Blue Paint & Red Lights

Another day without hearing from Antti was hell. I eventually woke up around noon and realized that it was Sunday and I wouldn't have to work tomorrow. It lightened up my mood enough to get out of bed and make myself some breakfast.
My parents were out in the garage, my mother smoking and my dad keeping her company. I made some waffles and brought them down into the basement with me. It was recently finished and I was glad for it- otherwise the cold concrete that was now covered in tile and carpet would have frozen my bare feet.
I padded across the basement to where the television sat across from the large black couches. Cradling my waffles perfectly, I sat and turned on the television. The basement was painted in beige- the only color my father liked on walls- and pictures hung from the walls. Pictures of my old Blackhawks memorabilia, pictures of my father playing baseball when I was just fourteen years old, and a massive Chicago Cubs fathead that took up almost half of the wall I faced. His model WWII airplanes hung from the ceilings using fishing wire just added to the sense of 'man cave'. I was feeling somewhat uncomfortable eating my waffles and flipping through channels in such a man-oriented basement, even if all the things down here represented my father's hobbies. I was surprised when I turned on the t.v. it wasn't already tuned to the MLB Network, like it usually was. Instead, it was Comcast Sportsnet and it was a Blackhawks home game.

I was ashamed that I had forgotten there was a game today. A home game, of all games. I wondered if Angelina was sitting in our usual seats behind the bench and strained my eyes whenever the cameras panned that way. I set the remote down beside me just as my father descended the stairs. "Good, you've got the game on." He said, making me slide over so he could have 'his seat'.
"Why isn't your boy starting?" He asked after he took a long, squinting look at the television.
"He didn't do well the last game. Coach Q is just doing some damage control, I guess." I too, stared at the young Crawford in net. Something was going on with Antti this time, and I was glad it didn't have the opportunity to show in his play.
My father and I silently watched the 60 minutes of hockey and made the appropriate noises where they were needed.

The game had finally ended in an overtime win. Byfuglien had the game winning goal and my father and I breathed a breath of relief.
It was around four when we emerged from the basement, looking equally haggard. I climbed the stairs to reach my old bedroom and finally, my old bathroom and shower.
It felt sublimely nice to just relax and use the copious amounts of hot water. I came out clean and with a new outlook.
I was going to have fun tomorrow and then when I came home, Antti and I would make amends. I still had no idea what was wrong with him and why he needed time, but I would give it to him and then be there to pick up the pieces. I was fully prepared to do that for him.
It was strange, accepting that this man was too good for me, and I didn't deserve him. Normally, I was the one who knew that I was too good for most of the guys I dated, but Antti was different. Even if he was a better person than I was, I wanted to work things out so we could happily live out our lives with each other.

Those were the thoughts that plagued my mind until the next morning, after I had gotten dressed in nice jeans, low heels and a plaid shirt I had picked up the night I left town.
It was suiting for the alumni basketball game that began at noon in the high school gym.
I couldn't help but laugh as I pulled up in my SUV in the student parking lot I hadn't drove into for a long, long time, about ten years. The gravel crunched under my feet when I made my way to the side entrance. I still remembered that this was the door they would have open for basketball games and I braced myself for seeing high school friends again. I swung open the door and walked up to the person who sat at a folding table near the entrance to the gym.
"How much for alumni?" I asked them, fishing bills out of my pocket.
"Only three dollars, doll." The southern accent answered.
I started to chuckle as I made simple conversation with my old art teacher. He aged nicely and somehow managed to retain his accent.
"Enough talking to me, go in, they'll be pleased to see you again." He stamped my hand and I walked into the large gym, the largest room in the whole one floor school.
"Samantha Leigh-" Someone called and another voice finished for them, "Niemi!"
A small smile crossed my lips as the two walked up to me. They were my two amigas during my last three years of high school and my partners in crime when it came to confusing other people. I guess the name 'Samantha' was common in the small town before I moved in, because my two friends shared my name. I was always referred to as, 'Samantha' while another was 'Sam' and 'Sami'.
"Sam! Sami! How are you two?" We shared a group hug and I looked from one to another. Sam was looked more like her mother than ever. She still had the long wavy brown hair that was piled on top of her head at the moment and the small, athletic build. Sami still looked quiet and stood like she would rather be somewhere else.
"What have you guys been doing?" I asked again and Sam answered first.
"I'm finally Captain of my own cruise ship!" She shouted in her usual fashion, followed by a small twitch dance type of deal. "Sam, you totally haven't changed!" I laughed and added, "Congratulations! You're going to give me trips, right?" She nodded her consent and I turned to Sami and said, "Well? Tell me everything!"
Sami had a small smile and raised her left hand sheepishly. "Tim and I are married."
"I knew it!" Sam jumped around again. "My god, Sami! Congrats!" I quickly said, admiring her ring.
Sami and Tim were high school sweethearts and it was adorable to see her this happy, even if she was still quiet and shy.
"How about you, Samuel?" Sam used my nickname that was same for each of us within the group. "What have you been up to? I spy a ring on your left hand, too!"
"Even though I remembered his name." Sami added, smiling at Sam.
"I'm an equal partner at a sports medicine office in Chicago and I've been married since summer." I smiled broadly, and wished that Antti was here so I could show him off to my friends.
"I knew you wouldn't stick around here long after graduation." Sam said, smirking.
"Well, you know me." I smiled back. "So who's all here?" We turned and surveyed the gym.
"The game is gonna start, let's find a seat." Sam suggested and Sami and I followed her onto the wooden bleachers I had spent much of my high school winters on. There was usually nothing to do in the winter in town unless you're at a basketball game, or snowmobiling. The chill of winter never made it into the warm gym at night and the fun atmosphere made it a perfect hang out for friends.
"Well there's the basketball team, reunited at last." Sam joked as we found a seat and she began to point at players. "You remember most of them, right?"
I did a mental catalog and surprised myself by nodding and replying, "Actually, yeah I do. All of them." I scanned over them with my eyes, saying their names in my head.
"Spiffy. If you look over there, we've got the old basketball cheerleaders back together. I'm so glad I didn't cheer in winter." Sam said. She only cheered during football season. In the winter, she played girls varsity basketball.
"Wow, they didn't age much." I commented.

"Well, look who it is!" One of the basketball players came our way as they warmed up.
"Remember him?" Sami leaned over and whispered in my ear. I looked at her, my face clearly saying, 'of course I do'.
"Yup. How have you been, Andrew?" I tilted my head and asked him politely.
"He's still loaded." Sam said, laughing.
"Family business. What can I say? I heard about you working for the Blackhawks- how did that go? Date half the team?" Andrew smiled his stupid smile and I just smiled back.
"That was awhile ago. And, even though I only dated two players, I married one recently." Again, I wished that Antti was sitting next to me, looking less like his shy self around people and more like his scruffy, Finnish god.
"I heard. The goalie? I didn't know you were like that." I just scoffed at his comment and was about to say something scathing back, but someone pounded on my shoulders.
"The Game!" The person said as they sat down next to me.
"Nick!" I shouted, immediately grabbing for the John Deere hat that adorned his grinning head.
"That's nice." Andrew commented from in front of us.
"Go away, dude." Nick said, shaking his head at the basketball player.
"Whatever." At his retreating back, Nick made a face and turned to me.
"So how have you been, ATV buddy?"