don't know. But it wasn't me."

"Sure, sure." Matt groaned and rolled over on his side. "Ow, fuck."

"I'm sorry, Matty," I said, laying down next to him. I looked into his eyes and whispered, "If it was the food, I didn't mean to."

Matt smiled and touched my arm, "I forgive you for trying to kill me."

I rolled my eyes. "You're such a child."

It was silent awhile, as it usually was when I was like this with the guys. I stared past him at the wall, but his eyes were fixated on me. Somehow I felt our heartbeats beating together, despite his being unsteady and mine fluttering uncontrollably. I rolled over and put my back to his chest.

"Kara?" Matt said in a low voice. "I'm really sorry about Ashley."

I bit the inside of my lip, but I said nothing.

"When I said he wasn't right for you, I meant he just seemed like a player," Matt continued. "I didn't know he was married or anything like that. He wasn't wearing a ring."

I smiled as Matt's arms wrapped around my waist, and I felt his curls fall against the back of my neck. I touched his hand.

"You couldn't have known," I said. "No one could have." I took a deep breath. "It's over now, and that's all that matters."

Matt nodded. I looked out the window at the black sky- cloudless and still. I closed my eyes and sighed quietly. Matt sat up and handed the washcloth back to me. I took it and held it in my hand, but I did not move. I still stared at the sky.

"Kara, are you alright?" asked Matt.

I nodded silently.

"Are you sure?" He waved a hand in front of my face, and I snapped away from my daze.

"Yeah," I said. "Yeah, I'm fine."

I stood up off the bed and smiled at him. He smiled back at me, laying his head back on the pillow.

"I'm sorry I never called you guys," I said. "Maybe it would have made my time in Bakersfield a little more tolerable."

"I'm sorry we never called you," Matt replied. "You were part of us. You still are."

I smiled and said, "Go to sleep, Matty. You need it."

"Same to you, Kara," Matt chuckled.

I shut the door behind me and smiled. I tossed the washcloth in the bathroom on the way to my room, and it landed with a cold smack in the sink. The house was silent and every sound I made echoed off the walls. Aron was asleep in his room, and Jordan and George had gone home. It was never this quiet here, as far as I could remember.
-----------------------------------------
I woke to the sound of my phone vibrating on my nightstand. I rubbed my eyes and looked around. The clock read 10:30 AM, but I was still tired. I lay my head back on my pillow as the phone ceased to ring. I closed my eyes again, hoping to doze off, but my phone started up again.

"Fuck," I hissed.

I reached over and grabbed my phone. I shook my head, trying to wake myself. It was hard but eventually I looked down at the caller ID.

My anger began boiling over as I read the too-familiar name. He had no right to call me. Not now, not ever. I shouldn't even have picked up the phone, but for some ludicrous reason, I did.

"Alex," I said into the receiver.