Our Own Little Piece of Heaven

(Alexandria’s POV)

After our fit of giggles and everyone changing we ended up in my living room lounging around like a bunch of lazy asses that we were. Surprisingly Rachelle and I had a day off; well we were starting our three week Christmas vacation from work. It seemed sad how much Rachelle and I spent our time working at the store, but hey I needed to pay to keep my horse and Rachelle needed to pay for studio time with her band.

“I’m bored.” Brian said while laid on the chair that Jimmy normally claimed. I was happy to see Brian wearing his purple, sleeveless, shirt that had a cross on the middle that screamed ‘BAM! I’M BLACK!’ with a black vest on over it. He wore his tight black jeans and his black fingerless gloves. He also wore his purple bandanna under his black fedora.

“I’m glad you guys are in normal clothes.” I said while tugging at the shirt Jimmy was wearing earlier, yeah I just took that outfit back and wore it… Surprisingly he didn’t stretch it out.

“So am I!” Johnny exclaimed as he sat with his hands pulling on his white wife beater and the black button up shirt he kept open. Rachelle sat next to him in her simple black outfit as she played with the chain on his jeans.

We laughed at his stupidity as Nicole’s phone began playing Black Veil Bride’s Mortician’s Daughter. She picked it up and you could hear her mother on the other end. Nicole quickly agreed to whatever was being said and hung up her cell.

“I have to go home and help with Toxicity.” She said and my head snapped up.

“I’ll be back!” I screamed before running upstairs.

(Jimmy’s POV)

My head flew back when she jumped up and ran up stairs.

“What’s wrong with her?” Cole asked Nicole and I thought she was talking about Alex.

“She hasn’t seen Alex in two weeks so she’s antsy.” Nicole said with a shrug as she got up.

“Haha, Alex’s horse would be too much for one person to handle.” Bianca said and the guys looked at her like she had three heads.

“Yeah...”

“Ready!” Alex yelled as she bounced down the steps with a black duffel bag. I looked at her as she shimmied into her black thermal hoodie.

“I swear you knew.” Nicole said and I was lost.

“I texted Daddy and he said he’d be over soon.” Cole said as everyone put on their sneakers.

“Why the sneakers? I thought Cole preferred shoes that made her taller.” Brian asked while putting on his boots.

“You don’t want to wear anything but sneakers at my house.” Nicole before we heard a honking. We all followed the girls out with questioning looks.

(Alexandria’s POV)

As we pulled up to Nicole’s house the boys’ mouths dropped. The outside of the house seemed like it was closed in and very small. It was a white house with black bordering. The structure of it had the main part of the house; the front door and stone walk way, as the focus then it had two walls, like, popping out of the sides. The styling was old and beautiful.

“Oh my god!” Brian screamed as he saw a golden retriever running to Nicole.

“Hey blondie!” She yelled as the dog stood on his hind legs and put his front paws on her chest. Blondie was one of her three dogs. I had the pleasure of naming her since Nicole called out she wanted the runt of the litter from her old dog, Majesty.

“Nicole, are the girls with you?” Her mom called and I smiled.

“Hey mom!” I called and I heard her laughing. “We’re going to go get changed right now!” I yelled before dragging Nicole into her own house.

(Cole’s POV)

I took the guys as Bianca, Rachelle, and I went to go say hi to Nicole’s mom. After walking the whole property, which is like one of the few big properties in our town, we found her at the stalls as she was fighting to calm down a gray horse that had white hooves and a white mane with gray tips.

“Christ!” Jimmy yelled when he saw the horse.

“It’s big…” Brian said with a whistle.

“It’s un-tamable.” Johnny muttered before stepping back.

“I can tame it!” Matt said while stepping forward.

“Toxicity!” We heard Alex scream before running towards the horse.

Instantly the beast calmed down when her ears perked at Alex’s voice. Alex managed to grab the reigns from Nicole’s mom and started to pet Toxicity’s neck. Her ‘whisper’ singing can be heard over the wind as a smile stretched across her face.

“Um…” Jimmy said before Nicole stopped over near us.

“That’s Toxicity, Alex’s horse. If she isn’t at school, work, or home she’s at my house taking care of her baby.” Nicole explained as we smiled.

“Wait when did Alex get a horse?” Brian asked and we smiled at his confused face.

“Well she’s turning three this year, so three years.” Nicole explained while doing the math in her head.

“What’s her breed?” Johnny asked as we moved closer to Alex and Toxi.

(Alexandria’s POV)

“She’s a Mustang and Shire.” I said as they came closer to us. “Toxi is a very… well let’s just say that she’s only calm if she sees me or if she’s being handled by Nicole and her family. She doesn’t like anyone else.” I explained as Jimmy attempted to pet her. Toxi began stomping and flaring her nostrils and Jimmy fell to the floor with a loud thump.

“She hates me…” He pouted as we laughed at him.

I turned to Toxicity and pulled her head down so my lips were in her ear.

“Be nice. They won’t hurt you. They’re good friends.” I whispered and she whinnied before lowering her head to Jimmy and nudging him a little. He flinched and I began to giggle. “It’s okay, she’s apologizing and wants to be your friend.” I said as he hoisted himself up.

“Can you ride the beast?” Matt asked and I looked at Jimmy.

“I don’t know. I haven’t tried to ride Jimmy yet.” I said before feeling a slight shove. I turned to see Nicole’s mom giving me a look that said ‘Be careful.’ “I love you mommy!” I said before hugging her.

“I love you too.” She said before going to take care of the other horses.

“But yeah, I know how to ride her, thanks to Nicole.” I said while slightly nudging my friend.

Suddenly we heard galloping and we turned to see Nicole’s black and white Mustang and Lusitano named Sixx. Sixx is five years old and the top horse at the ranch, he made sure everything ran well... Which is weird since he’s a horse but it just proved Nicole and I right about how animals are smarter than humans. He’s seen a lot and had the scars to prove it. The corner of his left lip still had stitches from when he cut his self on the barbed wire, before both Nicole and her mom cut it down, and had A666 branded on his left hip. A666 was the branding Nicole used when she found out he had to be branded for his own safety, Toxicity’s was the actual toxic sign. He also wore a black rosary around his neck, it just fit well with him.

“Hey Sixx.” Nicole cooed as she petted him lovingly. “Everyone, this is my horse Sixx. He’s my big boy.” She announced smiling

“He’s calmer than Toxicity.” Brian commented and I giggled.

“What’s so funny?” Matt asked as they went over to pet Sixx. I felt Toxi fidgeting as he was being surrounded.

“I wouldn’t crowd him.” I said giggling more. Jimmy instantly stepped over to Toxi and started to pet her as the girls just backed away.

“Why?” Zacky asked before Toxi began bobbing her head.

“Cause Toxicity is one jealous lover.” Nicole answered with a huge grin. Yeah, our horses were lovers and it was just so adorable. Everyone then backed away as Toxi trotted to Sixx and began to cuddle with him.

“Hey, you wanna race them?” I asked Nicole and she got out her wallet.

“How much are we betting this time?” She asked as I got out my wallet. Our horses tended to be bipolar with who would finish first so we often took bets.

“Twenty each.” I said as she placed a bet on her horse.

“I have twenty one Toxi, she looks pissed.” Cole said as Jimmy joined her.

“Twenty on Sixx. He looks like he wants to flaunt his stuff.” Bianca and Rachelle said.

“Boys, are you gonna join?” We turned to Matt, Brian and Johnny.

“Don’t mess with a chick.” Matt said as he placed a twenty in on Toxi.

“I don’t play on the horses.” Brian said as both him and Johnny backed out of the deal. Pussies.

(Brian’s POV: Past all the horse set ups and getting them to a track)

I watched as my cousin mounted her horse and got into a starting position. I knew she had always liked horses, hell she told me that she was going to live on a farm and breed them, but she always had this problem with heights; she was always very afraid of it. Whenever she was picked up she’d cry and scream for people to put her down.

We heard a starting pistol and the girls took off. Nicole was in the lead and when I went to go see how Alex was doing I flipped.

“Why isn’t she wearing a helmet?” I asked Bianca as she cheered on Sixx.

“Alex never wears a helmet, something about how she trusts Toxicity with her life.” Bianca shrugged before going back to cheering.

I shook my head before looking at Jimmy. I was still pretty pissed that he was dating my cousin since his last girlfriend ended up becoming pregnant and having to have an abortion. If that were to happen with Alex… Well I know she can’t take a life, let alone a life that never got the chance to live, without it haunting her for life. She’d raise the kid and be a wreck by the time it turned five, I mean, she’s still a kid herself.

“Go Alex!” Jimmy screamed and I felt the urge to just knock him out when I thought about all the times he’s kissed her and cuddled with her. I think I should tell her about his past.

“Bri?” Johnny asked with eyes full of concern. I shook my head before leaving. I didn’t want to think about my best friend with Alex, that’s like thinking about the devil dating a pure, holy spirit.

(Johnny’s POV)

I saw Brian glaring at Jimmy and could figure out why. Even back home when Jimmy and I first met him he was always talking about how much he loved his sweet and innocent cousin. So, seeing his angel dating a drug addicted and alcohol addict must be hard.

“Bri?” I asked and he shifted his eyes to me before leaving. I ran towards Jimmy and placed my hand on his shoulder as he began jumping up and down while cheering for his beloved. “Jimmy?” He turned around in a spaz attack and his hand bitch slapped me. “Ow.” I muttered while rubbing my red cheek.

“Sorry. What’s up short shit?” Jimmy asked and I turned to were Brian walked off to.
“I think you should go talk to Brian.” I mumbled as Jimmy followed the direction of my thumb.

“Yeah, I’ll do that now.” Jimmy said before running off.

“And the winner is Toxi!” Cole sang out as Nicole and Alex came back.

“Pay up bitches.” Matt said as they gave him the money to split up to give to the winners.

I looked at Alex as she stared at Jimmy running towards Brian and sighed. ‘Worried’ and ‘Concern’ was etched all over her face as she reigned Toxicity under control. The others were talking about the lost money or the new financial gain the acquired today so they didn’t notice it one bit. I walked over to her with a smile.

“That was some sweet riding.” I commented and she looked at me with a flushed face.

“Thanks… What’s wrong with Jimmy?” She asked and I sighed while looking down.

“I told him he should go talk to Brian.” I explained as she dismounted from her horse and Nicole went to go return the beasts to their stalls.

“Is Brian mad that Jimmy and I are dating?” She asked and I gave her a shaky smile.

“More like, Brian knows about Jimmy and he just wants this image of his perfect little cousin to remain in his mind.” She nodded with a sarcastic chuckle.

“Thanks. I think Imma go check and make sure they don’t kill one another.” She kissed my cheek before running after the two idiots.

(Brian’s POV)

“Hey Bri, wait up!” I heard Jimmy call before he caught up to me in two long strides.

“Hey.” I said meekly.

“Um, so I kinda feel like you’re pushing away from our friendship, and honestly I don’t want that since you’re one amazing mother fucker, who I want to marry.” Jimmy smiled as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I laughed as we walked to the front of the house while trying to avoid stepping on the many cats these people have.

“Yeah, sorry. I guess I’m just getting used to you dating Alex… I mean she’s such an angel and, no offense, you’re not.” I said as he laughed and shook his head.

“Yeah, I get where you’re coming from. But I won’t hurt her… She’s important to me.” I groaned and he stared at me with a look that questioned my sanity.

“You’ve known her for how long? Not even a week, and you already feel like she’s special and you know more about her past three years than I do!” I screamed in frustration.

“She’s probably afraid to tell you how her life has been, it seemed like she forced herself to tell me.” He sighed before smiling at me like the dork he is. “And the only reason, at least to me, that it seems so right to be with her is because ever since I’ve met you, you’ve talked about her like she was the highlight of your life. Everyone could see it, that’s why Michelle called it quits too, she was tired of competing to be number one in your heart. Plus, it’s just like she was meant to be with me and I was meant to be with her.” Jimmy explained before tripping over a duck.

“Jimmy!” I heard Alex scream as she shooed away the duck.

“That’s a huge fucking duck! Bri, isn’t that a huge ass duck? I mean that’s almost the size of the stallion duck we chased in Central Park!” Jimmy yelled while trying to grab the duck.

“Jimmy.” Alex laughed and shook her head as she grabbed the bird. “Jimmy, stop trying to kill Nicole’s pets with your clumsiness.” She said while handing him the duck.

“It came out and ATTACKED me!” He screamed as it started flapping its wings and hitting his face. “SEE! IT’S DOING IT AGAIN!” I laughed and pried the winged beast from his hands.

“Come here crazy.” Alex hoisted him up before she turned to face me with a smile. “Bri, can I talk to you?” I nodded my head and we began to walk with Jimmy behind us. She turned to face him with a smile. “Alone. Sorry Jimmy, I need to talk to him alone.”

“Oh okay. I’ll be on my marry way then.” He sang out before skipping away and singing ‘A spoonful of Jimmy makes the world go down.’ I laughed before turning to my favorite cousin.

“Bri, can I have a piggy back ride like you used to give me?” She asked with an innocent voice and swinging her torso right and left. I chuckled before kneeling down for her to get on. “Sweet.” She giggled while wrapping her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. I placed my palms at her mid-thigh and grunted as I stood up.

“You got fat over three years.” I said and felt her slap my chest.

“And you got meaner.” She smiled before burring her face into my neck.

I sighed when it felt like we were going back in time. To when she didn’t have a boyfriend or the multitude colors in her hair. When she’d cling to me after Matt teased her about how she’d get lost in music and the first time we introduced Zacky to her. I smiled when I remembered seeing Alex’s reaction when she saw Zacky, Matt, and I by the Christmas tree for the first time. She came running down in a pure white nightgown and ran into our arms with tears streaming down and saying Santa really did exist.

“Brian… I’m not that little girl I used to be anymore.” She whispered like she was reading my thoughts.

“Yes you ar--”

“No, I’m not. I wish I could be, but I’m not… I can’t even pretend to be.” I felt warm liquid on my neck as we neared the pond, yes we followed the duck. I set her down and turned to face her.

“What are you talking about? You’ll always be my little angel.” I whispered while whipping away the tears as her brown orbs stared at me watering up.

“I’m no angel.” She laughed bitterly and placed her hands over my mouth when I went to speak. “Please, I need to tell you everything.” She begged me and, as much as I wanted to shout out that I didn’t want to hear it, I let her continue. She sighed before looking at me again.

“The last time I saw you, was probably the last year I was that angel you want me to be.” I looked at her, praying she was still a virgin. “No Bri, I didn’t have sex.” I let out the breath I didn’t even know I was holding in. “When we got back to New York.. The fighting started up again between the parentals, I know we both knew they fought constantly, but it got worse. And then Alice got shot for the first time, so Ryan and I would drink ourselves silly. Like, I can’t go into most public places anymore cause we got hammered and got to ‘wild’ is how they put it.” She smiled as I glared at her, I didn’t want her drinking anything other than the legal shit. “Bri, I’ve done worse.”

“How could you do worse than that shit?” I asked and she looked away from me.

“Well, Nick told Ryan about a few drugs, like E, and we tried it. But Bri it was only the one time. We couldn’t do that shit cause it was just not us.” She explained as I walked away and rubbed my face with my hand, I’m glad I didn’t wear eyeliner.

“Why would you even try it? That shit is stupid and you have no rea--”

“Don’t give me that shit Brian! Matt told me that you guys were into drugs too, that your fucking ex was your dealer!” She yelled and my mouth dropped.

“When did he tell you that?” I asked moving forward but stopped when I saw her flinch.

“The two fucking years I couldn’t get in contact with you or Zacky. Bri, Matt has been there when you were fucking your girl or hopping from one girl to the next! And then how was I supposed to tell the one person who saw me as a saint that I was drinking, smoking, doing drugs, I saw my best friend die right before my eyes and going suicidal? Tell me Brian, because I sure as hell didn’t know how to! I told Zacky and Matt because they didn’t put me on this fucking pedestal that made me so afraid to tell you one thing.” She yelled while crying for the first time since our grandfather died.

“So Zacky and Matt knew, complete strangers when compared to me, knew all this shit and I didn’t?” I seethed and she nodded her head yes. “Why? Why is it so hard for you to tell me these things? And where’s Ryan? I’ll kill the fucker for getting you into that life.”

“You can’t dip shit!” She screamed and I felt the anger rising in me.

“Why can’t I?”

“Because he’s DEAD!” She yelled before collapsing on the snow. “He died last year, in the car accident.” Her body started to shake from the force of her tears. “If he was alive he wouldn’t leave you guys alone, you were like his brother.” She cried out as I went over to hug her.

“I’m so sorry.” I whispered as I wrapped my arms around her. “What happened?” I asked as I rocked her back and forth.

“After we picked up Nicole, Bianca, and Rachelle from their summer band program we were on our way to the mall, Rachelle and I had to go to work at F.Y.E. A silver Chevrolet Traverse was on the wrong side of the road and was heading straight for us, I swerved to the left and the car hit Ryan’s side full force. The car flipped over multiple times and then my side, like, bent into the tree. When I saw everyone else I saw that the girls were okay, but Ryan was already having difficulty breathing. Nicole saved the girls by having the only car door that was able to open. Ryan told me to leave him, but I couldn’t. I had Nicole help me get him out before I crawled out. When I was finally out of the car I told her to go call for help and I would get Ryan to everyone… Suddenly the car exploded and I heard their cries before blacking out.” She started to cry more and I tried lulling her to tell me more, I knew she wasn’t done yet.

“What else?” I cooed as she regained her composure.

“When I woke up.. I was in the room where Ryan was as he was dying, but I didn’t know it until I saw his face. I saw the doctors rushing in and helping someone who was on code red, yet the curtain blocked my view so I got out of bed and looked as the person was charging up paddles. I saw Ryan’s body laying on the stretcher and I remember thinking that he was already dead. That there was nothing that could be done to save him. After his heart monitor finally went flat I went into darkness and woke up three weeks later. Everyone has been calling me a murder since then, and I believed them. I asked myself why everyone BUT him survived, why couldn’t I go in his place? I started to just lock myself in my room and stare at the walls and smile at the memories. It was hard for me to even face Cole and Nick afterward.” I understood why she couldn’t look at Nick, but why not Cole?

“Why couldn’t you look at her?”

“That was Cole’s boyfriend that died. The day after marked their one year. I actually found out yesterday that it was my dad who was the drunk driver. Sara told me at the hair salon. She said that the reason Ryan died was because when the car hit his side his ribs broke and by the time they got him to the hospital his one rib punctured his lung and that’s how he died.” She turned to me with eyes that held so much pain and suffering that my heart knotted and almost broke at the sight. “Bri, I wanted to tell you, I wanted you to come to New York with the first flight out here and just cry into your arms but I couldn’t. You had a life, a girlfriend, and I never had the right to expect you to drop everything for me. I couldn’t let the image of a perfect angel slip away from you… I wanted at least the way you saw me to always remain the same, but I can’t lie to you anymore. Bri- bear… I’m sorry that I can’t turn back time.” She cried again and I wrapped her up into a hug and pulled her closer to me.

“I’m so sorry. I just wanted you to live a happy life, I didn’t mean to make you feel so uncomfortable that you couldn’t tell me something like that. If you had told me I would’ve dragged the guys up here sooner and wouldn’t leave until you could smile again. I promise I won’t ever let you go through that shit alone. I love you Alex.” I said while kissing her hair, forehead, and cheeks as the tears came out of my eyes.

“I love you Bri-bear.” She whispered and we started to laugh at the name she had given me when we were younger.

“I love you too Ale.” I whispered before we started to get attacked by the ducks.

“I think we should run!” She laughed out while helping me up.

“Run for your life!” I screamed as we went running towards the house and our friends who were waving to us like idiots.